Hi…posting after a loooooooong time…n im crossing my fingers …hoping that my writing kills haven’t rusted to oblivion….
N wat im going to write about isn’t a personal experience…but i’ve tried to explore those emotions…so wat u waiting for….gear up!!!

A terrifying shriek followed by a sharp wail…. and lots of beaming faces congratulating each other and laughing!!!

Weakened by prolonged stress and labour, I collapsed on the bed and shut my eyes. Through a haze, I saw a nurse bring a small bundle to me. As I curiously unwrapped the folds of the soft pink blanket, I looked at the tiny human inside, yawning; as if to declare how fatigued she was… how she was stressed out with the strains of appearing in this world…

As if by magic…all my fatigue had vanished. I just can’t describe the array of emotions that welled up within me…within my soul…
I felt as if I would burst with the sheer intensity of powerful and contrasting feeling surging through me…

Looking down at the soft, delicate body lying beside me, I felt awed. Awed by the fact that I had given birth to her, that she had been growing inside me for a period of those eventful nine months; that it was through me that she had made a grand entry into the world.

I felt proud. Proud to be a mother…proud to say that I had given birth to a human being…proud because this cute, angelic baby had been a part of me and still is….

As I was gazing at the baby, full of wonder and surprise, i was struck by such overpowering feelings of love that it shook me to my very core… it was like this tiny human being had become the center of my universe…she had become my reason for existence..
I would love her with my life…love this tiny helpless creature
 who would depend on me for her survival, for her emotional and material needs. It was as if she was just soft earth…. n i could mould her into any which way i want..

Suddenly i felt cowed down by the huge responsibilty that had been entrusted to me …i realized I would be responsible for her , for all her actions, her tantrums, her rudeness and all the trouble she might create during her adoloscent years.If she got poor grades, I would be considered responsible. if she broke school rules..I would be summoned to the Principal’s office…if she turned out be a brat…everyone will question my manner of bringing her up…my parenting skills would be under surveillance… or worse, if she turned out to be a societal menace, I would be doomed.

As I seemed to drown in these oh so pessimistic thoughts, I heard a movement beside my bed. A firm but tender hand closed down upon mine and I found myself looking up into the awed and happy eyes of my husband. As we smiled at each other, he kissed my forehead and looked curiously at the tiny creature bundled securely in a blanket beside me. 
He bent down and touched the silky softness of the baby. As if by intuition, I knew he wanted to hold his baby. I smiled at him, encouraging him to do so. He picked up the baby gingerly, holding her tenderly in his stong hands.She seemed so tiny, so small in his large but loving hands. He held the baby in the crook of his arms, fingering her soft curly hair.

Suddenly as if by struck by lightnng, I realized that this was the moment that would be permanently etched in my mind…FOREVER..
With our baby still in his arms, he encircled his other arm around me.

He smiled at me and all my previous worries seemed so insignificant, so foolish. I felt strengthened cause I knew that this little miracle had bound  us in forever in the warmth of unconditional love… warmth that only can be felt in a family…

Though my body felt tired, my heart felt love and my soul infinite peace. In my mind’s eye, i began picturing my baby’s dawdling, how her face would light up with laughter, the way she would shower her innocent affection on us. I began seeing her as a responsible youngster, a confident adult and a loving human being.

An inner radiance lit me up as I felt showerd by God’s blessings and love. I was humbled by the Almighty’s power,the way he had chosn me as a medium to bring another life on earth… which had brightened  up my life, our life.

The other day I was watching Desperate housewives ..and as i got sucked in the seemingly mundane lives of the characters…i started wondering whether the Indian women are desperate too..
Desperate to have a baby, desperate to maintain their status-quo, desperate to prove their individuality in a family that takes it for granted, desperate to be seen and be acknowledged as a nurturer…
And if they are desperare …are they desperate enough to do something about it? (as in the soap).

Well..i’ll tell you the case of my aunt..an intelligent and ambitious woman..Phd. in psychology..flying high in her chosen career. She was forced to sacrifice her career to adorn the identity of Mrs. so and so..yup to become a housewife. When she rebelled she was told nonchalantly that why did she need to move out of her house when her husband earned so well and provided her with all the material comforts..? why indeed?
Doesn’t she want to be a good wife, a good daughter-in-law, a good mother?

Can’t she be a good wife..and so and so without sacrificing her individuality? Why does she have to lose one facet of her personality to adorn the other?
Wont she be a desperate housewife then…desperate and restless? Desperate to break the forced strings of  relationship?

Even when a woman becomes a housewife…willingly so..why is it that her contribution to the household is not acknowledged…why is she taken for granted?
This thought popped in my head as i was watching a hindi soap ” thodi khushi thode gham”..where the daughters-in -law of the household protest against the lack of acknowledgement and appreciation from the male members of the household.
Why is it so difficult to appreciate the contribution of the housewives…the home-maker?

I feel that in some aspects its the housewife to be blamed ..as she never makes others feel the importance of the work she does to enable the household to run smoothly.
As one woman said when asked about about what she does…”I’m just a housewife”!!!

Women…stand up and be proud…as you do the toughest job in the world…
tough and often thankless…
Make your worth known…coz others wont respect your job if you dont respect yours…