“The Princess”………. Part One…

Dear Reader,

My Blog " The Princess " is nothing but simple scribblings of my wandering thoughts based on a story describing Panchali's secret fascination towards the Star of Mahabharata ' Karna Infact I read that few months back in a weekly.As per them, it was described in Puranamanjari.I don't know whether its correct or not.Any way, the base of my blog is the above said thread.To feel the freshness, I have made certain deviations from the orginal text.And finally, that my blog has nothing to do with the Great Epic.

Since it is lengthy, I wish to publish it in few parts.Need your evaluation.

Request: If U dont have time to read it in one sitting, Pls dont read it…..The feelings are given to experience ….

Best Regards

Love

Aditya Das Menon

"THE PRINCESS" 'PART ONE

The evening climate was bit more cooler than the previous one .The quilt of darkness brood over the palace much before the normal time So the lamps were set on early Indraprasta was crowded by the visit of Lady Vrishali who was on her way back from forest after sparing few days with Rajmatha Kunthi, Gandhari and Maharaja Dhritarastra She was heading towards her village where the old aged parents were alone there In between she made a brisk visit to the palace too

Folding the hands, she stood in front of me

"So u wish to travel during the night itself" ? .looking at her,I enquired .

She replied with a  smile ..

"Madhu, we have made all arrangements for her safe journey.Nakul will ride on another chariot to lead her and Sahadev will follow both of them "Realizing my concern of the night journey,Maharaja Yudhistir, my husband replied .

" Can I send Vyjayanthy too, my most loyal servant"? I asked her

" Not required Rajmathey .I am safe .you need'nt worry at all" ..

Moving forward, I cuddled her

" Don't you know, that I keep genuine concerns for you and don't you know that, you are blessed as always ."? .I muttered into her ears ..

Her silence calmly accepted my wishes Along with Maharaj, me too walked down to the entrance of the palace and finally she left to the village .

Clasping my hands, Maharaj walked back to my room and sat on the bed ..My eyes peeled him .The silver growth on the hair even at the beginning of the old age reflected the restless mind .The continuous sadhanas helped the body to be more flexible and thinner From the face,I sensed  an array of disturbing thoughts passing through his mind Looking at me,he whispered ..

" When ever I meet lady Vrishali - the widow of Maharaja Karna, my own elder brother ,the  mind rewinds back ..and . I feel, like  my Prince stands in front  .Keeping the hands on my shoulder, the gorgeous figure reminds about the tough path of commitment, and basic knowledge of Rajneethi .I feel as if he hugs and advices how to rule the country yet keeping the commitment in search of truth .I feel as if we both walk down to the shores of Ganges and offer arkhya to Lord Sun Its impossible to forget those feelings as they linger in the memories for ever " His throat horsed and he paused  for a minute Then continued ..

"Madhu, I feel him .even now, after twenty years of war .and I realize him too ..I know that  am not the legitimate Ruler Nevertheless, I rule for him ..Like him, me too is trying to stick the path of commitment "

Turning back, I gazed at the sky .He spoke again

" Madhu" ." "We fought a war for justice ..How many years we dwelled in the forest? Though we lacked the basic comforts,we were never in short of mental calmness .The vanavas period rather helped us in meeting thousands of saints, learning their lives,their experience in search of truth, and mixing with different cultures Everything helped  in realizing the essence of eternal life .. I sorely miss those treasures after becoming the ruler .Now, I am carrying a heavy heart which is growing further I try to find solace on the shores of Ganges .Yet, I am tired .."

 Standing from the bed he continued "Madhu, I experience the richness of a wandering youth during Vanavasa period and emptiness of an aged Ruler now The time has thrown a question to me .. Am I eligible to rule ?  or winning a war is the only eligibility , when a bare handed Yudhistira and his brothers were allowed to kill the great leaders of this majestic land ..??..I rule for them who loved this land more than themselves and accepted the death rather than killed by us I rule for them who sacrificed the comforts and moved towards the path of perfection .and .. I rule for them who blessed me to achieve the material wishes and then to realize the reality, that all those comforts are noting but simple bubbles only .Once it breaks, human mind too falls down to earth The life has become a journey from one desire to another The moment we achieve something,the emptiness of achievement turns the heart to feel vacuum.. .Suddenly , from somewhere, another bubble of desire appears and we, the mere mortals run after it ..The so called foolish act continues till the end .Even death too fascinates with the desire of living in heaven afterwards ..But I have never heard of a heaven or a hell in any other world ..I realize the fact that, the so called glittering heaven or the most dreadful hell are noting but the simple creation of mind only .According to each thought, karma changes and the heaven and hell too .Nothing is constant here including my current thoughts too .Emotions, feelings, heaven and hell change on thoughts .And they continue to intrigue me" .Keeping disquieting silence for few minutes,  he whispered again .

"I don't know , You too have tied up yourself in this room Why cant u make a visit to Hastinapura and spare some days..?? ..At least that will help you to regain some sort of lost joy ."??

" Regaining the lost joy? . that too at this age? .No Maharaj ..that is not required at all .I find solace in this room ..No other place can console me like this ."

Taking a deep breth,I again gazed through the window ..The chilled weather and  embracing wind made the body nippy .A feeble song echoed from the shore of Ganges .Like me and like my five husbands-The Pandavas, .some one too was trying to find solace on her shores ..

" Madhu "  .

Turning back,I stared at his eyes which were distorted with parched dreams His face appeared pale due to the onslaught of emotions and feelings .Keeping me close to him, he glared .Then, keeping the left hand around my shoulders, he caressed me with the right one. ..A drop of tear appeared in the eyes .He kept the lips on my forehead .I could well feel the radiating heat from it .The eminent King of the Kuruvamsh, Maharaj Yudhistir stood there for few minutes .Then, he walked down to the central hall ..

I pained at his expressing feelings that were inexpressible in words After the war, most of the days were like that only .Feeling desolate after his leaving,I was in an overwrought state of mind Yet I tried not to clutter my mind with all those vibrations …

Time was nearing the midnight .The palace seemed slipping into deep silence I moved towards the window again Normally nights during the month of "Margasheershka", were always chilled Since it was the previous one to Pournami,the gleaming sky glittered with numerous stars embraced by the full blue moon ..How many nights , I spent like this?? I stared enthralled at the magical effect of the moon and the stars in kindling the vibrations of soothing for those pitous hearts and romance for those blessed few ..

" What is my feeling .now? " I asked myself  ? " soothing or Romance? ..Romance? , at this age?..after meeting lady Vrishali ? or after feeling the perennial pain of Maharaj Yudhistir???  "

Through the window, I tried to find my little star which normally appears on the northern side of the palace ..For the last many years, the little one with a beaming smile, had become my panacea to the disturbing thoughts .During the sleepless nights, I stood near this window, and looked at it. Cladding my soul with it's cool blue rays, it caressed my heart with the velvet touches ..

" Hey, where is my star?.."..the dry throat asked to the skies ..The wet eyes searched it through the thousands present I knew, that my little star was kidding with me by hiding somewhere among the others .I eagerly searched it all over the sky Finally I found it……………,Standing alone over the eastern side of the palace .and smiling at me .It then travelled further down and embraced the marble memorial of the Lone Prince of the epic who rest over there Keeping my chin on the iron rode,and without moving the eyebrows, I stared it ..the immortal star of the epic The Prince Karna

" Hey, star , how long you can hide yourself from me? . Don't you know that , I have reached the final phase of life .? Don't you know, that I have become old? Don't you know, that I try to search solace in you? I know, that you are immortal .and memories of you too ." I became totally oblivious to my surroundings

"Rajmathey,kindly have the food" The sound of a request touched the ears

It was from Vyjayanthi ,my most loyal servant .She had been with me for the last forty five years .

"Rajmathey, you look so tired"? .She asked politely .

I stared at my star again .and turned back, to answer ..

" Vyjayanthi, You have been with me for the last so many years .You have grown up to the level of a friend, rather than a servant ..and I have allowed you to mingle with me freely I am glad that you have never crossed the limits .Your doubt is correct I am not feeling well .You know, we fought our final war exactly twenty years back during this month…The thoughts of pain, missing and loss seem to be riding back again .I am neither feeling hunger nor sleep I wish to stand near this window, and feel my little star Let my memories start rush in ..coz they too offer me a lot of space to find solace ..Let my mind again wander in thoughts U too wish to wander with me? ."

Vyjayanthi's eyes wide opened

"Your face shows the growing interest. To wander in the skies of imagination,I tell you a  story of a young Princess who shared the absolute material comforts, yet missed the quintessence of life sorely .Again it is the story of a young Princess who was forced to betray her soul first and body later .and the story of her, who loved romance yet lost the feelings by a whisker ."

Through the window, I gazed at the memorial again ..Sitting on the tip of the obelisk,my little star seemed inviting me towards there

To be continued

adityadasmenon@gmail..com

HANDS OF LOVE-18

It was April 2004 .I reached Kannur after a gap of 3 months As usual, checked in the Mascot Beach Resort during midnight.The long trip from Delhi to Chennai and from there to Calicut and finally to Cannore, made me so tired.Though the body suffered tiredness, mind was in the rejoicing mood of late night office binge pertaining to the beginning of the financial year.It was around early 1.30.Setting the mobile alarm to  morning 6.30, I tried  to hit the sack

Though the mobile phone alarm rang continuously, the morning syndrome pulled me back to get up from bed Ordering for a cup of tea, I planned to workout for the day's appointment.Though wished to enjoy the sleep for another one hour, the sound of the room boy woke me up .

While sipping the tea, the eyes traversed through the news paper and finally glued to a painful photo .A man sat on a coat and his son, a seven year old boy was seen hugging him I stared at the photo again and again ..Read the news published along with which narrated the story of a young boy and his dad who was suffering from mental ailment ..

Balu, the seven year old boy was forced to sit alone in home to take care of his dad Ranjan-a psychiatric patient.The kid's mother ran away with someone when he was two years old.Ranjan was working as a mechanic in the nearby automobile work shop.For him, the ailment was purely hereditary. Though his father and two elder brothers were suffering the same,they were better in managing it.But,Ranjan's case  was the worst.Whenever his mind slipped out, the young kid was the sufferer by experiencing  the strange behavior including the cruel slams too.But, whenever Ranjan returned back to normality, he hugged the kid and loved him a lot But it was unpredictable to understand in which mental state he was in normally ..Since the family was financially poor, the relatives too alienated from them.The neighbors and the local NGOs tried to help.Part of food were shared by the neighboring house which was not sufficent.Sometimes when Ranjan was in conscious stage, he obliged his kid .Ate the food and took the tablets .But whenever his mind slipped out he threw the food on the kid's face too The young boy surprisingly shared a bigger heart to understand his dad ..The report concluded with a plea to the reader to help the ill fated father and son .

It felt so much..I  thought to meet them and recommend to the NGOs known to me ..While sitting in the car, the report and photo made an eloquent appeal .

" Abdulla" I asked my driver ." U know the place Aailakkad?"

" Sir it is around 10 kms from Kavumbhagam Desom"

" Means around 15 kms from Tellicherry?"

" yes sir "

" Can we reach there in half an hour? ."

" Yes sir "

We maintained silence again .Abdulla never spoke too much .He was very much familiar with all places .Being my trusted driver in North Kerala,normally my plans were informed him early, so that by the time I could reach the airport, Abdulla was ready with his cab. .

Since the news was published, we didn't face much difficulty in locating the house ..Abdulla stopped the car near one junction and made an enquiry. ..

Showing a narrow path,he confirmed " Sir, we have to walk down this way for another two kms" .

I alighted from the car The place looked like a 18^th century desert .No shops were seen at all ..Few local men were seen congregated and stared us.Among them, one fellow voluntarily approached us and offered help in leading us to the house ..Down the narrow path, we began to walk

" Some people came in the morning after reading the news" .The fellow's voice sounded …

"Though it was published only today, Ranjan has been suffering from this problem for the last 4 years " After a pause he again continued ..

" The little boy's condition is too pathetic .Bhaikka, an old aged man and his family is staying the next door.They are doing their best to take care of the little kid"..The fellow elucidated .

Me and Abdulla simply heard what the fellow communicated to us ..I continued to watch the whole area .Normally, finding a village in Kerala was a tough task ..But here, in this Aailakkad, all developments seemed to be in standstill from 18^th century itself .

" We informed the local administration . but where is the time for politicians?" The fellow was in full flow .

The sun was blazing down that afternoon .The dust danced with the wind and created problems to me

" Is here any medical shop? Any grocery shop?  And any school?" I opened my mouth

"Medical shop is located 5 kms away, grocery shop at'  3 kms distance and school- another 2 kms far"

We walked down for another twenty minutes and finally  stopped in front of a small house

" Bhaikka .Bhaikka ."..The fellow called someone loudly …

On hearing the voice, an old aged man came out .

" Bhaikka, they came to visit Ranjan and Balu . take care ..I am leaving" ..

Asking Bhaikka to take care us, the fellow disappeared to somewhere ..

Bhaikka looked care worn ..Aged around 80-85 years,his eyes were partially closed and he found difficult to stand Clasped to a walking stick,Bhaikka looked like a different figure altogether Wearing a white dhoti,the old man doddered down the path ..

" So you want to meet them?" his voice crumbled. .

Instead to reply, I simply gazed at him ..

" Come with me ." Turning back, Bhaikka began to walking down the frontage of his house and moved to the next one .Then turned back and invited us ..

" This is the house .you can get in now "

I wasted few minutes in searching for a calling bell .Though I knocked the door,no body opened that. ..Abdulla simply followed me .A frisson of excitement ran through my mind .Slowly I tried to open it. Suddenly somebody from inside pushed it back so hardly which gave an unexpected punch on my face .The sunglass fell down Though the bang dazed me for a while, I recovered immediately. .

I stared at Bhaikka .With a gester,he pacified me and asked to try again

I was much cautious then ..Suddenly a laughter emanated from inside Preparing myself ready to face another attack,I pushed the door with  full force. .Strangely nothing happened at all ..A person was seen sitting on a coat and laughing loudly .On viewing us,he began to blustering and shouting at every one .Finally the bluster changed into bawl .A little boy who was seen sleeping on the cement floor  suddenly got up,hugged him and pleaded not to bawl ..Gradually, the man tried to contain.. ..Finally,placing his face on a pillow,he lay down The boy, without speaking anything, collected a glass of water from a mud pot and helped him to drink .The man , after drinking it, again lay down .I looked at  Bhaikka .

" Don't worry..this is usual here You are very fortunate now..Normally he slams this little kid .throws water on his face ."  Bhaikka fibbed

Approaching the boy,I held his hands . He was wearing a trouser which was partly torned .The eyes envisaged the utter life's experiences suffered in the whole mankind ..He smiled at me The forlorn look and face shot through my heart and cut the top soul .

"Balu" . I called him .

" Yes " His feeble sound came out ..

Without asking anything I looked at him for a moment ..

"U want to study?" .The innocent kid gave a chuckle in response to my query.

His painful look continued to tug at my heartstrings

" He is  good in studies ..very much intelligent ." A female sounded from behind the kitchen wall..

" Ie is my daughter- Sulfith she teaches him when ever she gets time " Bhaikka confirmed .

Ranjan fell in deep sleep .

" It is so hard to digest the pain of this kid .Each drop of his tear burns like a volcano and asks the GOD about his ill fate at this younger age .Who is responsible for this? His mom ran away with some one when he was at the age of two Father is in this condition .when other kids go to school why he can't? When others eat lavishly, why he can't?? . at least for a time? Look at this ." Pointing on the reddish marks of slams over the body of the little kid,Bhaikka continued " But you know, whenever Ranjan comes back to consciousness, he wants his little kid be along with him .he hugs him , kiss him a lot ..the dad never want to get separated from the son..the son too from the dad But the pain begins when his mind slips out .Many organizations came here to take Balu along with them.No body has shown interest in Ranjan But the kid never moves to anywhere and with any one leaving his dad alone .Sir, no body is here to help The doctor confirmed that the disease is curable..But…I am living in the next hut with my wife, daughter Sulfith and son- Salim .whatever Salim could make in a day by doing the ordinary work, we share with Ranjan and his little kid ..and life moves on like that .But how long?"..Bhaikka bemoaned .

We listened enthralled to what he was saying ..

Opening a small box, he took a prescription .

"He has to intake three different drugs daily..and regularly he takes only one Since the other two are costly, we buy them only when some body  offers money "

I checked that ..His current problem ' The higher stage of agoraphobia was mentioned over it ..I was really in a cleft stick .The young kid sat on the coat where his dad slept ..

Abdulla handed over a packet of fruits and biscuits to Balu which we bought on the way

"Open it and have something"..I told him

" No .., let my pappa too wake up" .He whispered in a low volume

We moved out the house ..

" Bhaikka" .I called him

" Please keep some money with you ." With out waiting for the reply, I handed over a cover and walked down to the narrow path .

Though I left Aailakkad, The little kid,Ranjan and Bhaikka were very much alive in my memories ..I wished to meet them in between….But coz of unexpected work and travel schedules I could not .. till 2006 June .

June 2006 - The month of torrential rains ..Once again I walked down the narrow path of Aaailakkad along with Abdulla ..

" Abdulla,do u remember everything".?.I asked him

" Yes sir..everything ."

We didn't speak much .Memories were falling down scene by scene in our minds .I was so eager to meet them…Finally we stopped in front of Bhaikka's home .

" Bhaikka ..Bhaikka " .My throat sounded loudly ..

The old aged man - Bhaikka came out of the house .With much anxiety,I ran towards him .Bhaikka stared at me .He struggled a bit to recognize ..

"Bhaikka,this is me..Aditya .do u remember? . I came here two years back to visit Ranjan and Balu "I tried to help him out to recollect ..

After few seconds of deep pondering,Bhaikka replied "Yes..I do remember you ..I remember your long hair .You gave me some money too"

"Yes Bahikka .I am that person" .I answered immediately .

"I want to meet Ranjan and Little kid- Balu" .

Bhaikka's face dimmed suddenly eyes wet lips quivered continuously .He tried to mumble out something

"Ranjan died a year back..Balu has joined with an orphanage at Coimbathore" .Bhaikka's wife answered  from behind ..

Bhaikka's face was distorted in agony ..Moving forward, he held my hands ..Grim silence brood over there ..

" Where is Sulfith?" I asked calmly

" Got married and with her husband at Kasaragod " .She breathed..

" And Ranjan's house"?

"Still here .It is waiting our little kid .Two months back he came here along with a teacher..Infact he was admitted to a hospital due to asthma. When the doctor asked him about a wish , he wanted to  visit his home, spare a day in the room where he spent with his dad..So they both, kid and a teacher came here Our kid stood for hours in the place where his dad was buried .then slept in the room along with the memories .We know he still lives with the memories of his dad who loved him, kissed him, hugged him whenever his mind was in conscious stage " Her throat horsed continuously and she finally burst into tears .

With much difficulty to manage the emotions,Abdulla walked towards Ranjan's house .

"Sir we are about to leave this place We have sold our home to one of our relatives because our son needs money to go to gulf to find  better job .More over, we have borrowed money from local relatives to conduct Sulfith's marriage.To pay back the debts, finally we sold it and bought a small one at Alakkode which is four hours travel from here.We will be leaving by August.Till now, we maintained Ranajn's house.We wished to hand over it to our kid when he will come back. .But, when we leave from here ie too for ever, I don't know what all will happen?" Bhaikka finally flatter out few words .

I didn't reply .

"Please come inside..and share some tea" .While cleaning the wet eyes Bhaikka's wife requested ..

"I wish to visit Ranjan's house first ."

I walked towards there .The house was maintained very neatly Entering the veranda, I sat down on the bench The silence was too grim to handle . Yet the breath of a little kid echoed over there .After sparing few minutes,I moved back My legs were too tired even to make a step .

"Can I get the address of Balu?"I asked Bhaikka's wife ..

"Since me and Bhaikka are illiterate, it is available only with Salim and Sulfith.But Slaim too is out of station ." Bhaikka's wife replied

"I have bought two pairs of dress and some fruits for Balu .If you are here and if he reaches here to meet you before you leave this place, please hand over it .."I requested Bhaikka .

Handing over the clothes and fruits, I turned back and walked down the narrow path Bhaikka, slowly proceeded me .We walked for around 100 meters Far away, over the top of the hill the remaining structure of a very old building seemed embracing the skies

"Bhaikka, Do you know that?" I asked him .

" Yes, that belonged to the Royal family..It was their rest house .My grand father was a loyal servant of them but people belonged to the royal family left this land…for ever…………."

"Bhaikka,that was not the rest house alone …Infact the members of the royal family  once used that as a place to meet, discuss, and settle issues of the local people "

"Yes I knew that also But how do you know all those information? ………

I didn't reply at all .Standing over there, I pointed the eyes towards those remains .The clouds were seen busy crisscrossing for a heavy down pour .The wind continuously blew heavily all over the place My long hair fluttered in it .

Touching me from behind, Bhaikka asked ."Only few have visited here twice.What made u to reach here again?"

I turned back and smiled Far away, though lost for ever, the memories of the erstwhile rulers of the land continued to shower the rich heritage and culture

"Bhaikka," Opening the mouth I whispered ."I want to give you some money ..Please don't deny"

" No I don't want .Last time also u gave money" …

Holding his hands into mine , I replied .." You are destined to get some money now If I could not hand over it to you, somebody would reach here to fulfill the fate I pray to be blessed by availing that chance .and this is the only thing I can do now Please,don't hesitate ..Heavy down pour is imminent..So don't follow me too   ."

Bhaikka dithered over to accept it or not ..Closing the eyes, he stood like a statue . I kept a cover in his hands .

Far away , standing in front of their "sold out" home,his wife witnessed everything ..

I threw a glance at him .His face slowly crumpled and he began to cry.He had been quiet delirious with leaving.We both knew, that was our second and final meeting .

Folding the hands, I made a final bye .then walked slowly the whole 2 kms to reach near the car .

" Sir, U haven't handed over the  toy "..Abdulla reminded me

" Abdulla, I will visit here again, the day when Balu will be back .."

The heavy rain finally unleashed .I entered the car Opening the small packet, took the toy It was a small train which ran on two batteries..I switched on the key and it slowly moved with a noise .After switching off,I kept it back…Bending backwards, I rested the whole body weight on the back seat .Elsewhere a boy lives with the memories of his ill fated dad Sitting alone, he enjoys the hugs , kiss and the brutal slams too when his dad's mind slips out Being alone,it is sure that he feels utterly bereft.His mind tempts to rush back to home, to spare a night again in the room along with his dad's memories ..He is about to miss his Sulfith, Bhaikka and every one too ..and it will take years for him to reach back to home, if it would remain over there ..Till then, his toy will be kept safe with me ..Till then .and .Till then

Aditya das menon…………………

adityadasmenon@gmail.com……

.

MUMBOS N JUMBOS ..

This blog revels the kind of funny probs that I have been facing during the scribbling of the blog HOL-18.

After publishing the HOL-17, on 28 th of August 2007,as usual, I moved back to my den of laziness.

" Means it is holidays blogs for another two weeks.I have to travel a lot and for sure I will be so much busy " I found solace in excuses ..

"Are baba, tell the excuses to your friends, not to me " My conscious retaliated fast. ..

" Sorry .I forget your alertness" I tried to console fast

Days moved fast .As usual, I traveled a lot ..The free timings once used rightly for scribbling were smartly converted for hibernating .

" Why should I scribble now?? last one was posted very recently only ." Was my side of justification .After a long tour, I finally reached back home on 14^th September night .

On 15 th morning, woke up by around 10 am..My wife,Niladri das menon seemed so busy in kitchen ..

" Madam..shall I help you?" .I tried to exhibit the humbleness so that her pleasing was badly required to squeeze some time from the family allocation to complete the blog .

"Wow So much of humbleness and obedience?" .An astonished Niladri stared at me ..

" Yes dear, for a peaceful family life,Humbleness and obedience are must" I went on with my strange behavior

" What happened to the promise that u had made yes day night regarding the morning walk?"

"Well .I woke up by 5am Then kept the alarm to 5.30 , then to 6 ..then to 6.30 and finally turned it off .."

"Aditya….you are too good in finding excuses I know you better than anybody .But am now confused at your strange behavior Something is smelling somewhere ." Niladri became apprehensive .

I was in an excellent mood to write HOL18 Mind dwelled very much in feelings and emotions Only I know that how much concentration was required to scribble an emotional blog .Finished the bath and prayers quickly .and finally opened the laptop by around 11.30 Typed the heading "HANDS OF LOVE '18" ..

"Wahhh ..now I have got realized on your humbleness . So u wanna sit with the computer now? ..I told u yesday night itself that I have to buy some clothes,give them for stitching, then make a visit to beauty parlor for henna please come on with me .U can btr scribble in the afternoon ."Her response to the furore over my sitting with computer was quiet understnandable .

"Why not sweet girl???..No probs .I will, for sure, come along with you..but one doubt..How can I do henna??? Am not at all experienced in it ."

"Are Adi, I don't want u to do henna ."

" One more doubt Niladri?.How can I enter  a women beauty parlour?"

" I don't want you to enter there..U can rather wait in the car .." With out waiting for my answer Niladri rushed to the bed room to change the dress ..

"Hue, today is lost ..what to do?" I asked the computer.Reluctantly acquiescing to her plans, I stood up .

"For a peaceful family life, obedience is very much required"..A funny dialogue from an old malayalam movie rushed into the mind "For buying clothes, it might take a maximum of 45 minutes, for henna treatment another 45 minutes, for travel another 30 minutes..So that I could well resume to scribble HOL-18 by around 2 pm " I worked out a simple calculation

As usual Niladri drove the car Had I drove it , I could have reached the textile shop in 15 minutes time..Since she was in the driver seat, car was stopped in front of a ladies store, then in front of our milkwala's shop..In between her friend called over the cell which made a loss of another 5 minutes Finally it took almost an hour to reach the textile shop.Then it took another one hour  to complete the purchase By almost round 1.30 pm, we rushed towards the beauty parlor .But Niladri was totally exhausted ..

"Dear I can't drive now and am feeling so much hungry .."A tired Niladri finally declared .

" OK .we will go to Hotel Prince, and have buffet lunch ."

"No Adi . I don't want to have buffet..I wish to have lunch from a very small and clean vegetarian hotel..a village type, dhaba type one."

"But where shall we find it??" .

"Normally they are located near the temples Better we try to locate one .."coming out from the driver seat Niladri said

I looked at her .My fingers continued to impose delicate touches on her face .."Why dear..seems to be exhausted?"

Without any reply,Placing my hands on her chest, she closed the eyes ..

We drove to each and every temple and the nearby locations to find a dhaba type shop..But no where we could identify a satisfactory one .Our search continued without any time limits .It was around 3.15 pm..Niladri slowly fall into a nap .and I too had started feeling hungry .

" No option darling..we will have buffet now which is the only option available "Keeping my hand over her shoulder,I tried to wake her up .

Finally by around 3.45 after noon, we came back to the hotel and rushed towards the central hall where buffet was normally being served ..

"Soory sir, buffet is closed U can have snacks now ." With due apology, one of the service boys confirmed .

I gazed at Niladri who was in no mood to have any tiffin or snacks.

" what's the fun in having  tiffin now ?” A much tired and confused Niladri Das Menon stared at me ..

" Chalo, we will have some butter nan,Roti and Paneer " .Holding her hand, I moved towards the restaurant ..

Finally we reached back home by around 5'O clock evening .My laptop seemed ridiculing me ..

As usual , the next day morning, I sat again to scribble HOL-18 ..With much determination, I had completed first sentence.Suddenly my littlie kid approached with a request

" Pappa,I want to go to moon" .

Flabbergasted for a minute, I stared at him .

"U want to go to moon???, why suddenly u want go ???"With wonder, I asked him

"Am not at all feeling good here..U know,yesterday while I was watching Pogo Channel, I had seen all my cartoon friends coming out from moon So I too thought of traveling up to moon "

"Are baba,Cartoon characters can go any where..even in Sun too but we can't "I tried to make him understand .

" But u told me about Neil Armstrong last month?? Means he too is a cartoon character?"

"No Lalith, Neil was very much a human being and , well u too can go moon for that, first u have to complete 20 yrs..means u have to wait for another 13 years more .Securities in moon never allow anybody less than 20 years to enter ."

"No probs pappa U can take me upto the entrance of it and I will enter the moon the moment I complete 20 yrs"Lalith was in no mod to leave me .

"Well..we will discuss about that later..First you complete the homeworks..ookey??"

Though not satisfied with my answer, I somehow persuaded him to go back

" Chakde Pakistan .Chakde Pakistan".While walking back to the living room, Lalith raised the slogan ..By hearing it, my brother's son, five year old Aman also joined along with Lalith and slogan was raised again in much higher volume They suddenly became boisterous .

"Are, it must be Chakde India not Pakistan " I tried to correct them

" No pappa..for us it is chakde Pakistan only .." Lalith's voice became so much determined ..

" Why son .???explain to me"..I was much eager to hear

"Whenever there is cricket match on TV, you and mom get glued to it and you never allow us to watch the cartoon channels during cricket matches Whenever there is a feeling that India might loose, u usually switch off and leave and then only we get a chance to watch our favorites For  us, either u should buy another TV or its should be chakde Pakistan ."Lalith was quick to impugn…

"But we are Indians..and we should always raise " Chakde India " only .."With lot of convinction,I finally acquiesced the kids to comply with me ..

"Lalayel pancha varshani

Dasa varshani tadayel

Parptheshu shodashe varsheni ..

Puthram mithravad achayel .." ..Suddenly a sloka from Chanakya Samhita popped up in the mind ..

"One can pamper the kid till 5 years .age between 5-10, is for nurturing with basics..for that even parent can use stick too , if needed.Age between 10-16 is for advicing ..and from 16^th age onwards, kid should be considered as a friend " but now a days, parents consider kids as friends from much younger age itself ..

"pappa, I wrote a poem..Just read it ." He came back with another thunder. ..

A "TIME" POEM .

"I am a clock ..

I have two hands .

My friend's name is time .

She is always 12 ..

And she always walks .

"How is the Poem ??????"

" Good please leave off me for some time .lemme complete this ." I pleaded to both of them

When I was about to complete the first paragraph, Lalith rushed back again .

" Pappa,there is a shortage of RS 10/- in my purse..Have u taken it?” Lalith alleged .

"No, I haven't taken Btr Check with mom ."

" She confirmed that she hadn't taken it .."

" OK..take Rs 10/- from my purse ."

" Well,Now I feel that there is a shortage of Rs 100/-"

"My dear fusspot, don't grizzle take only Rs 10/- only "I turned on him with a sudden furry.

Mood was much obliterated by the above detailed discussions .So I finally planned to go for a drive with Lalith and Aman .It was around 12 noon .Niladri was busy with preparing notes

"Aditya Why can't u scribble a poem?" ..

"But poetry is not my cup of tea ."

" Then what?? Try to scribble one " she motivated me .

I scribbled something in another 30 minutes time which was published under the name " Togetherness" ..

The noon was spent on moving out with Niladri and Lalith

But as usual, HOL-18 was then kept pending ..

It was another Friday, 28^th September . I had planned to complete HOL-18 by night But it took around 2 hrs to drive from Cochin to home .I felt very much exhausted..Adding more masala to my worst condition,one of my cousin waited me at home by 10'O clock night and we had an atlength discussion on an important subject till midnight.Finally I nestled down the bed around 1'O clock early morning .My laptop again continued to ridicule.

The very next day ie 29 th of September 2007,Saturday,I  travel up to Trichur with Niladri to attend one important function .

On Sunday,30 th of September,I satdown again to complete HOL-18 Typing work seemed really grinding.Time was around 11 morning Finished one more paragraph..Suddently Niladri invited me from upstairs ..

"Adi..Oh Aditya .. please come fast ."

I knew pretty well that her she invitation was based on silly reasons..Yet I went upstairs .

"Look at there"..Pointing her fingers towards the neighboring house, she directed me .

My neighbor, doctor couples who spare their whole time for consultation, were seen busy in cleaning .

"Its really fun man What happened to their servant?'"

" You feel fun coz u have entrusted the job to servants,,But u too must do the same when servants go on leave .."Niladri started lecturing

"Why not ??" cuddling her from behind, I reaffirmed my ability in cleaning the home too

"Ie great and it means that u will be helping me to arrange the wardrobes now ..? ..I stared at her who was really enjoying my situation with a laugh .

Sat again to scribble HOL-18 immediately after a sumptuous lunch …

"OH My GOD..I am feeling so sleepy .."

" Aditya "Niladri is again inviting me to upstairs .

"Hey friend, can't u hear that voice? .I have to get up now I know pretty well that she is inviting me for mumbo jumbo reasons..But I have to go, coz I have to squeeze some time from the family allocation to complete the blog.For that, Niladri’s blessing is a must….So, I continue to believe in that funny dialogue from the old malayalam movie ."

"For a peaceful family life,obedience is very much required"

Aditya das menon

adityadasmenon@gmail.com….

Dear Ilander

A blog in the name ” Reflections of Aditya’s mind ” is  published in Nilima’ Dahat’s iland.Nilima is one of my close friend and the said blog truely reflects one of my xperience.Please read it..Her id is pearll.rediffiland.com/ 

Regards

aditya das menon……………

TOGETHERNESS


He woke up and whispered to the shadow stood in front…Hey,
can”t u remember the subtle feelings and colours that we weaved together?
the lovely touches, deepest kisses that kindled the myriad feelings..which
kept us together to redefine the life and after…?



Hey, can”t u remember, together we shared the soul and body???
Together we became one and all?
Together we traveled all the way to lead a life of togetherness?
And together we tried to console while parting?



Hey, can”t remember, together we hoped to meet again while….
leaving apart to somewhere for ever and ever….
I still wait for the day of meeting you…..
So I pull the life day by day………….



I feel you each moment ……breath by breath…..
escalating ripples of feelings remind the harsh reality,Yet……
tender whispers still reverbarate from with in…..
Come back to me and hold  for a moment…..



My eyes filled, lips quivered and throat hoarsed and…..
I live in the backdrop of yar memories…..
Yet I pull on again in the hope to……
resurge back to experience the togetherness with you……


aditya das menon………….

adityadasmenon@gmail.com

HANDS OF LOVE - PART -17

Folding both hands together, Kamadev replied to one of the queries of his elder brother- Narada ..

 ”Prabhu,those who have realized the pinnacle of absolute romance, keep it close to heart  till the last breath .It doesn’t mean that their desire became fruitful ..Seldom very seldom achieve it Most of the innocent lovers are forced to sit alone to unravel the lost yet profounding memories of it .I too feel the pain while separating the innocent lovers.Yet, I do it coz am destined to do the duty of - making into romance and pulling out from it - .I too feel it unbearable Yet I perform it ”

.” Prabhu ” looking at the anxious face of Narada,Kamadeva continued

” U know, . for most of the lovers, romance is just an outer shell of the untold feelings Inside it, one realizes the perennial pain, unavoidable separation, and absolute missing Yet, the instigating obsession inspires ..Those who experience them …never forget them ..and those who forget them never experience the romance as ' it- is ”

The 12 yr old boy met 11 yr old girl for first time in Tellicherry-North Kerala during one of the annual vacations ..Both their grandmas were lived alone in neighboring houses.While he was not regular in visiting his ancestral home, she was so dedicated in keeping the relation with her grandma by sparing some days in each annual vacations.Later,due to the unexpected transfer of his mom to Coimbathore from Delhi and continuation of studies with Lawrence School- Ooty, prompted him too to spare the vacations with his grandma.

While the boy looked dreamy, the girl illustrated higher levels of intelligence and maturity ..Their regular meetings and togetherness slowly carried them to share the unique feeling 'romance- at the younger age it self. .Marking each day in the calendar, the boy and the girl impatiently waited to meet during vacations .Studies became symbolic ritual where romance played the pivotal role.The relation strengthened on passing of each year.For them, the term "Romance" denoted the paradise where only both stayed, shared and enjoyed the ecstatic feelings.. The grandmas were enfeebled by old age which made the conditions supportive to their grandchildren .Ignoring the carnal desires fully, they gave importance to the celestial feeling- Romance .At the outburst of it, she addressed him as "Krishna", the fascinating name of the Romantic GOD.

The intense relationship continued for another four years.During each vacations he, arriving from Ooty and she, from Calcutta joined together and weaved the finest and myriad feelings on earth.Finally, his mom's transfer back to Delhi made their condition sad .

Fluttering over his face, she bemoaned " I am going to miss u so much .tell me, when can we meet again ???"

Like always, pointing the eyes towards the infinity, he replied calmly " U know, How much I struggled to reach here to meet you?? .Am about to leave Lawrence as my mom's deputation is over by now and  we are moving back to Delhi to join with family .You know, each day I marked on the calendar and counted how many days were left to meet you again Hereafter I won't coz I don't know when can I meet you again .I can't say a bye to you .Bodies may part but minds never .Sitting far away,the your memories will continue to remind me about  your longing  .."

Tears gushed out from her eyes .Cuddling him so strongly, she rested the head on his chest.He continued to pat all over her body

"Don't you know that we two gems hemmed along the romantic thread and me glittering on the reflection of yar rays? and when u leave of me, how can I pull on this life ?? ."The girl continued to bemoan

Without replying anything, the boy,placing one of his hands around her waist, aligned her so close to him. His lips traversed from the lower portion of her left ear ..moved towards the cheek and finally rested in her mouth .

 In few hours time , he left Tellicherry ..

Incidentally during the next Christmas holidays, they met again…to attend the funeral of her grandma .Instead of sorrow, she expressed the calmness

" Nice to see you in relaxed mood today " he tried to pacify her ..

"Obviously I would have felt depressed hadn't I met you now You know pretty well about my attachment with grandma .But now your presence makes me lighter . I miss u so deeply ..and so badly ." Etched in pain,she replied .

He stared at her face.The gleaming dark eyes reflected the never ending passion towards him. ..

Clasping one of her fingers, he gave a beaming smile ..Both realized the worth of a simple touch and its greater magical effect too .

" Krishna, I miss u " Her mouth fell open again . The throat hoarsed .

The boy went back to Delhi with in two days .The girl too to Calcutta along with her family where they settled .But in their memories,the Tellicherry home continued to haunt with mesmerizing feelings After reaching Delhi, he spent another year and finally came back to Kerala and settled 300 kms away from Tellicherry ..But with in six moths after the death of grandma, her ancestral home was sold to a third party The boy tried to collect her address from one of the distant relatives But that didn’t give the desired result as the her family had finally migrated to Singapore ..Yet her memories, somewhere down the line,continued to dote him so strongly and deeply ..

It was 25 th February 2007, 19 years after .

Venue : Regional Cancer Center- Trivandrum .

The 35 yrs old man was driving his car one of his colleague, Mr. Anil, was sitting near with him .They were heading towards RCC to collect the biopsy report of Anil's dad. .Though all the indications confirmed of an early development of tumor, Anil was slightly tensed

RCC, the prestigious organization sprawled over acres, bundled with concrete buildings and big trees evoked different set of emotions .Though it was unable to breach the gaps, they somehow managed the parking.Time was around 12.30 noon and they were the last to reach the lab before noon.The attendant directed them to collect the report from a doctor's cabin.Since one patient was busy in consultation with the doctor,they waited  outside While Anil sat on a chair, the lad moved towards the entrance of the building ..Morning session was about to finish ..

" Anil Gopalakrishna Pillay " ..The lady doctor's sound vibrated from the cabin ..

In surprise and in shock  he rushed towards Anil, held his hand so strongly and asked him to wait ..The lady again raised her voice

"Hey, am I dreaming..? Anil…hear me…., if the doctor who is sitting inside is of the name which am about to spell, plz send  a tinkle to my cell" He instructed Anil without wasting any time and after spelling the name, he fidgeted there .With in 2 minutes, the tinkle was received ..

Crossing the fingers so tight, the long haired boy waited agog .Memories rushed 19 years back .Everything was picture perfect.The colorful frames began to flash The Tellicherry home, mighty surroundings,beautiful pond, murderous hugs, sweetest kiss,and her wooing body smell everything…The surge of emotions were so sublime which continued to evoke the immortal feelings .

With in half an hour, Anil came back ..

" Tumor is confirmed.Since it is in the development stage,she gave a ray of hope .any way I have to meet Dr Shaji Jacob for an early appointment….U plz sit here..Will catch you in another ten minutes time ."..Anil rushed towards the second floor .

It was the closure time for lunch .the nurses and attendants moved towards a big hall ..The continuous flow of people suddenly stopped and the whole area became almost empty .Finally the lady doctor came out from the cabin .She was wearing a yellow sari .a small pendant was seen glittering on a gold thread bided around the neck The hair was brushed into topknot tied with a yellow ribbon and the beautiful face clearly expressed the youthfulness and juvenescence. Without noticing him,she ambled down the  doctors' room .

" Can u spare a minute with me?? " Standing from the chair,he asked her in low volume .

She turned back .Her eyes zeroed in on him.Mind raced back in unbelievable pace.Crossing the hands together, he smiled ..The same smile which fascinated the same girl 19 years back.. ..

Was it a surprise or shock? She couldn't believe her eyes Slowly walking towards him, she stood around 3 feets away and continued to gaze at his long hair, face, eyes and lips ..Heavy silence brood over there .Both the hearts throbbed with emotions ..

" Never expected me here isn't it?" He asked quietly

She replied by nodding the head But the eyes continued to peel him without any flickers.

Her body language confirmed that she wanted to say something The heart leaped into the throat but words were swallowed again just beneath the tounge..Her body swerved unstedily.Yet she tried to bridle with a long breath But the eyes reflected the naked feelings .Behind the grim silence, both hearts continued to whisper Though he too experienced the same depth of feelings, he was better in managing the ebb and flow of them

"How are you?"

The reply was far more symbolic Her head bend down, lips quivered..It was hard to manage the escalating emotions .Realizing it,he wished to avoid the questions but the mind was much curious ….

" Family"?

"Settled here, near Kesavadaspuram" .am staying with my parents..brother is working with Tecnopark One kid- Harshita- completed 6 years . And about you? Why here?" She managed to falter out few words.

" One kid- a boy- completed 7 yrs..Came here along with Anil ."

"You haven't told me about hubby"?

Her head bend down again and she didn't speak at all ..

"Missing Singapore and Calcutta too much?"

" I suffered the worst miss in teenage .Nothing could be so deeper and so dearer ." Without raising the head,she sobbed It shoot through his ears sharply and cut the top soul For a while, both didn't speak at all …

" Anything else u wish to know?" Titling the face upwards, she asked .Her flushed face and wet eyes reflected the saga of immortal feelings they both shared together years back ..The same body smell - once enjoyed, floated on his nose . 

He floundered for few seconds ..then dissembling the emotions, finally enunciated "Thanks for recognizing me .." .

Far away, standing near the car, Anil became a mute spectator.

" Can u send a tinkle to my cell so that I can save your number?"..Envelpoed in pain she sighed .

Checking the time on the wrist watch, he whispered " Its too late by now May I leave of u ?"

Without waiting for the reply, he moved towards the car….

"Krishna" ..she whispered from behind… .”I sincerely wished to meet you somewhere in life ..Now, at this moment, I don't keep any desires at all”

He stood there for few seconds .The realization of “so close yet so far” made ripples of emotions .He walked towards the car…Before entering it, inexplicably turned back She, the doctor, who gave a ray of hope to Anil, was seen standing over there ..The car slowly moved.Both the guys didn't speak at all Infact they were down in different sort of memories .

Another meeting with her .?  No..and never..Why should ?  and for What? .

Shutting down the memories are near impossible .The effusions of feelings and emotions of a lost love will keep on and on and on .The crest waves of her body smell continues to embrace the mind,and the soul and the song  heard from the car stereo while returning from RCC never ever…. evanescents from the memory .

” Look into my eyes  where you  stayed .

Look into my heart where you lived .

Sitting beside me  so near yet  so far .

Don't ask me to love u again And .

Don't ask me to love u again ..”

Kamadeva revealed an episode of a lost love .Narada gazed at the grim face of his younger brother then slowly walked away without spelling a word ..The  monastic elder brother was in different set of feelings and emotions which were never experienced directly.The wind blew again .For the younger brother,it's the time to get into the duty- the duty of pushing into romance and in the later stage pulling out the majority from it ..The flow of subtle feelings and emotions resumed to rush in .. The perennial pain, unavoidable separation, and absolute missing, all leave the lovers feel rather bruised.. Yet the obsession continues.. to venture them again ..till the end …and . till the end

Aditya das menon .

adityadasmenon@gmail.com…………….

HANDS OF LOVE-16

After the creation, the visibly excited GOD asked the man

"Son .In which form should I dwell?"

The innocent man, replied calmly ." I need u in the form of mother "

Delighted by the answer, GOD promised " Sure, I dwell in you, as mother and as dad too..The divinity can be completely realized by devoting your duties to them Hereafter,my form would be of Shiv-Sakthi . the dad and the mom .." 

It was on May first week 2007, I came back to home after enjoying a week of holidays In the evening, went to meet Doctor Santhosh who was five years younger to me. .As usual, patients stood in queue to meet the young doctor.Because of my attachment to the family, without ringing the bell, I entered into the house.Agape in relief and happiness,Aswathi or Achu - Santhosh's wife 'hurriedly came forward from the kitchen .

" Have been missing u for the last one week .when did u come back ?"

"Early morning..I thought to extend the trip for another 3 days.I know, today is the fifth death anniversary of Santhosh's dad thought of sparing sometime over here. ."

"ie very good Santhosh was much concerned on your absence .He must be happy by now Please wait.I will prepare a cup of coffee" . She went back to the kitchen .

Santhosh's late father-Devanarayan or Devetta 'As I addressed him respectfully, smiled  from the big photo

With so much of respect and affection,I gazed at him ..Mind moved backwards .for many years

Devetta,the avuncular, soft spoken and least ambitious person led a life which was unfortunately lopsided towards struggles and losses. .His dad and his uncle were once good friends which led to the mutual marriage to their sisters .In the first night itself, Devetta's dad informed his wife about his prevailing responsibility towards one of his friend's sister and her kids Shocked with his cryptic words, she wanted  to reveal the kind of relation he was sharing with the other lady and her kids But he tried to keep  the secret within himself .Managing a week stay with her, he left from there for ever ..That was the biggest shock to her who later became pregnant from him .They hadn't seen him for yonks One fine morning, after a period of 8 years, Devetta's dad came back to the home again .The anxious family was aflutter about meeting him .But the dream shattered again on realizing his need, which was limited only to collect the signatures from her pertaining to his pension papers as she was the legal wife .

Entering the home, Devetta's dad sat on a chair.The son stood in front of him and gazed Without sharing a glimpse at the son, the dad opened a bag ,took some papers , and asked the wife to affix signatures.Raising the head, the wife stared at the hubby for the first time after such a long time.But he was in no mood neither to discuss anything including about the son The mom slowly carried the son into her arms ..She wished to handover the little kid to his dad But Devetta's dad looked bizarre .Though the son silently whispered " pappa",it didn't have enough strength to shoot through the dumb ears of the dad.Hugging the little kid, Devetta's mom closed her eyes Tears rolled and fell down on the son's face Without taking the eyes from the dad, the son continued to whisper " pappa " The 7 year old boy couldn't understand why his mom was crying.Instead the boy continued to expect that his dad would touch him any moment the first touch in his life .But nothing happened at all After collecting the signatures, the husband left the place for ever and ever .The little kid pushed the mom back and rushed towards the taxi But, by that time his dad had eclipsed for ever ..The boy ran after him for some yards ,fell down and later admitted to hospital .That was the first and final meeting of Devetta with his dad..The derelict mom and kid continued to stay with her brother. But dad lived in the dreams of the little kid.  The mom had had to surmount the challenge of bringing the kid.

Years moved like a rocket Devetta's mom and uncle became old.To pull on the life, Devetta yanked out of college and forced to seek a job.Though struggled a lot ,the young kid crusaded against the fate in securing a govt job that transmitted positively the living conditions of the family.Respecting the words of his mom, Devetta offered life to a poor girl,Sujatha .

Santhosh was born among those innocent people who were denied the greeneries of life.But the fate continued to fiddle without any intervals.the little kid's second year costed him the mom..and it was the turn of Grandma when he was at the age of 3 ….Though playing the roles of a dad and a mom together were the toughest task, Devetta performed  them gracefully..The dad and son shared together the hard realities of life ..Many people compelled him to remarry..But his life was fully submitted to the little kid Each of his hugs to Santhosh reminded of a young kid, - years back, who missed sorely the similar feelings from his dad.Santhosh was more than a breath to Devetta ..Holding the hands of Santhosh, Devetta and me together spent many days on the shores of sea, back waters and green paddy fields ..The less spoken man found ultimate solace in his son .The son too was so much understandable.Who else could give the needed inner peace to such a profounding dad except his lovely son? .Devetta never desired his son to be some one famous Instead he wanted the kid to be a good human being The dainty son was much brilliant too in studies which prompted the dad to think in medical line..Time moved fast and as expected Santhosh joined for MBBS. The lonely dad was never willing to get separated from the son So he applied for 5 yrs leave and moved to Trivandrum.They both stayed together in a small rented room near the Medical College .The son continued his studies with the help of scholarships The wants and needs were with in limits..So the expenses too. .Santhosh completed his MD too and joined with Alleppey Medical College Hospital ..

I still remember his the first day of practice. Devetta had organized a free medical camp, Invited the old aged people and Santhosh offered his pranams to each and every one The last turn was of the dad's ..The son fell down at  his feet.Initially the dad stood like a statue Later he tried to carry the kid in his hand But the son remained to rest his head at the lotus feet of dad .Devetta managed the emotions within the heart. .But he throw a pale look at the old photo of his sweet wife Grim silence brood over there The people who gathered, silently wept in joy, and in pain .Two aged men tried to pacify the son and brought him back.That was the day one of Santhosh as a doctor .The son tried to excel the wishes of his dad Winning over the lust of making money, he lead a meaningful life as a doctor .Obeying the dad's wish, the son too married to a poor and distant relative Aswathi..or Achu .But again the peaceful days didn't last at all..Succumbed to cardiac arrest,Devetta bid the bye to the world. The son suffered the bereavement again. . But the boy moved across the places to organize the free medical camps for the downtrodden and continued to delight the souls of his parents .

"Seem to be in deep thoughts?"I came back to the reality on hearing the words of Aswathi ..

“ Yes .just thinking of a great dad ."..sipping the coffee, I replied calmly ..

" Can u kindly wait? .Santhosh will come out from the cabin now for a pray at the memorials of his parents ..He is on fasting today .."

" Why is he on fasting?"

" He just wished to do it Did not sleep at all through out yeday night .was very much painful in the memories of pappa" ..

" Doesn't he know that Devetta can't bear it?"

" I tried a lot but he is very much adamant in his decision "Achu bemoaned

"Have u prepared the food?"

" Yes .. ..and I have already lit the lamps at the memorials , waiting him to finish the prayers and then to have the food ."

Through the window, I stared at the memorials of Devetta and Sujata Both the lamps were seen flickering very fast though the flow of wind was almost standstill. .

"Achu..look at the lamps..both are flickering very fast .As I told u .His dad and mom are in deep pains today coz their son is on fast ."

Noticing that,Aswathi moved towards the window Keeping her face on the iron rods, she too gazed at the lamps .

The silence seemed sharing the sadness very much ..

"Hey bhaiiya ..I really wanted you here . today "On hearing the male voice, I turned back It was from Santhosh who looked a bit haggard as if he hadn't slept for days together .

"Reached by the morning ..Why  are u fasting  today? Don't u know that Devetta can't bear it? ..Look at the lamps and how fast they are flickering?" I was a bit emotional by that time

"After a period of 3 years, Achu is pregnant now .and slowly me too is getting into the feelings and emotions of a dad Still I meet pappa in dreams regularly .U know..still he hugs me holds my face and keeps it on his chest .Still his voice reaches to my ears..still it reverberates .Had he been alive now, u know how much happier he would have been?" He replied in a low volume .

" Well, now u slowly realize the subtle feelings of a dad ..ie very good Tell me, if your son wish to fast for u for any reasons in future, can you bear it? Tell me honestly?"I continued my twitter to him

For a minute, Santhosh had been quite delirious to give an answer to me . I understood the surge of emotions in him His face smirched by the grim and rust .Brimmed with tears,he quietly replied " No ..I can't bear that ."

"Santhosh ..u are a good son of a great dad .Even without seeing your kid, who is foetus, if u could realize the emotions of a dad, why can't u understand the same feelings, and the same emotions, on higher levels, of a person who had sacrificed the whole life for you?….Santhosh , I can hear the words of Devetta ..I could visualize his face too who is looking at you and directing me to advice you to have the food . No parents, in any form either in physical or in astral, never wish to see their kid fasting for whatever be the reasons ..realize it and this is my personal conviction .."

Santhosh kept mum.. The young man seemed shivering might be in the memories of the dad ..I instructed Achu to bring the food .

She brought a  plate full of fruits, two chapattis and with dal Without telling  anything, Santhosh took a piece of chappathi,pinched with dal . then glimpsed at the lamps flickering on the memorials of his parents.I could very well understand the escalating emotional thoughts passing through his the mind. Rising the head,He throw a compassionate look at the photo of his dad and then kept that piece into his mouth .After eating a portion of apple too, he walked towards the memorials of his parents and stood in front of them.I envisaged the rising crescendo of emotions converting into cascades of tears and rolling down from his eyes. .The waiting patients stood up in respect ..

Cuddling from behind, I enunciated in his ear .

"Hey, .Look at the lamps The moment u had your food, the flickering stopped The moment you touched memorials, both lights became more brighter..How much your dad and mom loves you ."

Santhosh didn't reply at all The tears from his eyes continued to pour like a stream ..He held his hands so strongly on the memorials .I knew , that his mind had reached in a different world and must be enjoying the deep hugs from his sweet mom and dad ..

Decamping from the surroundings, I ambled down the street

" Aditya " somebody called me from within .It was from Santhosh's mom

" where are u going "? .. she asked me ..

"Am just walking down to the next junction .."

" Don't u know that my kid is alone here? Don't u know that he is emotionally tired today? Why can't u come back?"..the mom expressed her anxiety .

" Am not going far off..I wish to walk down to the next junction and will be back soon "

" But Don't u know that my kid is alone here? "She continued to express her anxiety

"Where is Devetta?" .asking myself,I looked back ..

As usual Devetta, in astral body, was seen holding his little kid's hands, keeping them on his chest  , and kissing continuously on the forehead .. .

"Aditya,Don't u know that my kid is alone there? "Again she sounded from within .

Who else can pacify a mom except herself? .

I have increased the pace of my brisk walking coz I have to return fast I know a mom and a dad are waiting for me to spare some precious moments with their emotionally down son So I have to walk fast .faster than the normal course .

Aditya das menon

adityadasmenon@gmail.com……………….

This incident happened around 6 months back…..I got a sms from my seven year old son while I was attending a meeting at Delhi….

” Pappa…I want a lion”……I didnot respond…………

After 5 minutes I got another sms…….

” Pappa , I want a rabbit….”…I ignored that again….

After 10 minutes I got one more sms….

“Pappa, I want a monkey “…..That time I thought to respond……..

” Why man, already a monkey is there in home..so why you want one more?”……………

With in 5 minutes I got the reply……..

“Ookey Pappa, show your tail when u reach home”…….

Aditya Das Menon……………