“albs” blog

For all “Khichdi” Fans……

Hansa & Praful-Dictionary
“DECIDE”
Hansa : Praful “Decide” matlab ?
Praful : “Decide” Hansaaaa-a … vo Casettee player mein hum casettee nahi dalte usme hota hai na …. “A side” — “B side” …. to “C-side” … “D- side”
—> “Decide”

“Mature”
Hansa : Ae Praful, mature matlab ????
praful: jab apna mahesh…chori karte hue pakda gaya tha.. tab usne kya kaha tha ?
hansa: usne kaha tha.. mujhe chodd do…. “MAIN CHOR NAHI HOON”
..main chor …..main chor…..mature. ..acha acha….”

“Alphabet”
hansa: praful alphabet matlab?
praful: alphabet hansa,local train mein safar karte hoye maasi jaise hi koi seat khali dekhti hai to wo apni beti alpha se kya kehti hai?
hansa: alpha beth seat pe,alpha beth,
oooooooooooo, acha toh yeh alphabet!!

“Asset”
Hansa : Prafulll “Asset” matlab???
Praful : Asset Hansaaa ….
Jab hum gaadi mein jaate hai and jab gaadi signal par rukti hai ….. taab vo bhikari log aa kar kya bolte hai …
“Aee Seth… thoda paisa do naa” … ” Aee Sethh …. ” … Asset ..

“Depend”
Hansa : Yeh Depend kya hota hai Prafful??
Praful : Depend Hansa… wo Swimming Pool mein ek taraf to paani kam gehra hota hai, aur dusri side zyada gehra….. Deep-End.. Depend!

TOURNAMENT
HANSA:- ae he he PRAFUL, TOURNAMENT MATLAB??
PRAFUL:- TOURNAMENT HANSA!!! YE JO TUMNE JHUMKE PEHNE HAIN, GEHNE PEHNE HAIN INKO ENGLISH ME KYA KEHTE HAIN, BOLO BOLO!!
HANSA:- AAA HAN HAN TOURNAMENT, (HANSA KHUSH)
MELISA:-(CHIDH KAR) ARE USE TOURNAMENT NAHI ORNAMENT KEHTE HAIN
HANSA:- ARE KUCHH BHI MAT BOLLL
EK JHHUMKA — ORNAMENT, DO JHHUMKE — TWO ORNAMENT# #TOURNAMENT

“AE PRAFUL!! YE MELISA KO BHI BABUJI KI TARAH KUCHH BHI NAHI ATAA..” :-D

“elastic”
Hansa: Praful elastic matlab??
Praful: Elastic Hansa..
apni voh Shradha ben unki beti ila …
usko jab fracture hua tha to voh kya leke chalti thi??
Hansa : Ila to…
Ila-stick leke …
Ila-stick !! Ila-stick!!!

“Automatically”
Hansa: Praful automatically matlab??
Praful: aare Hansa.. agar koi aadmi ganja hota hai tou ussko kya bolte hain…
Hansa: taklaa..
Praful: aur agar koi ladki ganji ho to ussko kya bolenge…..
Hansa: takli..
Praful: aur wohi ladki agar auto mein baith kar kahin ghoomne jaye tou ussko kya bologi??
Hansa : auto mein takli… aare haan automatically!
Tum kitne samajhdaar ho Praful…

HAPPY KHICHADI TO ALL OF UUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

“ALBS”

AGAR AURAT PAR HAATH UTHAYE TO ZALIM  

BELIEF - 1 :
SHE WLL NEVER BE SATISFIED:

TRUTH :

Woman are always looking for ways to makes things better. Dont take her suggestions as Complaints or Critisms, but as her desire to make the Relationship or Situation the best that it can be.

BELIEF - 2 :
A STRONG, CONFIDENT WOMAN DOESNT NEED A MAN TO TAKE CARE OF HER :

TRUTH :

Everyone Loves To Be Taken Care Of and To Feel Needed. Even if a Woman can fix things around the house or change the oil in her car, She will still ask for help so she can feel Your Strength, Support and Protection. Dont Ever Stop Asking, Å“What Can I Do For You ? because it shows her that you care :

BELIEF - 3 :
WOMAN ONLY WANT TO CONTROL MEN :

TRUTH :

Its Not About Control ; Its About Love. When a Woman sees a Man Hurting , Struggling or Overwhelmed, Her Goal is to Help, Not Control. Let Her give You a Helping Hand.

BELIEF - 4 :
KEEPING A WOMAN REQUIRES A LOT OF HARD WORK, TIME AND MONEY :

TRUTH :

A Serious Relationship Requires Time and Effort to Cultivate It. You shouldnt Look at it a s a Burden. Your Wife or Girlfriend will reciprocate the effort you put into it.

BELIEF - 5 :
YOU CANT LIE TO WOMAN :

TRUTH :

Woman Are Extremely Capable of Picking up Moods and Attitudes and can easily r ead Body Language and Facial Expressions. Although You may think that You have gotten away with a Great Lie, She is either letting it slide because She wants to keep the Peace, or She is Lying to Herself because Shes Afraid of the Truth.

BELIEF - 6 :
JEALOUSY AND POSSESSIVENESS ARE A PART OF BEING A WOMAN:

TRUTH:

Woman are Protective of What Belongs to them. They Protect the things they Value, especially when it comes to Relationships. Its not that she doesnt Trust You ; She is Guarding the Relationship. You are too Precious to Her for Her to allow anything bad to happen .

BELIEF - 7 :
WOMAN ARE EMOTIONAL :

TRUTH :

Woman Dont Hide their Feelings. They articulate whats going on in their Minds. There s nothing wrong with emotions .. We All Have Them. Being in Touch with their emotions causes women to be Sensitive and Caring, and thats why Men Love Them…

Don’t break our unity so stand together for 24 sept. no MASJID no MANDIR just one word one nation “INDIA ”

  “The moral duty to be expected in different ages is not a unity of standard, or of acts, but a unity of tendency. At one time the benevolent affections embrace merely the family, soon the circle expanding includes first a class, and then a nation, then a coalition of nations, then all humanity and finally, its influence is felt in the dealings of man with the animal world.”

“I offer you peace. I offer you love. I offer you friendship. I see your beauty. I hear your need. I feel your feelings. My wisdom flows from the Highest Source. I salute that Source in you. Let us work together for unity and love and against violence.”

“ALBS”

I love my mother as the trees love water and sunshine - she helps me grow, prosper, and reach great heights.

My mother is a poem
I’ll never be able to write,
though everything I write
is a poem to my mother.

Mothers hold their children’s hands for a short while, but their hearts forever. 

My Mother is always with me…. She’s the whisper of the leaves as I am walk down the street. She’s the cool and on my brow when I am not well. My Mother lives inside my laughter. And she’s crystallized in every tear drop.

MUMMA Misssssssssssssssssssssssss uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

“ALBS”

Here’s the formula for the perfect handshake
Brit scientists reckon that they have devised the formula for the perfect handshake.
The traditional form of greeting needs to be

executed with the right hand and a complete grip, firm squeeze, cool dry palm, three shakes with medium vigour and no longer than three seconds, all accompanied by an appropriate verbal statement.

Manchester University researchers have unveiled a mathematical formula for the “perfect handshake“, which, according to them should convey respect and trust.

The formula is: PH = ? (e2 + ve2)(d2) + (cg + dr)2 + ?{(42)(4

2)}2 + (vi + t + te)2 + {(42 )(42)}2.

In other words, sweaty palms, limp wrists, gripping too hard and lack of eye contact were contributors to a bad handshake.

Geoffrey Beattie, the university’s head of psychological sciences, took twelve key measures into account that would convey trust and respect.

“The human handshake is one of the most crucial elements of impression formation and is used as a source of information for making a judgment about another person,““ the Courier Mail quoted Beattie as saying.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF  A WOMAN  
  
Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa . Half discovered, half wild,
fertile and naturally beautiful!
  
  
Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe ….well developed and open to
trade, especially for someone of real value.
  
 
Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain , very hot, relaxed and
convinced of her own beauty.
  
  
 
Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece , gently aging but still a warm
and desirable place to visit.
  
  
 
Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain , with a glorious and
all conquering past.
  
  
 
Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel , has been through war, doesn’t
make the same mistakes twice, takes care of business.
  
  
 
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada , self-preserving, but open to


meeting new people.
  
  
 
After 70, she becomes Tibet .. Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past
and the wisdom of the ages…  With an adventurous spirit and a thirst for
spiritual knowledge.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF  A MAN     
Between 1 and 80, a man is like Iraq & Iran , ruled by nuts.
  
 
THE END.

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