Im so upset…….in the past few months i have felt like shit, felt like a load of crap, felt useless, worthless, jobless, aimless…..but i havent felt quite as bad as i am feeling rite now….today im movng around in fear of ruining a very very dear friendship and of losing a very dear friend, one of my best friends…..all cuz of me…..or so i am to think……the worst part is im helpless…becuz nuthing i say or do now can change wot has happened….and its killing me to know dat i cant make things allright….its also killing me to find dat im still unable to blame myself for this….its not ego, its my conscience…..i dunno if my conscience is misplaced but it has supported me in my actions………
……..da past few days have been such a roller coaster ride…everythings been moving so fast that i havent really had time to think…..think….maybe dats smething i shd have done….no hang on…. i did think, i thought a LOT…..i guess i just wasnt thinking right….dats wen u need smeone to guide you….at the moment, i have no one to confide in….not for a while……but im so restless…had to get my frustrations out in some form….. i guess dat xplains da reason for this absurd blog….if u cared to give it a read, my apologies to u for an absolutely senseless post….for the time being, im gonna practice patience……cheers
Do i plead Guilty?
Posted in Personal.
– May 30, 2006
3 Responses
Stay in touch with the conversation, subscribe to the RSS feed for comments on this post.
…oh …and yes…if the person is truly a friend, and understands what friendship is all about in the true sense of the word, that person ain”t going anywhere far. Sometimes, we just need to do something. Its called courage to stand by yourself and leave it to your friend to stand by you. Worth is what will come out of it; something that was meant to be good eventually…and if it ain”t right just now, it isnt eventually yet.
i can also identify with your post .. in the recent days ,i have been going through a lot…. but , id say count your blessings first before comparing your unhappy life to another person who you might think is much happier than you… but, for all you know ,others may be fighting a much harder battle…. ,n if youre so frustrated, find people to talk to , or write a diary
Sometimes the best of intentions are expressed using the worst choice of words..it is not deliberate. It is just a struggle between your mind and your heart…you want someone to understand you jsut so desperately, and our heart is in your mouth and what you want to say never really comes out the way you want it to…hang in there…this is not a senseless post by the way…I for one, identify with it every single day of my life!