If Bollywood Film star work for call centers…….. Imagine the calls.
Amitabh: Thank you for calling customer care… rishte mein to hum tumhare baap lagate hian filhaal ek customer care hain…
Customer: (angrily) I NEED YOUR MANAGER
Amitabh: Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne mere baap ko chor kaha tha.. Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne meri maa ko gaali dekar naukri se nikaal diya tha.. Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne mere haath pe yeh likh diya tha… uske baad uske baad mere bhai.. Tum jis manager ko kahoge main laaonga.
..
Dharmendra: Thank you for calliiiiingg..
Customer: I need help
Dharmendra: main aaraahoon maa…….
Customer: I am unable to use your product… its waste and worthless
Dharmendra: Kutte mein tera khoon peejaaonga..
Customer: What!!! I need your manager
Dharmendra: (To his manager) Manager is customer ke saamne nahi naachna
Shatru : Aaaaaiiin Kis ullllu ke patthe ne call kiya hai…
Customer : How dare you speak like that
Shatru : Khaaaamoshhhhh… seedhi tarah bolde issue kya hai warna… haaaaaaaaa!!!
Asrani: hahhaaaaaaa naya kabutar ne call kiya
Customer: I lost my invoice
Asrani : Hahhaaaaaaaa hamare jasoos kone kone mein phaile hue hain miljayegi hum angrezon ke zamaane ke rep hain..haahhaaa
Kestu Mukherji: Iiiiiihhhhye….
Customer: hi
Kestu Mukherji : iiiihhhyeee tumko ….tumko kya problem hai
Customer : I have not received my product
Kestu Mukherji : To saale (hicup) main kya karoon.. Police mien report likha…
Shakti: AAAuuuuuu…mera naam hai balllllllllma. Thank you for calling aaauuuuu
Customer: I need your manager
Shakti: Mujhse baat karona.. Main ek chhota sa, nanha sa, pyarasa…rep hooon..
Mehmood: Ayyo Dyevi … thank youji for calling ji.. Ayyo
Customer : I am not devi
Mehmood : Ayyo muruga… ye dyevi nai ji … ye to dyeva hai…
Ajit: Saara shehar mujhe Lion ke naam se jaanta hai….. May I know your name please
Customer : Mona
Ajit: Mona darling… tumne hamein call kyun kiya
Customer : (Angrily) I WANT YOUR MANAGER
Ajit: Mona dear.. Agar hum tumhe hamara manager de denge to hamein manage kaun karega….
Gabbar : HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ….Jo dargaya wo maraga… batao tumhen kya chahiye
Customer : I want to buy a product from your company
Gabbar: Kitne paise hai re
Customer : $ 10.00
Gabbar: Suvvar Ke baccho ….. sirf… $10.00…dhikkaar hai
Prem Chopra: Prem…Prem naam hai mera.. Prem chopra…
Customer : I lost my invoice I need one
Prem Chopra: Kar bhalaa to ho bhalaa…..jaa apni invoice khud dhoondle
Rajkumar : Jaani ….. Tumhara ye call bahut keemti hai.. Ise cut mat karna
Customer: I lost my invoice
Rajkumar: Jaani… ye invoice hai.. Bacchon ke khelne ki cheez nahi
Customer : shut up.. I need my invoice sent to me in 10 minutes… otherwise I will speak to your manager
Rajkumar : Dhamki kisi aur ko jaakar dena… manager humko darasake manager mein itna dum nahi… humse hai manager… manager se hum nahi…
And at last ………………
Sharukh: Thank you for kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Customer hung up the phone….
STARS AT WORK
Posted in Fantasy.
– February 16, 2009
some good things,some bad things
Some very Good and Very bad things …
The most destructive habit……. ……… ……Worry
The greatest Joy……… ……… ……… ….Giving
The greatest loss…….. ……..Loss of self-respect
The most satisfying work…….. …….Helping others
The ugliest personality trait……. ……Selfishness
The most endangered species….. ….Dedicated leaders
Our greatest natural resource…. ……… ..Our youth
The greatest “shot in the arm”…….. ..Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome…. ……… ….Fear
The most effective sleeping pill…….. Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease….. …….Excuses
The most powerful force in life…….. ……… .Love
The most dangerous pariah…… ……… …A gossiper
The world’s most incredible computer…. ….The brain
The worst thing to be without….. ……… ….. Hope
The deadliest weapon…… ……… ……..The tongue
The two most power-filled words……. ……..” I Can”
The greatest asset……. ……… ……… …..Faith
The most worthless emotion….. ……… ….Self- pity
The most beautiful attire…… ……… …….SMILE!
The most prized possession.. ……… …..Integrity
The most powerful channel of communication. ….Prayer
The most contagious spirit…… ……… ..Enthusiasm
The most important thing in life…….. ……… .GOD
Posted in Philosophy.
– February 15, 2009
you are truly mine
You are like the diamonds that shine and glisten in my rings,
You are my Angel, you are turly my everything
You are like the fine bubbles in my wine
You are all that I ever have on my mind
You are like a warm summer blowing breeze
You are all my heart will ever need
You are like a shining stars in the sky
You make me feel so loved and alive
You are like a beautiful waterfall that overflows
You are turly in my heart and soul
You are and always be my one and only love
You are like a dream i prayer will be ture
You have no idea how much I’m in love
With you.
You are truly in my heart and soul
Posted in Poetry.
– February 15, 2009
LOVE V/S EGO
Once upon a time there was an island
where all the feelings lived together
One day there was a storm in the sea
and the island was about to get drowned.
Every feeling was scared but Love
made a boat to escape.
Every feeling boarded the boat
. Only 1 feeling was left.
Love
got down to see who it was..
It was EGO..
Love tried and tried but ego wasn’t moving also the water was rising.
Every one asked love to leave him and come in the boat, but love was
made to love.
At last all the feelings escape and Love dies with ego on the island..
Love Dies because of EGO
Posted in Love.
– February 14, 2009
MYSTERIOUS LOVE
The Mysterious Thing Called LOVE …
If you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn’t choose to rest in the other person’s heart.
If you find someone else in love with you and you don’t love him/her, feel honored that love came and called at your door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return, do not take advantage, do not cause pain.
How you deal with love is how you deal with you, and all our hearts feel the same pains and joys, even if our lives and ways are different.
If you fall in love with another, and he/she falls in love with you, and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it or to assess blame, let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will know in time .
Remember that you don’t choose love. Love chooses you. All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing, then reach out and give it away.
Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem it poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in anyway you can. There is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love, they understand love only as a need. They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love, and they begin to look at love as something that flows to them rather than from them.
The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing, but as their love cools, they revert to seeing their love as need. They cease to be someone who generates love and instead become someone who seeks love.
They forget that the secret of love is that it is a gift, and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away.
Remember this, and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time, its own seasons, and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into saying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you. But if it chooses to leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover, there is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do.
Love has always been and will always be a mystery. Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life.
Posted in Blogs.
– February 13, 2009
LESSON FOR LOVERS
10th Grade:-
As I sat there in English class,
I stared at the girl next to me.
She was my so called ‘best friend’.
I stared at her long, silky hair,
and wished she was mine.
But she didn’t notice me like that,
and I knew it.
After class,
she walked up to me and asked me for
the notes she had missed the day before.
I handed them to her.She said ‘thanks’
and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
I want to tell her, I want her to know
that I don’t want to be just friends,
I love her but I’m just too shy,
and I don’t know why.
11th grade:-
The phone rang. On the other end,
it was her. She was in tears,; mumbling on and on about how
her love had broke her heart.
She asked me to come over
because she didn’t want to be alone, So I did.
As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her
soft eyes, wishing she was mine.
After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie,
and three bags of chips,
she decided to go home.
She looked at me, said ‘thanks’
and gave me a kiss
on the cheek..I want to tell her,
I want her to know that
I don’t want to be just friends,
I love her but I’m just too shy,
and I don’t know why.
Senior year:-
One fine day she walked to my locker.
‘My date is sick’ she said,
‘hes not gonna go’ well,
I didn’t have a date, and in 7th grade,
we made a promise that
if neither of us had dates,
we would go together just as ‘best friends’.
So we did.
That night, after everything was over,
I was standing at her front door step.
I stared at her as She smiled at me
and stared at me with her crystal eyes.
Then she said- ‘I had the best time, thanks!’
and gave me a kiss on the cheek.; I want to tell her,
I want her to know
that I don’t want to be just friends,
I love her but I’m just too shy,
and I don’t know why.
Graduation:-
A day passed, then a week, then a month.
Before I could blink, it was graduation day.
I watched as her perfect body
floated like an angel
up on stage to get her diploma.
I wanted her to be mine-but
she didn’t notice me like that, and I knew it.
Before everyone went home,
she came to me in her smock and hat,
and cried as I hugged her.
Then she lifted her head from my shoulder
and said- ‘you’re my best friend,
thanks’ and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
I want to tell her,
I want her to know
that I don’t want to be just friends,
I love her but I’m just too shy,
and I don’t know why.
Marriage:-
Now I sit in the pews of the church.
That girl is getting married now.
and drive off to her new life,
married to another man.
I wanted her to be mine,
but she didn’t see me like that,
and I knew it.
But before she drove away,
she came to me and said ‘you came !’.
She said ‘thanks’ and kissed me on the cheek.
I want to tell her,
I want her to know
that I don’t want to be just friends,
I love her but I’m just too shy,
and I don’t know why.
Death:-
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin
of a girl who used to be my ‘best friend’.
At the service, they read a diary entry
she had wrote in her high school years.
This is what it read:
‘I stare at him wishing he was mine,
but he doesn’t notice me like that,
and I know it.
I want to tell him,
I want him to know that
I don’t want to be just friends,
I love him but I’m just too shy,
and I don’t know why.
I wish he would tell me he loved me !
………’I wish I did too…’
I thought to my self, and I cried.
HOPE ALL THE LOVERS WILL LEARN A LESSON FROM THIS STORY…
Posted in Blogs.
– February 13, 2009
my friend
We met upon the internet
Our keyboards as our voice
Monitors as our eyes
We fell in love by choice
The days and weeks since we’ve met
Have gone bye very fast
One click upon a button
And there I am with you
To see your name upon my screen
Does give me such a thrill
And when you send your
Our keyboards as our voice
Monitors as our eyes
We fell in love by choice
The days and weeks since we’ve met
Have gone bye very fast
One click upon a button
And there I am with you
To see your name upon my screen
Does give me such a thrill
And when you send your
Hey darling Angel
It makes my heart stand still
the little things you say and do
those smiles and hearts you seem
you have come to me
so much to me
Posted in Blogs.
– February 4, 2009
