I was jus wonderin… wat do i do hmmm its 12.00 am.. mum n sis r sleeping..n its raining out here,paa is out of town, and i am nt gettin a wink of sleep…. i badly need a hair cut, talk of hair.. m losin them all.. gosh one fine day… i wake up to see myself bald… eeks.. its nt a gud one to imagine either, i ve gotta do smethin about it., rain s stopped.. but still drizzlin.. i remember my childhood days wen me n my sis used to leave paper boats and watch them glide thro’ the little stream .. gosh..i miss those days.. wearin my yellow raincoat and yet drenched ,we wud be happy to go to school.. but nw,, i rather nt step out..it stinks.. wonder how cme it never mattered those days he he he.. if i did get one wish .. i did wish to be a child again.. and so wud every one else. The Year’ s gonna end.. and i ve decided to do smethings… wonder if i d follow them, looking back on all those days at office.. i ve feel blessed.. i did have a wonderful time. I am looking for another venture.. ,yesterday was my last day at office. Changes have become a part of my life and, am lookin forward to spend a wonderful christmas at my home. The rain has finally stopped…..
boring day—– bugged at off—– playin mine sweeper.—- broke the previous hour record!—- mom s aaloo paratha saved d lunch—– missed lubz badly!—- thought it was saturday till 3 n evenin( hw dumb… I know)—- felt like hittin the beach—- cudnt do so—– badly want a breakkkkkkkkkkkk.—– all green meadows..n ponds…. n … nature n me—- too good to be a dream—- tired of mornin traffic——– saro’s tea…s gettin worse day by day—-i dnt like the rain anymore… it stinks.—- niv n me went for shoppin—- sundays plan yet to be drafted!—– Stopped praying—- wonder wher am headin!…. No idea Sir ji! —— another month n a half for the xamz..——- m dead!— Congrats to Sri n Kar , their weddin s tommorro! missed the fun—–lifeeeeeeeeeeeeee s damn…. cant fugure wat to say…—- m goin for a walk—- i mite return or maybe jus hit bed! —- hw borin!.. ANOTHER BORIN DAY TOMMORRW~… SO SICK N TIRED.. …
Happy Birthday Appa! It’s ur day!. life s been a long memorable journey for you.. and for all the up s n downs n life and for the bold steps u ve made at any point… Dad U re d BEST!… i knw i ve hurt you a lot at times.., but u never said a word tat wud hurt me! From the time i knew.. some one else had a bigger share to celeberate the day i was.. born.. !.. Appa it has to be U! I am so lucky to have born on your birthday pa. U never made a fuss that it was your birthday.. and made sure it was alwez about me.. and u alwez did and u did that again today!…Appa i ve never bothered to gift you all these years.. It dint strike me at all.. I ve been so selfish! i wanna gift you smethin you d like,,on this day, hope u like it Pa. I wud make sure , that i d listen to u from now on, and as a gud start.. m gonna complete my assignments tomorrow, i knw u ve been cribbing about them and u re worried. But this time i, d get it done on time! Its such a happy feeling tat we both share our Birthdays and i thank YOU APPA for that. On this day of Urs.. i wanna wish you the best of health and loads of gud wishes in the years to come ahead! Appa i want you to keep fussing over me.. and i dont want you to stop. and i all alwez keep chances open to fite and argue.. U re my Best Critic and i alwez want you to hold my hand and never let it go.. the way u used to take me to school and keep calling wen i dont answer the call! M Alwez your little gal Pa.
Dear Appa, you're like the sun to me, a sure thing, always there, beaming light and warmth on my life. Whatever is good in me today, I owe to your wisdom, your patience, your strength, your love. You taught me by example, as a role model, how to be my own person, how to believe in myself, instructing me without controlling me. Even when we disagreed, you held us together, so our bond was never broken. I understand what you did for me, and I am so grateful that I have you as my solid foundation, my rock. I respect you, I admire you, I love you, my guiding light, my Appa.
The other day, while cleanin my room… i found this book on Linda Goodman ’s Sunsigns.. i guess every one s quite familiar with this name for those of your.. who aren’t aware..( she s supposed to be the big daddie in astrology or sunsigns.) I am not a person , who keeps track.. of my fren’s bdays.. neither do i know ther sunsigns. But.. wen i took hold of this book, i was jus curious enough to know …. if my fren’s characters.. match with those given in the book… (actually i was quite jobless so… dint get a better book to read) so my magical journey into this crap book… started from yesterday nite.. and trust me am.. still glued to it. It seems so real.. atleast to a certain extent tat , my belief in these sun signs have goneeeeeee up ! To my astonishment.. most of my frens, are virgo’s n gemini… and there s one saggi… and yeah m a libran, and wat ever qualities the book sez.. abt that specified sun sign,… i cant deny the fact. They seem to be true. i ve alwez hated to say that m a libran.. but now.. i dnt regret tat much…. i knw.. its sound crap.. atleast tat wat my frens say so… the this book s a complete shit! i hate to disagree wid them… i mean..look at all those nice things she said about how librans.. are.. charming.. ( which undoubtedly i am)… balanced ( the other word for being like a cat on d wall..) persuvasive, outgoing.. a bit shy… and lots of attitiude.. ( tat s a little too much) and yeah being emotional.. heart oriented.. ( very true.. ppl take loads of advantage of that…and i hate tat!) looking at the negative things.. i.. care a damn.. cos i dnt agree wid any of those..statements. ! hmmm … oke.. but one thing i wud give agree to is the TEMPER! but tat tooo it s jus.. .00000000000005% … so i dnt think its bad. I mean after reading through.. i kindda feel gud abt myself.. or shud i say.. i got to knw myself a better.. nt that.. i believe everythin,,, but in some way, i cud relate to most of the things… And added to all this.. I Share my birthday month wid some of the most famous celebrity librans.. kate winslet, catherine zeta- jones, eleanor roosevelt, susan sarandon( the actress from step mom) , john lennon from beetles.. our own annie besant,.. bollywood stars like kajol.. hema malini.. evergreen dev anand.. sizzling rekha.. and the father of our Nation.. Our own Bappu.. MK Gandhi. and i also came to knw.. that APJ Abdul kalam.. our former president.. hope my .. GK s nt tat bad.. his bday falls on the same day as mine.! Now thats smthing i been,…. crappin frm the mrning to all my frenz… they are done wid my blabbering.. and ..i think.. i shud stop.. .. dont u think so??
It’s been a really long time.. since i actually blogged… nothing seez to creep into my mind… tho’ deliberately i ‘ ve avoided bloggin for a while, no one seems to be affected badly by my absence.. or did i think so in my wildest dreamz.. tat sme one wud miss me.. newez too gud to be a dream tho’. Hmmmm.. well, m bac to crappin all thoughts , tat enter the complicated network of my brain! lets cccc.. wher do i start from… yeahhhhhhh ..this one wud be gud… my best fren left to Kuwait… to join her hubby, we gave her a splendid farewell or so did i think….. tho’ it was a disaster we shudnt have tried our hands at cooking.. i regret tat deeply.. sorry jassu !( she loves dis chick pea soup.. her fave being brownie wid hot chocolate sauce… and u know wat we did.. story to be concluded later!).. well d next un-expected thing tat happened.. was… Jorn( u mite be thinkin who jorn is..well he s the tallest of all my fren’s.. loves basket ball.. is a party freak.. he s d oxford dictionary for most of us!) lost his dad.. he is’nt his usual self now…. I jus hope things get better wid him…. ! Lubz ( she s a living teddy bear.. i mean literally) s finally bac frm sydney.. goddddd she s gone totally nuts over tat place.. u cant stand her.. cribbings. abt being bac n India! If any one of you, are plannin to go to Australia.. pleassssssssse… take her wid u!. hey ppl did i tell u abt the one legged crow.. u dnt believe me.. rite.. fine dnt.. believe! off late, i ve taken a likin to dogs.. hmmm but guess amma wont allow.. already she s suffering wid me.. poor thing.. why trouble her! but definitely .. i am plannin to get a dog.. jus like pug.. the hutch dog.. ohhh my god that little devil luks so cute… wish i cud just plunge into the tv screen n get it. Life s still d same.. except tat am gettin old…. the other day i dreamt of havin a grey hair.. god.. not so soon!.. plsss. There s one gud newz.. the writing bug has caught my dad too.. so i guess he ‘d be bloggin soon, i guess then all s well here.. ..or atleast i think so.. the world at rediff iland hardly seems to be un affected.. it s still d same.. warm place.. for me. I once thought of quittin and leavin it.. but am wrong… i jus cant do tat.. it jus seems impossible..may be all i needed was sme hibernation.. which am thro’ wid.. and i shud be bac again this time.. wid a Bang!… wid more posts and yeah …. hope my second innings are off to a good start………………. well time to move on for a great week ahead!…
“Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not on this earth for eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand and melting like a snowflake.”
I’m ready to believe No more people who deceive It’s his time to take the stage It’s our time to turn the page I don’t want to be feeling sad I don’t want to be feeling bad Give us one good man Who says yes Yes we can !
They say he must wait his turn They say too much to learn They say he should stand in line It’s their plan, not mine They say it’s a fairy tale They say rolling dice can only fail They say it will fall apart He alone speaks from my heart Can we see the future and not the past? Yes we can ! Can we come together and make a change? Yes we can ! Can we really believe again? Yes we can !
We say, now is the time We say, this is the plan We say, it takes one good man
Well.. its 3:43 am on the clock… and m all jus wide awake, knwing nt wat to do.. felt i shud scribble smethin in the middle of ( gonna be sunrise soon) .. wee hours! my mind s totally blank nw.. i ve never stayed awake for this long… last time..i actually was awake the whole nite was durin my thesis day.. and its been a year and a half frm then… At this point of time..i feel at total peace with myself..ready to forgive myself for that i ve been thro d day.. life seems so strange at times.. d things once u desired.. are nw of no more interest.. i alwez wanted an Ipod.. and i got it.. but i dnt use it much often… the desire s jus no more.. i ve alwez wanted to be surrounded with frenz and ppl.. but off late..i prefer being alone.. its jus tat, i find sme kind of peace.. tat solitude…tat lonliness.. the silence that evokes all mist feelings.. s a kind of stress buster to me.. i dnt knw hw far it works wid others. Offlate i wanted to do things which i have alwez kept away frm doing.. for many reasons, my mind s like one junkyard filled wid so many unexplored paths ,,,, sme hesitation to accept reality .. its an illusion to sme, maybe.. but the truth is… hw many of us have tried to satisfy our soul..rather than doin satisfyin our egos! smetimes..m nt true to myself, why do i have to convince myself….harsh reality smtimes plays deadlly wid our lives tat the mask may have to worn thro out the life… hw i wish, i cud be a child again, careless and yet free like a bird , wid dreams and hopes of a never endin fairy tale. i used to literally believe in santa claus.. till my sixth grade, and all about tat fairy..who gives money for broken teeth kept under ur pillow. wen i think of them nw.. its almost a trip down the child hood lane. well being an adult, given its adavantages.. the life i lead s almost stressing me out.. deadlines.. politics… corrupt.. and i cant jus run away like tat..and i held myself responsible for such a life. i knw wat it takes to turn around TO A BETTER LIFE..and M GONNA DO IT CAUSE M WORTH IT! its 4:14.am nw.. guess m nt gonna sleep.. m already feelin on a high jus by thinking of a new day ahead of me.. and m gonna live it to the fullest! no matter wat.. itz ma life. well most of the people must have gone thro situations..wher you feel the need to change and rite nw m goin thro those phases… m nt tat practical wid my thoughts, coz i dream a lot..the transition may be a temporary phase but m looking forward to a being a better person at soul and heart and most of all being true to myself and to trust myself , i definitely wanna lead a holistic living at the end of the day! m rite nw lisenin to DiDO s… the best day of my life and.. it seems so true…
My tea’s gone cold, I’m wondering why I got out of bed at all
the morning rain clouds up my window and I can’t see at all
And even if I could it’d all be grey, but your picture on my wall
it reminds me that it’s not so bad
it’s not so bad
I drank too much last night, got bills to pay
my head just feels in pain
I missed the bus and there’ll be hell today
I’m late for work again
and even if I’m there, they’ll all imply that I might not last the day
and then you call me and it’s not so bad
it’s not so bad and
God I want to thank you for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you is having the best day of my life
Push the door, I’m home at last and I’m soaking through and through
then you handed me a towel and all I see is you
and even if my house falls down now, I wouldn’t have a clue
because you’re near me and
God I want to thank you for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you is having the best day of my life
Time machine! Yes if some "Einstein" or" Wright bros or sme geeky heads had invented it, life wud have been much easier. I have alwez ended up making a mess of sme thing or the other, but yeah every one makes mistakes. Not tat we all were designed to commit mistakes… It jus happens… jus like tat! Hw simple cud tat be, I agree sme wrong moves may get us floored but… why do we try to run away or hide behind the curtains till everything becomes normal… its nothing like owning up for your own crime, but hw bad can it get, when u still feel happy for all that messed up knots in your life. Trust me life can still be a zingalala if u jus dust it off your feet. Everyone likes to be perfect and none likes to lose even if it s a fair deal… I am sick of hearing statements such as… "don't worry" there s alwez d next time" be a good sport". come on, I believe u either make your destiny or make a flop show, you alone are responsible for the things that happen around you and its understood that, nothing can be done to the damage. You alwez get it rite the first time, if not, then it s not your cup, maybe you wud, if u keep trying, TRY AND TRY UNTIL YOU SUCCEED! M sure in this buzz buzz world, none has d time to stop by and what are we gonna prove by trying, tat we are better than them! When you are aware of your worth and if it's the only thing u have ever wanted in your life, hw can u ever go wrong, I mean hw… why…all these questions pop up, d moment u get sandwiched! I think it's completely aright to lose and vent out your anger even if it doesn't make much sense, scared that you mite being an easy target to criticism. But that's much better, rather than blaming some one else for your wrong move. I don't want to be called a goodie goodie gal and regret for anything I have done. To every action there s alwez an equal and opposite reaction. Being happy and smiling alwez doesn't get you around, at times you have to put your foot down in that puddle of dirty mud, cuz none has the rite to threaten your existence , your actions, and your motives as long as you don't give up on yourself. There wud be times , when close ones around you walk out of your life and your are all left alone, with none to share and cry a tear. Cry if you must, you still have your soul deep inside voicing out and comforting you, tat you are never alone. Life s like a stream, with lots of impurities some get dissolved… some get left behind some still move on and the path they travel can be on sme rocky cliff or a thorny bush, but it s least bothered about what it has gone through and is still treading at its very best if only those around us realize that, m sure having a negative attitude does bring out positive changes in life.
Well.. its 3:43 am on the clock… and m all jus wide awake, knwing nt wat to do.. felt i shud scribble smethin in the middle of ( gonna be sunrise soon) .. wee hours! my mind s totally blank nw.. i ve never stayed awake for this long… last time..i actually was awake the whole nite was durin my thesis day.. and its been a year and a half frm then… At this point of time..i feel at total peace with myself..ready to forgive myself for that i ve been thro d day.. life seems so strange at times.. d things once u desired.. are nw of no more interest.. i alwez wanted an Ipod.. and i got it.. but i dnt use it much often… the desire s jus no more.. i ve alwez wanted to be surrounded with frenz and ppl.. but off late..i prefer being alone.. its jus tat, i find sme kind of peace.. tat solitude…tat lonliness.. the silence that evokes all mist feelings.. s a kind of stress buster to me.. i dnt knw hw far it works wid others. Offlate i wanted to do things which i have alwez kept away frm doing.. for many reasons, my mind s like one junkyard filled wid so many unexplored paths ,,,, sme hesitation to accept reality .. its an illusion to sme, maybe.. but the truth is… hw many of us have tried to satisfy our soul..rather than doin satisfyin our egos! smetimes..m nt true to myself, why do i have to convince myself….harsh reality smtimes plays deadlly wid our lives tat the mask may have to worn thro out the life… hw i wish, i cud be a child again, careless and yet free like a bird , wid dreams and hopes of a never endin fairy tale. i used to literally believe in santa claus.. till my sixth grade, and all about tat fairy..who gives money for broken teeth kept under ur pillow. wen i think of them nw.. its almost a trip down the child hood lane. well being an adult, given its adavantages.. the life i lead s almost stressing me out.. deadlines.. politics… corrupt.. and i cant jus run away like tat..and i held myself responsible for such a life. i knw wat it takes to turn around TO A BETTER LIFE..and M GONNA DO IT CAUSE M WORTH IT! its 4:14.am nw.. guess m nt gonna sleep.. m already feelin on a high jus by thinking of a new day ahead of me.. and m gonna live it to the fullest! no matter wat.. itz ma life. well most of the people must have gone thro situations..wher you feel the need to change and rite nw m goin thro those phases… m nt tat practical wid my thoughts, coz i dream a lot..the transition may be a temporary phase but m looking forward to a being a better person at soul and heart and most of all being true to myself and to trust myself , i definitely wanna lead a holistic living at the end of the day! m rite nw lisenin to DiDO s… the best day of my life and.. it seems so true…
