Back to Square one

Haaa….

It feels gud to come back again on blog…..


Let  c how this new come back goes fr me…


Jokes

 

Note : My Intention is not to offend any one. I apologise if anyone find it offensive. My intention is just to create some light moments of laughter.

 

 

Prince Charles & Sardarji were having dinner.

Prince said, “Pass the wine you divine”.

Sardar thinks “how poetic”

Sardar says, “pass the custard you bastard”.

***********************************************

Sardar at bar in New York.

Man on his right says “Johny Walker single”

Man on his left says “Peter Scotch single”

Sardar says - “Baljith Singh Married”

***********************************************

Boss : am giving u job as a driver. STARTING salary Rs.2000/-, is it o.k

Sardar : U R great sir! Starting salary is o.k…….but??

how much is DRIVING salary…?

***********************************************

Sardar’s theory : Moon is more impt than Sun, coz it gives light at

night when light is needed & Sun gives light during the day when light

is not needed!!!

***********************************************

2 sardars are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the

other to check whether its working, he puts his head out and says

YES…NO…YES…NO…YES…NO…

***********************************************

Sardar shouting 2 his girl friend ” u said v will do register marriage

and cheated me, I was waiting 4 u yesterday whole day in the post

office….

****************************** *****************

Sardar is in a dissection class of cockroach. He cuts its 1 leg, and

says, “chal”, it walks.

He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, “chal” , it walks.

He cuts all the legs and said, “chal….” Finally he wrote the conclusion……

…… “after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it becomes deaf……”

***********************************************

A Tamilian call up sardar and asks ” tamil therima??”

Sardar got mad, angrily replied…. “Hindi tera baap!!!”

***********************************************

2 sardarjis looking at Egyptian mummy.

Sar 1 : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.

Sar 2 : Aaho, lorry number is also written…BC 1760!!!….

***********************************************

A sardar on an interview 4 da post detective.

Interviewer : who killed Gandhi?

Sardar : Thank u sir 4 giving me d job, I will start investigating…….

***********************************************

A sardar for an exam had studied only one essay ‘FRIEND’, but in the

exam the essay which came was ‘FATHER’ . he replaced friend with father

in the essay and>it read: AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF FATHERS,

SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUE

FATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR.

***********************************************

Interviewar: what s ur qualification?

Sardarji : Sir I am Ph.d.

Interviewar : what do u mean by Ph.d?

Sardarji : (smiling) PASSED HIGHSCHOOL with DIFFICULTY….

***********************************************

Amitab in KBC: In which state Cauvery flows?

Sardar : liquid state…..

Audience clapped.. Amitab stunned, looks behind, ALL WERE SARDARS……

 


Good one to enjoy




Hey friends I just received an e-mail from a friend thought to share it with you all…its really a nice one…so..enjoy…


भैंस चालीसा
महामूर्ख दरबार में, लगा अनोखा केस
फसा हुआ है मामला, अक्ल बङी या भैंस
अक्ल बङी या भैंस, दलीलें बहुत सी आयीं
महामूर्ख दरबार की अब,देखो सुनवाई
मंगल भवन अमंगल हारी- भैंस सदा ही अकल पे भारी
भैंस मेरी जब चर आये चारा- पाँच सेर हम दूध निकारा
कोई अकल ना यह कर पावे- चारा खा कर दूध बनावे
अक्ल घास जब चरने जाये- हार जाय नर अति दुख पाये
भैंस का चारा लालू खायो- निज घरवारि सी.एम. बनवायो
तुमहू भैंस का चारा खाओ- बीवी को सी.एम. बनवाओ
मोटी अकल मन्दमति होई- मोटी भैंस दूध अति होई
अकल इश्क़ कर कर के रोये- भैंस का कोई बाँयफ्रेन्ड ना होये
अकल तो ले मोबाइल घूमे- एस.एम.एस. पा पा के झूमे
भैंस मेरी डायरेक्ट पुकारे- कबहूँ मिस्ड काल ना मारे
भैंस कभी सिगरेट ना पीती- भैंस बिना दारू के जीती
भैंस कभी ना पान चबाये - ना ही इसको ड्रग्स सुहाये
शक्तिशालिनी शाकाहारी- भैंस हमारी कितनी प्यारी
अकलमन्द को कोई ना जाने- भैंस को सारा जग पहचाने
जाकी अकल मे गोबर होये- सो इन्सान पटक सर रोये
मंगल भवन अमंगल हारी- भैंस का गोबर अकल पे भारी
भैंस मरे तो बनते जूते- अकल मरे तो पङते जूते
So now you can decide
अक्ल बङी या भैंस


Mirza Ghalib -2

aashiqee sabr talab aur tamanna betaab
dil ka kya rang karooN KHoon-e-jigar hone tak ?

[ sabr = patience, talab = search ]



partav-e-khur se hai shabnam ko fana’a ki taaleem
maiN bhee hooN ik inaayat ki nazar hone tak

[ partav-e-khur = sun's reflection/light/image, shabnam = dew,
fana'a = mortality, inaayat = favour ]



yak_nazar besh naheeN fursat-e-hastee GHaafil
garmi-e-bazm hai ik raqs-e-sharar hone tak

[ besh = too much/lots, fursat-e-hastee = duration of life,
GHaafil = careless, raqs = dance, sharar = flash/fire ]



GHam-e-hastee ka ‘Asad’ kis’se ho juz marg ilaaz
shamma’a har rang meiN jaltee hai sahar hone tak

[ hastee = life/existence, juz = other than, marg = death,
sahar = morning ]




‘Arz-e-niyaaz-e-ishq ke qaabil naheeN raha
jis dil pe naaz tha mujhe wo dil naheeN raha


[ niyaaz = desire/an offering ]


Mirza Ghalib

 



 



 



 



 



 



 



 



 



Hi friends,,



starting a new thread on write ups of Mirza Asadullah Khan “Ghalib” Saab..He’s  great poet and many of will still be great fan of Ghalib Saab.



 



“ham ne maana ke taGHaful na karoge, lekin
KHaak ho jaayeNge ham tumko KHabar hone tak”

[ taGHaful = neglect/ignore ]



 


Aah ko chaahiye ik ‘umr asar hone tak
kaun jeeta hai teree zulf ke sar hone tak ?



 



 



 


A Beautiful Dream

Hi,


Friends ultimately i am able to write a poem for the picture i have choosen….hope u guys/gals will like it…



Kal raat maine swapan main, dekha jo unko pass se !


Khushian bahare chaa gayi, unke isi ahsaas se !!



Boli wo dheere se magar, kaano main aake pyar se !


Aayi hu priyatam aaj main, prem ke vishwaas se !!



Aalingan main le kar use, baitha main yamuna teer pe !


Hridaya hilore lene laga, prem ki barsaat me !!



Kapkapate hotho se, kahna ki priya tum jaan ho !


Nashwar hai ye sharir, aur tum uske praan ho !!



Tum he jeewan tum kutumb aur tum sansaar ho !


Dhanaya hai jeewan agar tum priya mere saath ho !!




HOMOSEXUALITY VS GOVT

 


Last week was day of celebration for some and for other's day of protest. I am talking about recent HC judgment on decriminalizing homosexuality between adult consenting partners. This issue has raised many questions but I'll limit it to two main issues in my blog. .


 


1.    DO WE REALLY NEED SECTION 377 TO CHANGE: - I guess yes as my right to freedom gives me the authority to choose my partner. Also in all circumstances our constitution is supreme and no law can replace it so section 377 which punishes gay couples needs to be strike out or modified. Well let's not involve ourselves into legality of how and when this will be done.


 


But by changing a law will change the mindset of society? Will it change their attitude? or Will it change the attitude of family towards gay couple? It still considered as a disease. Still we need to go miles and it'll take years to change the mindset of people, family and society at large.


 


Accept it or not homosexuality exists in India from ancient time. People were hesitant to accept the fact that they feel attracted towards the same sex. Now its possible that they come out in public and accept it.


 


In any case HC decision is a welcome change.


 


2.    WHAT PURPOSE DOES IT SERVE: - Presuming Gay Marriages are allowed and not punishable in years to come in India. Then what purpose will it serve? Will they ever be able to live a normal life with kids and family around? I guess not, ultimately one partner has to change their sex to have kids or to adopt someone.


Okay I agree that marriage doesn't mean sex and children alone but one wants more from marriage than sex & children like understanding, security, long live relations, companionship and more. Still gay marriages are something unnatural, I mean we are made in a way to complement our opposite sex and allowing marriages in same sex is not only against law of nature but will create imbalance too.


 


 


To sum up one should do which keeps them happy and satisfies their needs and give them freedom without hurting the sentiments of others especially family. I feel one should enjoy the life without thinking whether they are homosexual or heterosexual. All what matter is that you are happy with your partner.


Mr FM are you following Gandhiji's 3 moneky rules :-

As a matter of fact no govt can run without money so same is true for Indian Govt as well.


It need revenue, it requires money to look after the country. A major portion of of such revenue comes from taxes known to us as Income Tax, Sales Tax, Excise & Custom Duty and Service tax.


 


Many of those working would be very familiar with these taxes but interesting point is whatever we earn almost 50% goes as taxes. In other words whatever govt does for our welfare involve 50% of our hard earned income.


 


As I said our own contribution to social welfare involves our own 50% so govt is accountable to general public for spending these revenue. Am I right ?


 


Ok now lets have a look what actually govt is doing.


 




  1. Ms Mayawati spends Rs 2000 crore on building her own monuments. Great I loved the way she does this. Hats off to her. She's in power. We elected her and now we are paying the price. No regrets we born fool.


  2. MCD is having 45000 fake workforce amounting to Rs 300 crore annually. Great, Our honorable govt have the agenda for employment to all no matter whether those employed existed or not but we'll give them the jobs and ofcourse the money.


  3. Money deposited in Swiss bank by Indian is Rs 60 lac crore. Can anyone tell me how many zeros are there..puff still sweating

 


These are just the examples how good govt is in spending tax payer's money.


 


I hope Mr FM will be reading my post (wishful thinking). Doesn't he thinks that all state govt should report to him which involves money. Doesn't he think all those corrupt official must be kicked out from their department. Doesn't he think why only govt companies are in loss. Doesn't he think that he should use tax payer money more wisely as his own. I guess not and see what he does to overcome with losses. Increase in Petrol by Rs 4/- & Rs 2/- in diesel. You are such a genius Mr FM and very visionary and quite aware that no matter what govt does but to cope up with losses you can increase the taxes at his will. That's the tool available in his hand and surely he's using it very wisely. But what I amazed is the justification for this increase that " Our inflation is in 've percentage so any such hike will not effect inflation much". Wow wt a great justification. He surely know that he's leading the fools and to an extent we are. Can anyone tell me what's inflation and how govt comes with a 've % of inflation. Still prices of everything raised to sky but he cant see that because inflatioion is 've. Increase in petrol prices will not affect a common man because inflation will still be in control. And don't worry new budget is supposed to come in 1st week of july and you can expect many more taxes as this will affect only the common man and hey why I am worried inflation is 've so cheeres ..


 


I would feel proud if he announces or ensure


 




  1. All govt companies working in loss for past 5 yrs to be sold off.


  2. Six Sigma tactics to used in govt companies to check on overstaffing.


  3. State should start sharing 10% of their total revenue with central instead of asking more money from govt.


  4. Hiring pvt sector talent for turnaround of sick companies.


  5. As 80% of our GDP comes from Agriculture he should use this sector so that atlease we need not to import foods and grains if not exported.


  6. Can we have our swiss bank deposit back soon.


  7. Can he show some mercy on taxpayers like me by giving relexation.


  8. Above all he must start thinking out of box.

 


 


Lets hope he'll do some good for common man if not than at least by not increasing our existing tax burden.


Growing India ?

 We always blame government for not doing anything for common man. To an extent this is true keeping in mind the prevailing corruption in country. And Its government who is representative of common man so they have not only the expectation but also the duty to deliver.

 

Today we proudly say that India is one of the fast growing economies. Yes we are growing. Poverty, Illiteracy, Unemployment, Barbarism for religion is there and growing rapidly. What happen in Godhra is truly a shameless incident. Today we are crying for beating of Indians in Australia but what MNS did in Maharashtra is not very different.

 

It's high time when government intervention is required and politician must rise to the occasion. But what they are supposed to do and what they are supposed to deliver.

 

I have following suggestions for them,

 

  1. Education for All :- Government must ensure education upto 12th and not just the basic education. Basic education means very little when you go to any rural area. They want food and surety for their survival. So their education should ensure employment for them.
  2. Employment for All :-  Government should create enough employment for youth of India. Participation from NGO's and private sector will help a lot.
  3. Unique ID :- A smart card carrying unique ID of individual Indian. So that we can start saying that we are Indian than Hindu, Muslim, Sikh etc etc. This card should contain Individual name , Address, Date of Birth, Contact No, Pan No, Passport No, Driving License, Any offence committed, if any. Just think how helpful this card will be for a common man.
  4. Corruption :- This is one area where I am clueless what to do. I think so long manual paper work is there nothing can be done so only solution which seems possible to me is to make all government departments online. Also every corrupt officer instead of transfer or suspension should be fired. Also the person giving bribe should also be punished.
  5. Dependency on Agriculture :- Till date 80% of our GDP comes from Agriculture and rest from service Industries and Manufacturing Sector . Still we are not able to provide food for all. We need to shift from Agriculture to Manufacturing for better growth.
  6. Quota System :- I believe quota systems must be removed from all areas. This is one of the major cause of religion related fights. Rather a full support to those who are needy should be provided irrespective of the category i.e. general, OBC, SC/ST be it in education or in employment. RIGHT PERSON FOR THE RIGHT JOB. If government is able to remove quota and start support systems as I suggested above then the same can be made compulsory for private sector e.g. 10% reservation of jobs for Needy ( may be a certificate from govt as privilege Card can be given to those who are needy ).
  7. Control on Government Expenditure :- We spent a lot on expenditure of our ministers specially for their medical treatment and foreign travel. It's totally a waste of money when good specialists in India are available. A watch dog is required to control all these unnecessary expenditure which can easily be controlled. After all its hard earned taxpayer money which should be utilized for social welfare.

 

This list seems to be endless I'll try to continue it in my coming blogs and will cover some other suggestion.

 

Waiting for your valuable comments and hey don't forget to provide title to my last blog.


GIVE A NAME OR TITLE