11.00 pm:-

It was the Sunday night. Tomorrow was a big day. I had a meeting my client. And I had to be prepared and be fresh tomorrow. So I thought it would be better if I went to sleep today a little early. A good 8 hour sleep was what I needed. A wedding was going on in the neighborhood. There was enough noise outside. But I thought it would end soon. I mean how long can they play, right?

12.00 am:-

I was lying down on my bed. I had closed my eyes for some time now. But the loud noise outside was disturbing me. It's been an hour and they showed no signs of stopping. Maybe they would stop now. I looked at my watch. It was 12. 'Midnight!!' I thought. Ok. Maybe a 7 hour sleep will still keep me fresh. I closed my eyes again. Get some good thoughts inside. It will help me sleep.

1.00 am:-

The music had stopped now. It's been half hour since then. I was trying hard to sleep. But sleep was avoiding me. Come on man try to sleep. My stomach gave a light rumble. Hungry so soon!!! I just had a complete meal. How can I be hungry so soon??? Just ignore it. Try to sleep. My noise gave a light twitch. It was cold outside because of he rain. I was getting a cold. And my nose gets hypersensitive. And I have a sneezing bout before having a full fledged cold. And I thought the sneezing would start now. Come on now .ignore it .try to sleep .good thoughts good thoughts .!!! Where are my good thoughts!!!!

2.00 am:-

Suddenly I sneezed hard. It was so sudden that I was practically thrown off my little sofa cum bed! One note to readers, when I start to sneeze I keep on sneezing for about an hour or so. It's like a sneeze attack. My nose goes on war with the cold germ inside. So one sneeze invited the other one and the other one invited the third one and so on!!!

I kept on sneezing. I couldn't keep sneezing anymore!! I blocked my nose. I held hard with my hand. And tried my level best to block the sneeze. After about a couple of anxious moments I thought I succeeded!!!! Whew!!! Thank god!! What was the time now?? Two o clock..!!!! And I hadn't slept a wink!!! Good God!! My meeting!!! How will I attend it?? I had to sleep!! So forcibly, with a light running and sensitive nose I dropped on my bed. I was tired. So sleep would come soon now!!! My stomach gave a rumble again. It was stronger then the last one. I was getting hungry. No matter, if I get to sleep, I would be fine. So sleep my dear, I thought!!!!

3.00 am

My stomach was grumbling now. I sat in despair. I was hungry. I had to eat something. So what was there in the kitchen?? I went there and the only thing that made sense was biscuits. I took the biscuits quickly chewed them. My mouth ran dry. I took some water. After about gulping down 6 or more biscuits, I thought it would be enough. I had drunk water again. So now I was ready to sleep. My nose was quiet. And all was peace in my nose. No war inside, I thought. I carelessly glanced at my clock. It was blinking 3 o clock!!! I sighed!! What a night, I thought!!! I went to my little bed and literally dropped down.

4.00 am

My eyes were closed. I thought this was sleep. Maybe I was dreaming that I was awake, I thought. Hmmm, if that were true then, if I tried to open my eyes they shouldn't open, I reasoned!!! Wow, I can reason and sense logic even in my sleep, I must be smart, I thought. So I tried to open my eyes to prove that I was sleeping and I was dreaming. But then my eyes opened. I wasn't sleeping at all. I wasn't dreaming. I was still awake. A light groan passed between my lips. Why can't I sleep today?? My meeting I had to attend!!! Please, I prayed to god, give me some sleep!!!!

5.00 am

Nature called. Too much water with biscuits, I thought. How can you ignore nature?? I had given up hope. Sleep was a distant dream to me. It was 5, in the morning. People wake up now. And I hadn't slept!! What an unfortunate wreck I was!! So I attended nature's call. I came out of the bathroom and jumped on my bed. It creaked loudly. And the one leg of the sofa cum bed broke. And it was now standing in a weird inclined angle. Frustration had set in now. I let out a shout. In the quiet morning, it sounded harsh and spine wrecking. I must have woken up a few neighbours. No need for alarms clock, I thought!! God was playing a cruel game with me.

6.00 am:-

I was sitting on my bed. It was still standing at the weird angle due to my jump. Birds were chirping outside. And the crows the bloody crows were shouting there asses off right outside my window. How can you sleep with all the commotion outside like that?? Shut up you crazy two winged chirping monsters!!! How can you chirp away so happily when I haven't slept a wink!!! I buried my face in my two hands and sighed heavily!!! So I had to go to office soon. I had to attend the meeting. I would be wreck in the meeting. God why me???? My stomach grumbled again. I was hungry. And what was wrong with my stomach. Why was it doing overtime today?? Why I was getting hungry so quickly?? Can't you stop digesting for sometime and take a break, you digestive freak!!!!! Bloody hell!!! I sighed again!!!

7.00 am:-

I left my house for my office. I was looking like a freak coming out of jail. But I had to go!! Somehow sleep had crept into my eyes!!! And eyes were heavy. I carried my heavy bag. Dragged it would be more appropriate. I walked.

 To office my friend!!! To office!!!!

Pho-Ding:-

Mrs. Bakshi, a grand mother of two beautiful children lived with her husband, their son, his wife and two kids. She lived with her family in Malda, which is in the state of West Bengal. A little to the northern side of WB. A quiet city compared to the busy capital of the state. She had been living there ever since her marriage. And she was in contempt with the place. Over a period of time she had learned to adjust with the slow life and was now in love with this place. She loved almost everything about this place. Their house was a little bungalow type, which was common to the area where she lived, was a beautiful thing to look at. Mr. Bakshi, her husband had built it and it was still the pride of the family, even after all these years.

It was the usual Saturday night. Every one was awake. Watching the T.V. Mrs. Bakshi along with her Daughter in law were in the kitchen finishing off with the dishes. Saturday night was always a little different from the other days because the next day being the Sunday, no one would be hurrying to sleep. Their neighborhood was a little outside the town, so it was all quiet and the houses were a little distant from each other. So the atmosphere was serene.

Suddenly the Door bell rang. Mrs. Bakshi was surprised. She quickly glanced at the watch. It showed 12.30 am.

'Who could be it now at this time of the night?' she thought. And she looked enquiringly at her daughter in law. She looked back quizzically.

The children and the Men in the house must have missed the ring due to the sound of the T.V., because no one responded.

She went to the door. She looked through the eye hole. She could not see anybody due to the darkness outside. Absent-mindedly she opened the door. She regretted her action the moment she had opened the door. She saw three young men standing in front of her. They were dressed in old clothes. There faces had a haggard look. They had not shaven for some time. Loose old formal pants with shirt staying out, and equipped with a pair of slippers on their feet, they looked a little innocent in the fluorescence light. The person in the front folded his hand to gesture a 'Namaste'.

"Namaste Auntyji. My name is Pho-Ding." He said in the most polite voice.

Mrs. Bakshi was in a confusion. She wanted to close the door immediately but she stood still. The fear in her was freezing her from inside. She had seen that they were carrying pistols in their hands.

 "What do you want??" Mrs. Bakshi asked apprehensively. A little tremble was evident in her voice now. She wanted desperately to warn her husband and son. But she kept staring at Pho-Ding. This guy had an hypnotic look. The eyes were big, brown and innocent.

'Such innocent eyes!!!!' she thought.

"We only want to rob this house. We don't want to trouble anybody. If you could please now let us in, we could start then with our work. We have to do this quickly as we are in a hurry." He said in a very warm voice and a nice smile. He had this little gun in his hand which made the point pretty clear. The situation was so unreal to Mrs. Bakshi.

They quickly came inside. Closed the door. And went inside. Every one in the house were startled at this. Pho-Ding and his men quickly put all the curtains on all the windows. Then they assembled all the house members in the house in one room. They asked the house members not to shout. And if they did, things would get very complicated, they said. No one in the house could utter a single word after that. They took all the cell phones and disconnected all the land phone lines.

"Auntyji, could you please tell us where all the money and the jewels are in the house. If you could tell us then it would save all the trouble for us to search the whole house. And our time would not be wasted." Pho-Ding asked Mrs. Bakshi ever so politely.

She had to answer. She gave all the information. And in a blink of an eye, the other two men moved quickly to the new found information. While Pho-Ding stood in front of them. The little smile was still visible in face. It seemed he was at content with what he was doing. He had no regrets or worry or anxiety.

Mrs. Bakshi was at awe. She looked at her family members. Every one was scared. The children were putting up a brave face. Her son was a little irritated and scared. The mixture of both emotions in his face gave out a weird sort of an expression. She hadn't noticed that before.

Then again she looked at Pho-Ding. He was still smiling. The other two persons were heard to knock off some furniture upstairs and then they were now hurrying down below. It seemed they had completed their work. Only 15 minutes had passed. They had done their job quickly. Pho-Ding's smile got bigger.

Mrs.Bakshi blurted out , "Do you want some tea???"

She couldn't believe it. She was offering tea to a complete stranger who was robbing them at midnight. But he is so polite!!!!! What an irony in the situation!!!!

What a weird situation!!!!

Pho-Ding looked at Mrs.Bakshi and smiled and said , "Thank you Auntyji. It would be our pleasure!!!! We like our tea a little sweet!!"

Mrs. Bakshi soon found herself making tea for her robbers. She wasn't ready to believe this but this was really happening. And the guy was so polite!!!!! Damn it!! What was happening???

Pho-Ding and his friends relished the tea.

"This tea is one of the best I ever had Auntyji. Thank a lot!!" Pho-Ding said.

A sense of pride crept in to Mrs.Bakshi's appearance. She could not help smiling. Mr.Bakshi looked enquiringly at her wife. He shot questioning glances towards her. Her son too looked at his mother in the same quizzical manner. They were confused. What was going on??? Is this a robbery or a tea party???

Pho-Ding then got up and along with his partners who were silent the whole time thanked the whole family for their time. And they bade them good bye. Of course all the cell phones were taken and the landlines disconnected so they could not contact the police. And by the time the Bakshi's actually got to the police, Pho-Ding and his gang would be long gone. Then they quickly made their exit in to the dark night.

Epilogue:-

Pho-Ding's Gang was never caught. The Bakshi's were still in a shock for a long time. Mrs.Bakshi is quiet sure that she was drugged that night, as she is still trying very hard to explain for her unusual behaviour that evening to her family.

However what the Bakshi's can never forget was how polite were the robbers to them!!!

The Soup

As I sat, on the table, my friend's over enthusiastic mother started to keep dining plates in front of me and my friend Abhijeet. Abhijeet's mother had invited me for a lunch this Sunday. I had very well accepted the invitation as my Dad had gone out and no one was there at my place. So spending the afternoon at my friend's place was a welcome break for me. I had never dined at my friend's place so this all was pretty new to me. I had heard Abhijeet telling me before that her mother was trying out some new dishes, learning from the T.V shows. So today I was the Guinea pig, I thought. But no matter. I thought, how bad it could be??

"Beta I am going to serve you some Baingan (Brinjal) soup first. Try it out. I made it for the first time." My friend's mother smiled at started to serve the soup.

I personally had never heard of Baingan soup. But let's try it out, I thought!!!

She had served the soup. I could see pieces of little Baingan pieces floating, and bobbing up and down in the dark blue coloured soup. This looked inedible!!!! How can I taste it much less consume it!!! Dear God, I looked up and said a little prayer, please help me. Please give me the strength to consume this .thing .and walk out alive!!!!

Come on, it could not be that bad, I said to myself giving my self a positive thought!!!

In the mean time, my friend had already started to take the soup. He had gulped down a few spoons.

So you see, I thought (giving myself confidence), it must not be that bad!!!!

I put the spoon took a little of the soup and put in my mouth and .uuugggghhhh!!!!!

This is no food for human!!!! Holy mother of all gods!!!!! What is this????? It tastes so bad!!!!

I was aware my face had contorted, and I was wincing!!!! My friend was totally engrossed with the soup (Is he human???) and his mother was in the kitchen!!!

I must not let them realize anything!!! I must do some thing!!! I can't take this. I would be poisoned!!!

His mother came out and said, "Beta do you want more???"

More???? Are you crazy??? This is poisoning!!!! I merely shook my head!!!

I took another spoon and carefully took the contents in my mouth. And I felt the pang!!! What is this???? Baingan???? I never knew Baingan could be this bad!!!  I swallowed it with a lot of effort!!! My face was sweating already!!! ¾ th bowl more to go!!! Come on, Arindam, you can do this!!!! Be brave!!! Be strong!!! The next 5 minutes were torture. It felt like a millennium. Time had ceased to exist. I don't remember much of anything else after that. Only I rushed quickly out of their house. My stomach was doing all sorts of things and weird noises had started to come out of it!!!!

But the next day I turned up fine. Thanks to Heaven and all the gods!!! They had saved me. I promised myself that the next time anyone calls for lunch, and if I could not avoid the invitation, call the ambulance well in advance for myself!!!

I was returning home from my Dadi' place. This included a Bus Journey. Almost around 3 hours in bus, after which I reach a station from where I can catch a train to Mumbai. In front of me sat a young man in the early twenties I should think so. And beside me a lady of say 50 years. The young man was thin. And he was looking tired. His face was rough and the cheek bones were so prominent that it gave the impression that his eyes were bulging out. This all feature was not really the main eye catcher. It was his eyes. I was looking at him now for sometime. Trying to understand what was wrong with his eyes.

His right eye moved very little. While the left eye did all the moving when he was looking. Also I noticed that the colour of the pupils of his eyes were slightly different. And his right eye it seemed was a little bigger. After about staring at him for 10 to 15 minutes I understood. It was a fake eye. Of course I thought, this explains everything. Now I was looking at him now continuously for sometime. And this had made the young man very edgy. But I was far too engrossed in his eye to understand that he was getting highly conscious. But I continued to stared at him.

"Excuse me, But why are you staring at him?" the lady beside me almost shouted.

"uhhh ..!!!!" I blurted out in surprise.

"You have been staring at him for the last 15 minutes. I was looking at you. Why are you staring at him??" The lady shouted. Everyone in the bus obviously heard this and all the heads were now looking at me. And every one's stare was grilling in to me. I suddenly felt very uncomfortable.

"Uhh I er .I am sorry but I .." I was stuttering and was unable to complete my sencetence.

"You people have no manners. Staring at people. Why don't you mind your own business?" The lady's high pitched voice rung into my ear.

Why is this lady shouting? I mean, what's her problem?? It's not as if I was staring at her. I was staring at the guy. Why is she shouting?? I thought. I wanted to speak but due to the suddenness of the situation I was tongue-tied. And now every one was staring at me as if I had committed a grave crime.

"It's ok, Mom relax!!!" The man said to the lady.

Ohh my god, that lady is the mother of the guy. That's why she is shouting. Oh Dear!!!

Now every one knew what had happened !!!! And I was sitting beside this lady!!! Great!!!

I was now highly conscious of my behavior. I was desperately trying to look somewhere else. In this process, I met with a few stares, even the bus conductor was giving a cold stare!!!

'Hmmmm so this is how it feels like to be highly uncomfortable!!' My mind thought somewhere in the corner of my brain.

I was getting back what I had given to the man, only now almost 50 eyes were staring at me. I desperately looked at my watch. Two hours more!!!

'Oh Dear God ..what torture!!!' I thought.

Part One

It was a lazy Saturday afternoon, and I was strolling with my friend on the marine drive. The cold fresh Sea air was doing us a world of good. The week was hectic. We were just talking about our lives and how busy and hectic it had become. Suddenly from across the road a boy came running towards us. I thought maybe he was going to sit here or something. But he came straight towards us. He stopped in front of us.

"Excuse me!!" he said, "But I couldn't help noticing you from across the road."

I stared at him. I didn't know him. Who was he and why had he come to me?

"I think you look quiet handsome!!!" he said looking very seriously at me. And he had a straight face.

I stared at him with my mouth almost full open. He was a boy of maybe 20 or so. He looked smart and a college kid I presumed. But nowadays all college going kids look smart and all. I was shocked. I looked at my friend. He looked at me and gave slight chuckle.

"What??" I stuttered.

"I said, I think you look smart. I only wanted to say this. I was going along and then I noticed you. And I thought you look quiet smart and handsome. So I thought of telling it to you." He said.

I looked across the street. There was a girl standing. I thought maybe she was with him.

I looked at him again. I was at a complete loss of words. Do I look Gay or something?

I mean nothing of this sort has ever happened to me. What is this guy crazy or what?

"Ohhhhk " I blurted out. I couldn't answer him properly. He thought I was handsome. This is crazy. I mean I am an average looking guy. Not particularly handsome. But this guy comes out from nowhere and tells me that I am handsome. And I don't even know him.

Then he darted across the other side of the road, without saying anything else. And then he and that girl started walking together on the opposite side. I thought I saw them laughing. But this experience left me speechless.

My friend who was just behind me said, "Dude .I am so hot for you you handsome dog!!!!!" and started to laugh.

"Shut up!!" I said, "And don't ever mention this incident to anyone ..you understand .no one .!!!!"

If anyone of my friend ever got the wind of this, I would be a laughing stock, I thought.

What a weird kid and what a weird experience. My friend hadn't stopped laughing. And I was shell shocked. 

                              Part Two 

The boy darted across the street towards the girl. The girl was waiting eagerly for him.

"Did you really say that to him??" She asked with a gleam of excitement in her eyes.

"Told you I could do it!!!!" The boy answered proudly. "So when are you treating me??"

"ok ok you win the bet .But I really never thought you could do it. How did the guy react?? Wish I was there to see the look on his poor face. He must have had the shock of his life." The girl said with an excitement of a child. And she was almost laughing.

The Guy started to laugh.

"Hey, don't laugh now .lets start to walk. He is still in shock and is looking at us. Lets get out of here!!" She said trying to suppress her laughter.

"Ok ok And don't ever bet on me that I can't do this and that. You wanted me to tell some stranger that the guy is handsome and I did it." The guy said.

"Ok baba you win .and you have lots of courage ok !!!" The girl answered, "Now lets get out of here, before the guy catches us."

And then they walked away holding each other hands.