justread’s blog

BOLLYWOOD IS  STUNNED ,so do millions of  fans , film goers & public.News has just received, you can cheak with other news agencies & media.SALMAN KHAN  has HANGED himself. Some are telling it is a murder,some are telling it is due to depression he was suffering for ash-abhisek marriage. I am shocked, because

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{what else can surprise my ilander friends ?

it is an aprilfool prank,have a great day}

Married Men- They discuss about the unmarried girl , who is present \works near them.

Married Women- They discuss about the married woman, who is not present near them.

What u say ilandes ?

After the debacle worldcup show indian cricket team is attending a spesial meeting with BCCI officials.here are the sneak preview.
Sharad pawar- We should take it easy,it is part of life.An inquiry will be carried out to find out whether Dalmiya has any role in this debacle.

1Vengsarkar- For god's sake, this time atleast give the chairman of selection commite(me) a chance to select players.

2.Greg chapel- settle my payment first, then only I shall give my report.

3.Team manager ' what report ?I had prepared report for loss in super '8 & semifinal. Just wait.

4 Rahul dravid ' Sehwag,harbhajan & death of woolmer were responsible.

5 Tendulkar- Aila, donot blame my adv,blame the Bangladesh & srilanka bowlers.

6 Sehwag- Its all due to yoga (but I batted nicely)

7Harbhajan- The pitch was turning, not my ball.

8Ganguly- I have not done anything worng except quick runs.

9Kumble ;- I was not allowed to play in my farewell match (vs srilanka)

10- Dhoni- My Hair & Darrel Hair were culprits.

11Pattan ' I was a visitor only.

12 Yuvraj- My girlfriends were not allowed to travel with me.

13 Lalu Yadav- Give me the sports ministry ,chairmanship of BCCI & make my son captain of Indian team;I will guarentee the world cup.

14 Dawood Ibrahim- Just give me the entire team, to collect my losses from betting.

15 INDIAN PUBLIC ' Donot worry,we can still wait another four years to eat dust in the next world cup.

{just imaginary………whats going in your mind ?}

Ravi was feeling very uncomfortable due to heavy rush in the train.It was jam packed.That too in the afternoon so many local passangers were traveling without ticket. So persons like him with valid reservation has to suffer. He thought of smoking a ciggarate;but restrained himself seeing the "no smoking warning" on the side wall.he tried to peep through the window, to see the greenery & get a little fresh air.

Ravi was going to Nagpur on a official tour.The train will reach at about 11 pm in the night.Wife Smita has already packed his dinner & some snacks for the journey.Even if he is eligible for a\c class travel,could not get the reservation;so he was forced to go in 2^nd class sleeper. But he really liked the sleeper class; Since his childhood he is accustomed with it. He feels comfortable in this classs,as he thinks here people talk to each other, mingle with each other, share their feeling with each other. So you never feel bore ,as you get so much new company.

Now the problem was how to eat in that atmosphere ? Ravi was feeling hungry & thirsty.It was hot & humid.One vendor with colddrinks came into the compartment,but bottles were not cool atall;' why to drink that (hot) colddrink' .a passenger sitting next to Ravi asked.

It is better to have lassi,nariyal pani(cocunut water) or plain water in this condition than colddrinks ;some other fellow passanges remarked. Ravi took out a bottle of water from his bag,opened the cap & was about to drink; Suddenly he heard a voice with strange accent ; "Is it mineral water ? I forgot to bring one. you know I am from LA United States of Aamerica. I can't drink outside water .u know".

Ravi looked upwards;saw a strange looking creature with funnyhairdo & joker like clothes talking to him.He thought this NRI was putting more thurst on America while pronouncing. Before Ravi could say anything the co -passenger , sitting next to him took the bottle from his hand & tasted the water and told ,"yes it is MINERAL WATER. See the lebel & moreover ravibabu also will not drink outside water."He passed the bottle to that NRI. After a few drinks he gave back half bottle to ravi saying, "I shall purchage a bottle for you & thanks"
Suddenly a small girl who sitting on her mother's lap shouted "maa, I want water.bring water now". "just wait for few moments, station is coming.we will drink in the platform". The mother told her giving a glance at Ravi. Seeing the dry face of the little girl Ravi gave a smile & gave the bottle to her mother. "no, no , sir. Please drink yourself first. She will have it in the station. Moreover it is mineral water purchaged by you. 'She has to drink first.please give her.' With smile someother pax also supported him.

The little girl gladly quenched her thirst Her mother was telling her 'see your luck,you are drinking mineral water'. Say namaste to babu. The look in the girl's face was saying a million thanks to Ravi. The balance little water was gulped by that lady. Ravi got back the empty bottle.He was thinking whether he has done correct thing in traveling here . He was feeling a little akward as he could not tell his co-passengers that the bottle was not a mineral water, but tap water filled by him.

Next station arrived. Ravi got down & purchased a mineral water bottle this time.He saw that little girl & her mother on the platform with their bags. "Thanks babu for the water"Ravi told apologetically 'that was not mineral water.i am sorry.but now I have mineral water.will you have".The lady gave a smile & told, "who drinks mineral water babu?we can drink from anywhere .we are lucky if we get it from municipality".The little girl shake his hand & said "TA-TA".

The train started to move.Ravi got up & drank half a bottle of water.He saw that NRI coming out from his seat towards the door & asked him 'oh, the train had left. I could not purche a bottle for you.sorry. anyhow is it mineral water ? He was referring to ravi's water bottle.

"NO,NO,I HAD JUST FILLED THAT OLD BOTTLE WITH TAP WATER FROM THE PLATFORM"

{put your comment please}

1.They have saved our physics(time,energy,space)

2.They have created space for minor teams to go to super-8 stage(they are so considerate)

3.Atleast they have won one match &have made proud by making a world record.(never underestimate Bermuda,for them our head is high today)

4.Now we can save so much power(as nobody will watch matches keenly)

5.Advertisers will have to eat dust, we can now see prog without our cricket heroe's photos appearing at regular intervals.(sachin,sehwag,dravid listing !)

6.Late night party ,liquor consumptions,cigarate smoking will come down.(poor hoteliers)

7.Now our team has proved that they were not world cup favourite ,but were only ADVERTISEMENT favourite team.(I can do modeling now)

8.All ladies can happily watch their soap opera & children can watch their fav cartoon channels without any intruption by papas, brothers & husbands.(in pak also)

9.Rate of tv will come down.(u can buy now)

10.Tickets to WI & tickets for diff world cup matches will be available at throw away price.(any takers ?)

11.Other sports personality will get chance for advertasiment.(see how democratic our players)

12.No more prizes & pujas for our teams .(ohh god)

13.Now tv channels need not arrange fortune tellers for our match results.(so sad)

14.Mandira Bedi's blouse may go up(so silly)

15.Our team has shown that they are not greedy.(we have alredy won a cup 1983)

16.No more gossip at public places & offices regarding cricket (more work !husss..)

17.Betting will come down.(congrats my team)

18.Retired players will come out from grave to criticize BCCI & players (as if they have won several cups)

19.Now we can focus more on Wolmer murder story & criticize PAK players.(scapegoat ?)

20.Last but not the least,now we will think to have"FOREIGN PLAYERS' rather than "FOREIGN COACH ONLY"! {don't be surprised )

Instead of 'HU, HA INDIA' .. others are telling "THU, THA. INDIA".

BUT STILL I LOVE MY CRICKET TEAM.(sometime I lie)

What u say friends ?)

Death of Bob Wolmer has stunned everyone. Any guess who could have done this ?Here are few( funny) statements.

1)Parvez musharaf ' whoever has done this ,is totally worng.

{To manhandle bob & execute the chief justice was the original order ?)

2)Jamaica police- May be two persons were involved in this murder.

{Shoib akhtar & Asif ' But we have not gone to west indies !}

3)One pak player ' Inzaman bhai might have fallen down on him accidentally.

4)Press ' 'Mr Inzaman,what is your opinion?

{Insa Allah , yeh pure team ka kamal hai,ladke sabne ache khele(in the name of Allah, it is a team work, all boys played well);

5) Scotlandyard police- Now it is difficult to understand the statements  of pak players.

{bcoz pak players were instructed by PCB to speak only in URDU}

6)Terrorists living in PAK 'Anyhow Bob Wolmer was Indian born.

7)Old players of PAK ' We are telling since long; Keep a Pakistani coach.

8)PCB- Did the arguments between Bob & players on that night was for the banned substances meant for players ?

9) Greg chappel–What is the next flight to aus ?(this was added as somefriends asked)
*{THIS IS PURE IMAGINARY THING.DONOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY.}[My sincere condolences to  'BOB WOLMER'.May his soul live in peace.]

WHAT IS YOUR COMMENT ?

Geoege bush went to visit one school in USA.One student named 'Tom' asked him, 'Mr president I have two questions for you'

1)why did you attack Iraq without full support of UNO & sufficient proof about weapons of mass destruction ?

2)where is Osama Bin Laden ?

Suddenly bell rang for tiffin break. After half an hour break, Mr bush came back to the same class .This time one other boy named 'Smith' asked "Mr President, I have four questions for you" .

1)why did you attack Iraq without full support of UNO & sufficient proof about weapons of mass destruction ?

2)where is Osama Bin Laden ?

3)why the tiffin break bell rang one hour before time today ?

4)last question; where is my friend 'Tom' ?

{what u say ilanders ?}

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1)Hyderabad traffic police is offering rose flowers to helmet less riders, a new statergy for safety awareness.

# Terrific,so many boys are driving without helmet intentionally , to get a free Rose for girlfriend.Lagge Raho Traffic Bhai.

2) India have won their match against BERMUDA.

# BCCI is arguing to give a test match status to them,sehwag is asking for a ten one day series with them.

3)Pervez musharaf has admitted that there is procedural lapse in dismissing the supreme court chief justice.

# we know sir, "to hang him" was your original choice.

4)Now our Lok-sabha & Rajya sabha  has turned into free for all wrestling arena.

# Ten Sports want to telecast it as exclusive "WWF" slot.

5)Sad demise of Pak coach BOB WOLMER .

#In an urgent meeting of PCB:-  mistakenly did he take all the banned stuffs kept for our fast bowlers for super '8 stage ?

6) According to a press report: Americans are responsible for generating roughly 20 %of the garbage in the world.

# The other 80 % is created by  GEORGE BUSH,  due to war .

{Don’t forget to leave your comments}

I am not a citizen

Of India

As I can't have a

Birth certificate or

Proof of my demise

Nobody cares whether

I am born or dead

For all I am a burden .

thoughThey call me goddess

But never worship me

Rather sacrifice me to get

A   'GOD',

They call me Laxmi

But blame

me for all the

Evil & loss of fortunes.

If I don't go to school

Nobody cares

If I am sick

Nobody bothers

But if I am unmarried

All eyebrows raise.

If I look forward or

Ask for social justice, equality

I am branded a rebel, witch;

My mom sometimes kills me

Before I born

In-laws burn me,society molests me.

The agony & torture goes on & on

Is it my fault to be born as

" A GIRL CHILD"

(dedicated to millions of unborn girl children)

Child- Dad , is god black or white ?

Dad- he is both.

Child- is god male or female ?

Dad-he is both.

Child- is god straight or gay ?

Dad- he is both.

Child- dad, is god MICHALE JACKSON ?

{heard from a source}

{not meant to offend any jacko fan, just for fun )