Once upon a time, a man decided to vacation on a cruise shipin the Caribbean.
It was wonderful–the experience of his life!
He was waited upon hand and foot. But, alas, it didnot last.
A hurricane came up suddenly and the ship wentdown.
The man found himself, he knew not how, swept up on the shore of an island.
There was nothing else anywhere to beseen.
No person, no supplies, nothing.The man looked around.
There were some bananas and coconuts,but that was it.
He was desperate and forlorn, but decided tomake the best of it.
So for the next four months he atebananas, drank coconut juice
and mostly looked to the seamightily for a ship to come to his rescue.
One day, as he was lying on the beach stroking his beard and looking
for a ship, he spotted movement out of the corner ofhis eye.
Could it be true, was it a ship?
No, from aroundthe corner of the island came a rowboat.
In it was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen . . . or at least,
within the past four months.
She was tall and tanned, and her blond hair flowed in the sea breeze,
giving her an almost ethe real quality.
She spotted him also (since he was waving and
yelling and screaming to get her attention),
and she rowed herboat towards him.
In disbelief, he asked, “Where did you come from?
How didy ou get here?”
She said, “I rowed from the other side of the island.
I landed on this island when my cruise ship sank.
“”Amazing”, he said,
“I didn’t know anyone else had survived.
How many of you are there? Where did you get the rowboat?
You must have been really lucky to have a rowboat wash-up withyou.
“”It is only me”, she said, “and the rowboat didn’t wash up,
nothing else did.”"Well then”, said the man,
“how did you get the rowboat?”
“I made the rowboat out of raw material that I found on the island,” replied the woman.
“The oars were whittled from Gumtree branches, and I wove the bottom from Palm branches,
and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree.
“”But, but…,” stuttered the man,
“what about tools and hardware,
how did you do that?”"Oh, no problem,” replied the woman,
“on the south side ofthe island there is a very unusual strata of alluvial rockexposed.
I found that if I fired it to a certain temperaturein my kiln,
it melted into forgeable ductile iron. I used that for tools,
then used the tools to make the hardware.
“”But, enough of that,” she said, “where do you live?”
Atlast the man was forced to confess that he had been sleeping on the beach.
“Well, let’s row over to my place,” she said.
So they got into the rowboat and left for her side of island.
The woman easily rowed them around to a wharf that led to the approach to her place.
She tied up the rowboat with a beautifully woven hemp rope.
They walked up a stone walk andaround a palm tree,
and there stood an exquisite bungalowpainted in blue and white.
“It’s not much,” she said, “but Icall it home.
Sit down, please.
Would you like a drink?”
“No thanks,” said the man, “one more coconut juice and I will puke.
“”It won’t be coconut juice, the woman replied.
“I have astill; how about a Pina Colada?”
Trying to hide his continue damazement,
the man accepted, and they sat down on her couch totalk.
After a while, when they had exchanged their stories,
the woman asked, “Tell me, have you always had a beard?”
“No”, the man replied, “I was clean shaven all of my life,even on the cruise ship”.
“Well if you would like to shave, there’s a razor upstairs inthe cabinet in the bathroom.
” The man, no longer questioninganything, went upstairs to the bathroom.
In the cabinet was arazor made from a bone handle,
with two shells honed to ahollow-ground edge fastened to its end inside of a swivelmechanism.
The man shaved, showered and went back downstairs.”You look great,” said the woman,
“I think I’ll go up andslip into something more comfortable.”
The man settled in towait, continuing to sip his Pina Colada.
After a short time,the woman returned wearing strategically positioned fig leaves
and smelling faintly of gardenia.”Tell me something,” she said,
“We have both been out herefor a very long time with no companionship.
You know what I mean. Have you been lonely?
Is there anything that youreally miss?
Something that all men and woman need?
Something that it would be really nice to have right now?”
“Yes there is,” the man replied, moving closer to the woman
while fixing her with a long, intense gaze.
“Tell me… Do you happen to have an internet connection?”
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