The incident that I am about to narrate happened one Sunday morning in Chennai. A shabbily dressed young man of about 25 (he was shabbily dressed not because he didn't have a good dress sense but because he was of the opinion that on Sundays, everyone should free themselves of all shackles, and that included pressed shirt and pants) rang the door bell. A man of around 60 opened the door. Let us call him Uncle, like we Chennaites call anyone who has no hair or a few grey hairs. From the way he has applied vibhooti liberally on his forehead, it is quite evident that he is in the middle of his morning pooja. Let us call the young man Thambi.

The conversation between the Uncle and Thambi went on something like this:

Uncle: What do you want?

Thambi: Uncle, sorry for bothering you on a relaxed Sunday morning but I saw your ad that I can contact you for a house nearby…

Uncle: Oh, yes… we have a two bed room flat. Where is your father working? How many of you will be there?

Thambi: My father works in Kanpur. He is a Professor there.

Uncle: Then, who wants the house?

Thambi: Uncle, I want the house. I am working here as an IT professional. I intend to stay with a couple of my colleagues.

Uncle: ohoh! You want the house to stay with your friends?

Thambi: yes..

Uncle: All of you are bachelors?

Thambi: Of course Uncle, we are only 25.

Uncle: We don't like to give our house to young bachelors. There are young girls in the other flats. So, the neighbours are very particular that young bachelors should not come anywhere in the vicinity. Young bachelors are unruly, indisciplined and untrustworthy…

Thambi wanted to say that he and his friends did not intend molest the neighbourhood girls or had no plans to have sex with them but kept his mouth shut.

Uncle: You people come with girls to the flat and indulge in dirty things… no.. no..We can't give our flat to such people..

Thambi wanted to say, we don't do any such things. Of course, our friends do drop in and there are girls too among them…

 Uncle: You people play loud music, talk loudly and disturb everyone. You people come and go at odd times. Even at 12 at night, girls come back from office. In our times, I have not seen any woman coming from office at 12 midnight. I don't like such loose characters. Boys should be with boys and girls should be with girls..

Thambi wanted to ask, have you heard of gays and lesbians, Uncle? You are against only opposite sexes meeting..

Uncle: Now, tell me do you listen to Venkatesa suprabhatam in the morning?

Thambi: (so shocked was he at the question that he mumbled something. He had no courage to say that he listened to the swear words of Eminem in the morning.)

Uncle: Do you have a conduct certificate with you certifying that you are a good boy?

Thambi: I don't have any certificates with me that says I am a good boy. But if I ask my mother, she will certify me as the most lovable, cute and obedient son ever born on earth. (He didn't say that his father finds him obnoxious and irritating.)

Uncle: I don't want any certificate from your mother. I want it from your employer.

Thambi: (thinks about his manager who finds him cheating by chatting on the net when he was supposed to be coding)

Uncle: If you can get a good conduct certificate from your office, I will consider your application.

Now a Mami appeared and told him in a hush-hush voice that no bachelors should be permitted as they are dangerous. "No, we can't rent out our house to bachelors," she was very firm.

Uncle: Yes, that was what I was telling him. No Thambi, we can't give our flat to you even if you bring a good conduct certificate.

Thambi: Uncle, were you not a bachelor once? I am sure you were not born like this and had been married to Mami from the day you were born. You were also 25 once. I think you were very bad as a 25 year old. That's why you suspect all of us nice kids.

The young man then turned to Mami and said, 'I came here because my friend who also happened to be your son told me to meet you here. Yes, he told me he faces the same kind of questions in Bangalore. Uncle, your son is also 25 and he is also a bad bachelor! I think you forgot that..'

Without waiting for any reply, the young man then slowly walked out with a naughty smile on his face. Need I say both Uncle and Mami stood there transfixed?

Though I also operate within the realms of Indian English media, though I am aware of its “pseudo-secular” credentials, I was baffled by the kind of lop-sided, anti-Modi coverage of the Gujarat elections, especially in the electronic media.

The English newspapers and news channels declare themselves as “unbiased and secular” while they act as if they are the stooges of one particular political formation. I strongly feel unless you are the mouthpiece of a political party, you are supposed to keep your biases aside while writing and reporting. But on the day the Gujarat election results were announced, I saw open disappointment on the faces on many English news channels, and many were seen commenting in the beginning that all was not lost for the Congress and only the urban results had started trickling in and once the rural and tribal-area results were out, it would be a totally different picture. Is this the way the balanced media should report? I think not.

Once it was known that Modi had swept Gujarat, the discussion took on a different direction. The champions of “secularism” declared that in no time, there would be grave problems in the BJP as Modi had become bigger than the party. They also predicted that his next target would be L.K.Advani’s position. Various news channels speculated on how Modi’s victory would adversely affect the BJP.

But not a single journalist spoke about how ineffective Madame Gandhi’s and Rahul Gandhi’s campaigns had been. Like the sycophantic Congress, the ‘secular’ media also did not find anything wrong with the Gandhis. The fault, the incompetence lay with the local leadership. Or was it the electorate that was to blame for their choice? 

The newspapers, like the Communist parties, wanted the Congress to rethink and regroup so that the nation could be saved from the ‘communal’ BJP. Many newspapers, in their editorial advised the Congress on how to stop the “communal” BJP. But the funniest comment came from the CPM; “what is required is a determined and uncompromising struggle against the communal ideology of Hindutva and the capacity to launch sustained struggles of all sections of people who suffered from the right wing economic policies of the Modi government.”

As an Indian, certain questions come to my mind. One is, by talking for the majority, if the BJP becomes communal, what do you call the Congress for exploiting the minority which they have been doing ever since India won independence? If the BJP is polarising the society, what do you say about the Congress that had been polarising the Indian society on caste and religious lines? In Gujarat also, had they not been trying to exploit the Patels? You look at Kerala, how many caste based parties are there? Both the Congress and the communist parties field candidates based on the caste preferences of the area. How do you describe this? Secularism?

Among the news channels, nobody except noted journalist M.J.Akbar was interested in analysing the reasons for Modi’s spectacular victory and his unbelievable rise in popularity throughout the country.

Throughout the campaign, Modi spoke about the kind of development he had brought about in Gujarat but how many newspapers and television channels spoke about that? Gujarat could attract investment of US$ 17.8 billion in 2006-07 when the country as a whole attracted $69 billion during the same period. When India’s GDP growth is 9%, it is 13% in Gujarat. Industrial growth in India is 11% while it is 15% in Gujarat. Gujarat accounts for 20% of India’s industrial output, 25% of the country’s textile production, 40% of its pharmaceutical production, 47% of its petrochemical production and 21% of the country’s exports.

Dr. M.S. Swaminathan, the father of India’s Green Revolution, (who makes it clear he differs with Modi’s politics),  recently told me in an interview, “Some states like Gujarat have done good work, so the agricultural growth rate in Gujarat is over 9%. That is because they have been given the soil health cards, they have been given credit; in short, they have been given all the support system. They have a lot of land in the Kutch region, and they have developed it. Whatever may be Modi’s politics, which I may not approve, he is a very good administrator.” Gujarat achieved this when the country’s agricultural growth was a mere 2%.

I wonder if Modi is maut ka saudagar, what do you call the Congress for what happened in 1984? What do you call the Communists for what happened in Nadigram?

It is high time the nation knew what Modi had done for his state rather than talking about communalism? It is high time to find out what the younger generation of India find in him? It is high time to find out why he is the hero of modern India? It is also high time the English media in India came out of the warp of pseudo secularism and see the reality that is there in the country.

It has been a week since the US warship USS Nimitz left the shores of Chennai but I am still disturbed. No, I am not thinking about the alleged nuclear emission or the shameful way with which India prostrated and still prostrates in front of the US. I am only thinking about what the sailors did in Chennai.

What disturbed me the most was the hysteria in the newspapers. Reporters went gaga over the ship and the sailors, followed the sailors day and night and flashed not one two but several of their pictures on the front pages.

Who are these sailors? Are they heroes to be given such a welcome? Have they done any heroism in the warn- torn countries like rescuing human beings from burning houses and vehicles which were bombed by the same warship?

On the other hand, what had the war ship been doing all these years? Missiles sent from this particular ship had been killing women, children and men in Afghanistan, Iraq and Somalia. I have no idea how many they might have killed so far; it is not in hundreds or thousands, much, much more than that. The fact is they also may not have any idea about the numbers, and perhaps they just don't care.

It is another matter that Americans care only about the lives of Americans and all the other lives are indispensable. The attitude is, why they should care about the lives of the poor Afghans or Iraqis or Somalians.

I am reminded of what George Bush the Senior said in July 1988 when a missile cruiser, the USS Vincennes, stationed in the Persian Gulf, accidentally shot down an Iranian airliner and killed 290 civilian passengers. He said, “I will never apologise for the United States. I don't care what the facts are.” Yes, they just don't care.

USS Nimitz was on its way from Iraq when it docked at Chennai Port. The smiling sailors were first taken to a Muslim school where they caressed the children, hugged them, kissed them, and showered them with gifts. Remember it is the same hands that let the missiles fly from the war ship which killed hundreds and thousands of young Iraqi kids. Will caressing some Muslim children in Chennai wash away the bloodstains from their hands?

They also visited a school which has physically and mentally challenged children. Again, the same act of love and affection was shown. I wonder whether they didn't think of all those innocent Iraqi children who have been orphaned, who lost either their hands or legs, who are paralysed, who are bed ridden all because of them. Do they not even once think of those children and felt a pang of guilt? From their faces, I don't think the thought ever flashed their minds. They acted as if they were doing a great service to these children.

Newspapers reported that they then went around cleaning our beaches and schools. As if we need some Americans to clean our beaches and paint our schools! Have they ever tried to clean the mess they have created in Afghanistan and Iraq?

Newspaper reporters were behind them when they visited the bars, when they drank, when they puked all over the ground and when they even visited women in Kodambakkam for sex! I pity the policemen who had to literally push and carry the drunken sailors to the bus.

Finally when in Chennai, they also celebrated their independence day. How could they celebrate when many countries are suffering and lost their independence because of them?

Finally when the war ship left the shores of Chennai, they were given heroes' farewell. If those who send missiles to kill innocent children, if those who drink and puke without any shame, if those who visit brothels when they are in another country as guests are the modern day heroes, I feel sad about the whole world.

Till I came to Chennai from Kerala, I had only heard of the kind of hysteria Rajnikanth generates among the public but when I really saw it, I found it quite puzzling. I could only look at the unadulterated, unabashed admiration, love and worship of a film actor with surprise.

But despite my repeated efforts, I have not been able to interview him so far. The truth is, the more popular they are, the more inaccessible they become. As a journalist, the inaccessibility of film stars was quite unacceptable to me. I was used to super stars like Mohanlal and Mammootty themselves answering their phones and giving you immediate appointments but there I was at my wit's end trying to get appointments with people connected with films like Kamal Haasan, Rajnikanth, Mani Ratnam and A.R.Rahman. Jayalalitha was the Chief Minister of Tamil Nadu then and like a fool, I thought getting an interview with her was as easy as getting an interview with the Chief Minister of Kerala.

It was only after seven years of trying that I got to interview Kamal Haasan. And only a few months ago, just before the release of Guru, could I interview Mani Ratnam! These interviews happened after more than ten years of my efforts. But so far no such luck with Jayalalitha, Rajnikanth or A.R.Rahman.

Let me narrate an incident that happened more than ten years ago but one which I will never forget in my life. I had just landed in Chennai and the Mumbai office of the weekly paper I was writing for asked me to get an interview with Rajnikanth. Stupid me thought it was an easy task. Despite me wasting hundreds of calls, I could not get anywhere near getting an appointment. One day I was lucky enough to talk to a person who said he was his secretary. He told me to come and stand in a queue the next day morning so that I could have a darshan of him - no, not Rajni but his secretary. I could then submit my request to him in writing. I was horrified to hear such a demand. I was just back from Kerala after interviewing A.K. Antony, the then Chief Minister of the state. All I made was one telephone call.

I told him, "With one telephone call, I could make an appointment with the Chief Minister of Kerala and interview him. Here I must have made hundreds of phone calls and now you are telling me to come and stand in the queue…" He laughed sarcastically and said, "Madam, that is the chief minister of Kerala, and this is Rajnikanth!" I was too shocked to react!

But in the last one decade, I have had the good fortune to see Rajnikanth at closer quarters on TWO occasions; one was a press conference and the other a public function. The press conference happened before the last assembly election. Rajnikanth was being harassed by the Pattali Makkal Katchi workers for "polluting the minds of the youngsters of Tamil Nadu" and Rajni decided to issue a press statement against them urging people not to vote for the party.

From outside, the venue of the press conference looked more like a film function with thousands and thousands of Rajni fans shouting and rushing up to the closed gate in waves. It was a herculean task for myself and my journalist friend to squeeze through the surging multitude to reach the gate. When we got so badly crushed, we decided to go back but then we found that it was equally difficult get out too.

But what shocked us was the way we were treated by the security guards of the super star. Despite showing our press passes and telling them that we were there because we were invited for the press conference, they rudely shooed us away. 'Go away, the hall is full, you can't get in,' they shouted at us. Both of us got so angry that we also shouted back, 'Don't think we are some crazy fans. We came here because we were invited. Have some manners to people who are your invitees.' But our anger had no effect on them. Luckily, the PR agency who invited us appeared and apologised for the rude behaviour of the body guards, and we were ushered in.

What impressed me about Rajnikanth was his punctuality. Unlike other film stars, he was there on the dot. One minute before the scheduled time the super star, surrounded by a cordon of people came in. He sat on the chair, smiled at all of us, and started reading from a prepared text. If I remember correctly, it took him around fifteen minutes to finish reading the text. The moment it was over, he gave us a benevolent smile, got up and started walking away. All the journalists who had assembled there were nonplussed for a moment. Then, they raised their voice, 'how can you go without answering our questions? What was the need for a press conference if it was only to read a prepared text?' But our protests had had no effect on him. He simply walked away.

The doors of the hall were closed yet we could hear his fans shouting from outside. By the time we came out, the place was rather empty. When his car moved away, all his fans also dispersed.

The next function was Rajni's fast protesting Karantaka's refusal to release water from the Cauvery. This time also, he arrived at the venue much before the fast was to start, wearing white pyjamas and kurta. What is admirable about the man is his openness; he never hid his receding hairline unlike most stars who are extremely narcissistic. He sat cross legged on the dais with his eyes closed. On the road sat thousand and thousands of his fans with their eyes fully open. Whenever he opened his eyes or waved at them, they roared. The kind of impact a batting of his eye lid or a smile had on them had seen to be believed.

Every time an actor or actress came to the dais to garland him or join him, Rajni got up, held his or her hands warmly. Not even once did he sit there when someone came on stage. It is this humility and simplicity that impressed me but I am sure it is his famous style that is a hit with his fans.

One afternoon about two years ago, when I saw Pandian, a handicapped vegetable vendor, he was almost in tears. His small wooden booth, straddling the pavement was full of fresh, bright vegetables. Unsold vegetables. Until then, his shop used to be almost empty by afternoon.

On his two-wheeler, Pandian used to ride to the main market at Koyambedu early in the morning to buy vegetables at the wholesale rate. Again, in the afternoon, he would make a second trip and come back with the contraption overloaded with more fresh vegetables for his evening customers. Life was going on very well for Pandian as he was the first vegetable vendor in the colony. Naturally he had regular customers.

When the business was good, Pandian had taken a loan and started building a house for himself and his family. When his son got admission in a Polytechnic to study engineering, without any hesitation, he sent him there. He knew he could manage everything.

What poor Pandian did not anticipate was a huge, air conditioned super market opening its branch in the residential colony. They had vegetables packed in small polythene bags; with peeled small onions and garlic too. Soon it was a matter of prestige for many of his better-off customers to go to the super market than visit Pandian's shop. As the colony consisted mainly of upper middle class and middle class residents, Pandian suddenly saw a drastic reduction in the number of his customers.

It was few days after the supermarket opened that I went to buy some vegetables from his shop.

"The supermarket has killed me. I have lost all my customers who used to come in their cars. They prefer going to the super market although I sell the freshest vegetables. Not a single vegetable in my shop is a day old still they don't want to come here. What will I do? I have just built a house. My son is studying in college. How will I pay the interest on my loan? How will I pay his fees? I don't know, I think I am doomed. My income is down by more than half!" he was nearly in tears.

He then made me promise that I would not buy a single vegetable from the super market!

A year ago, another mishap happened. His shop was razed and removed from the pavement by the corporation when the then government decided to beautify the streets of Chennai and clear all its pavements of encroachments. That would have been the last straw that broke his back.

Luckily for Pandian, the drive did not last. He successfully bribed the right people, and erected a temporary shop on the same spot, a ramshackle wooden structure propped upon four stacks of red bricks, within a week.

If you think Pandian has closed his shop by now, you are wrong. He is still there at the same place, selling vegetables, and yes, fresh vegetables. He pays the interest and instalment on his usurious loan but with great difficulty. His son is into his third year in college. The last couple of years have been extremely tough for him but he is a fighter.

Last week as we talked, he told me, 'Do you know something, ma'am, quite a few of my old customers have come back to me because they found that the vegetables these air conditioned super markets sell are not fresh like what I sell. They found that in a one kilo packet of tomatoes, they get at least 2-3 rotten tomatoes while they pick and choose the best from me! I am glad that finally sense has come back to them,' he gave me a winning smile.

I thought of Pandian today because a news item in today's newspaper caught my attention; it must have caught the attention of all Chennaiites. It was the ultimatum Dr.Ramdas, the leader of the Pattali Makkal Kachi (PMK) has issued to the bosses of the Reliance retail outlet in southern Chennai. He has said, you better get out of Chennai in a month, or we will kick you out. It seems the party leader is concerned about people like Pandian who would lose their livelihood because of Wal-Mart, Reliance, Aditya Birla group and other such corporate giants.

Even when I fully support and empathise with people like Pandian, I would like to know if the party would stop all the retail chain stores in Chennai. If the party's sympathies are only with vegetable vendors, it's wrong. Because of super markets, many small corner shops are being closed in Chennai. Then, they should see that all super markets are closed in Chennai and that the city has only corner shops.

I have to also tell you about a happy girl called Geetha who works as a sales girl in one of these super markets. She has not passed school but she makes Rs.3500 every month. That's only because she is smart and efficient. "If such shops had not come to Chennai, I would have been working like my elder sister in a leather or textile factory stitching from morning till evening to make less than Rs.1000 a month. I want more such stores here in Chennai so that we also can lead a better life," she told me.

So, when a Reliance outlet or any such outlet in the city shuts shop, many uniformed girls like Geetha would lose their jobs. When people like Pandian get affected by the entry of a giant business house, Geetha's family will lose a bread winner when the giant leaves.

"It was Monday morning. Swaminathan was reluctant to open his eyes. He considered Monday specially unpleasant in the calendar. After the delicious freedom of Saturday and Sunday, it was difficult to get into the Monday mood of work and discipline. He shuddered at the thought of school; that dismal yellow building; the fire-eyed Vedanayagam, his class-teacher; and the headmaster with his thin, long cane "

This is the opening para from R.K.Narayan's 'Swami and Friends'. I can and will never forget these lines. The first book I possessed was the Malayalam translation of 'Swami and Friends', and I was six years old then. I still remember how I used to lie down on the thin parapet of the long verandah and read the book again and again. So immersed was I in the lives of Swami and his friends that I had fallen down from the parapet quite a few times.

I didn't know then that the book was written long, long ago in 1935 because though Swaminathan was a boy, I identified with him, especially his views on Mondays. I had just started going to school and hated getting up on Mondays and going to school. I would forcibly close my eyes and act as if I were fast asleep while my mother went on shouting at me to get up. Like Swami, I also felt, after the 'delicious freedom' of Saturday and Sunday, it was so difficult to get up in the morning on a Monday.

Like Swami, I too looked at my school as a dismal yellow building, and the first period on Monday was Maths and we had a ferocious looking Kelu Master as our Maths teacher. We all dreaded him. Like Swami's headmaster, our Kelu Master also came to the class with a thin, long cane, and he used it abundantly too.

Unlike me, Swami had his grandmother living with him, and it was to her that Swami confided all about his friends. Unlike me, Swami played cricket with his friends. Unlike Swami's Malgudi, I lived in a city. But like Swami, I and my friends indulged in all sorts of naughty activities. So, though I was a girl, I identified with him, and his mischief.

When I read about how Swami felt when there was a new arrival at his house, I thought of the days when my mother was lying down on a cot with my tiny sister beside her. Every single incident in the book enthralled me because I felt Swami was me and R.K.Narayan was narrating my own story.

So emotionally and sentimentally attached was I to the first book that I bought a hard bound edition for my son when he was just four. He had just started reading comics then but when I saw the title 'Swami and Friends', I could not but pick it up for him. After that, almost every night was spent with me reading out each line and translating it into Malayalam for him. Actually I was reliving my childhood when I read out the book for my son.
That is why R.K.Narayan as a writer has a very special place in my heart. So, I was very saddened when except a couple of newspapers, nobody else felt the need to remember him on his 100th birthday last week. Television channels were busy celebrating the 64th birthday of a film star. It is true compared to the popularity a film star enjoys, how many will be interested to hear about a writer called R.K.Narayan who wrote about real Indians and almost won the Nobel Prize for literature?

N.Ram, the Editor of The Hindu wrote, "He might have approved of the low key of these celebrations - adding, in all likelihood, this caveat: "If celebrate, you must'. N. Ram further wrote, "Narayan disliked anything extravagant, sentimental, and artificial."

What gladdened me about N.Ram's article was this observation of his. "The Narayan I knew would certainly have been far more pleased with the prospect of his debut novel, 'Swami and Friends" being in print in 2035, a hundred years after its publication, than with the celebration of his hundredth birthday." I, for one, am sure about one thing; if I am alive 29 years from now and if I have a small grandchild then, I would certainly be gifting the child a copy of 'Swami and Friends'.

A friend of mine and I had an argument recently. It all started with a letter drafted and signed by people like Amartya Sen, Vikram Seth, etc. It was a signature campaign to repeal Article 377 of Indian Penal Code that makes homosexuality a crime.

The man who drafted the letter wrote in a paper, "As a gay Indian one always feels like an outsider, ostracised. I felt like a criminal all the time.” IPC (which covers only the "unnatural" sex act, and mind you, only male ' not lesbian) apart, does a gay (including both male and female homosexuals) Indian really feel like a criminal socially and culturally in India? I don't think so.

This is one society which doesn't see anything unnatural in two men and two women hugging tightly or moving around with their fingers locked, or with arms around each other's shoulders. The society doesn't find anything odd if a man or a woman on the pillion holds the two wheeler rider tightly from behind. But the same society finds it alarming if a man and a woman hold hands or embrace in public.

Police have in the past arrested young boys and girls sitting close to each other in parks and beaches in Chennai, Lucknow and maybe in many other places. But the same police do not find anything odd if people of the same sex indulge in the same activities. For that matter, take any old Hindi film; all of them celebrate 'gay' behaviour unabashedly though not intentionally. Against this background, I don't understand how a 'gay' man in India feels like a criminal. What he does within the confines of private spaces may be a criminal offence but in public, 'gay' behaviour is quite 'normal'. In fact, it is the man who loves a woman- a natural feeling to have- who should be feeling like a criminal in India. Lovers are arrested and prevented from getting married, and they are treated as people worse than criminals.

Personally I feel homosexuality is unnatural and abnormal. The 'modern and cool' friend of mine was alarmed at my opinion and ridiculed me for not accepting homosexuality and lesbianism as a natural way of life. According to her, there is nothing unnatural in getting attracted to someone of the same sex as it has existed from Biblical times, though not sanctioned by the social or religious establishment. So what? Does that make it natural?

I may be called a woman belonging to the primitive ages but I don't care because I feel that same-sex-attraction is unnatural. Had it been natural, life would not have continued at all on earth both among human beings and animals. The natural thing is for the opposite sex to get attracted because that is the only way life perpetuates itself. Homosexuality is abnormal because normal human beings with normal hormonal levels do not get attracted to the same sex.

My 'cool' friend was also alarmed to hear about my opinion on the film 'Brokeback Mountain'. It was nauseating for me to watch two men make love. It was equally nauseating to watch two women make love in 'Fire'. That led me to search on the Internet what researchers and sociologists say on this subject.

After going through several studies, I found that there was no scientific basis to the 'born gay' theory and ALL researchers have dismissed this theory. A new research study by a University of Illinois team, which has screened the entire human genome, reported that there is no 'gay gene'. In the journal Human Genetics, researcher Dr. Brian Mustanski wrote that environmental factors were also likely to be involved.

Results of a study by Peter Bearman and Hannah Bruckner (Yale University) support the role of "social influences, reject the hormone transfer model, reject a speculative evolutionary theory, and are consistent with a general model that allows for genetic expression of same-sex attraction under specific, highly circumscribed, social conditions".

Going back to the letter that says gay men are treated as criminals in India, let me cite an example, that it is not so. During my walks, I used to see two women- one dressed in either sari or salwar kameez and the other in trousers and shirt- regularly, with their fingers locked all the time. The way they walked, the way they looked, the way they touched, there was something very odd. They looked and behaved more like lovers. One day, I saw the young girl kissing the elderly woman on her cheeks repeatedly and passionately as they walked. A couple of women who walked past them did not even give them a second glace. On the other hand, everyday I see walkers looking angrily at the young boys and girls engaged in love-talk as if they were committing the biggest crime on earth!