Telephone in the White House rang. “Hello Mr. Bush,” a heavily accented
voice says. “This is Santa down in Ludhiana, Punjab. I am ringing to inform
you that I am officially declaring war on you!”
“Well, Santa ,” Bush replies, “This indeed is important news! Tell me, how
big is your army?”
“At this moment in time,” says Santa after a moments calculation, “There is
myself, my friend Banta , my next door neighbour Gurinder and the entire
Kabbadi team from the Village. That makes 8!”
Bush sighs and says, “I must tell you Santa that I have 1 million men in my
army waiting to move on my word”
“OK,” says Santa . “I’ll have to ring you back!”
Sure enough, the next day Santa calls back.”Right Mr. Bush, the war is
still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!”
“What equipment would that be, Santa ?” Bush asks.
“Well, we have 2 combine harvesters, a bulldozer and Gill’s tractor from
the farm”
Once more Bush sighs and says, “I must tell you Santa that I have 50,000
tanks, 2000 minelayers, 10,000 armored cars and my army has increased to 1 and a half million since we last spoke”
“I’ll be dogged!” says Santa . “I’ll have to ring you back!”
Sure enough, Santa calls again the next day.”Right Mr. Bush, the war is
still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We’ve gotten out old
Govind’s crop sprayer with a couple of rifles in the cockpit and the Hockey
team has joined us as well!”
Once more Bush sighs and says “I must tell you Santa that I have 4000
bombers and 8000 high maneuverability attack planes and my military
installations are surrounded by laser guided surface to air missiles and
since we last spoke, my army has increased to 2 million.”
“Oh cripes,” says Santa . “I’ll have to ring you back”
Santa calls again the next day. “Right Mr. Bush, I am sorry to tell you
that we have had to call off the war”
“I’m very happy to hear that,” says Bush. “Why the sudden change of heart?”
“Well,” says Santa , “We’ve all had a chat and found that there’s no way we can cope with 2 million prisoners of war”
