pilgrim’s blog

Some times in our life we meet people about whom we don't know much and yet we end up telling them so much about ourselves. We may not even meet them in our life ever again and yet we feel a camaraderie. People whom I have met thus in the journey of my life are very few but those I have met in this manner have always left a good impression on me in one way or the other. Though I have not forgotten those friends of mine I have not been able to be in touch with them because most of the times I forget to take their address. We would have exchanged our deepest fears and insecurities or loss which even a close relative may not know but then once gone our different ways I have never met them again. Some times I do feel it would have been so good if I had been in touch with them even now but there is no way to get to them. And then I feel may be it is good that way because I have a very sweet memory of them which too much familiarity I fear may have spoiled.As human beings we tend to expect more and more from our relations that takes the charm away from them.Hence I would prefer to let go of them to see the relation getting sour. Such friends to me are like gifts which you open with so much excitement not knowing what to expect but it never lets you down because it is always something that you needed at that stage of your life. May be that lack of expectation is what makes these friendships so special. It has a feeling of lightness which helps you unburden and may be that is why due to what ever reason it may be, we lose it as fast as we find it as all good things do not last long and that is why they remain good. I cherish the memory of my such friends for being there for me when I needed someone the most and for  having let me be a part of their life also  and pray that they do well where ever they are and may God bless them always

I don’t want my feeling to echo any sign of sadness because it would be doing injustice to my friends for they have only made me happy as long as they stayed and it is what has inspired me to return it to others when they needed..

We were meeting after almost twenty years. I did not know what to expect. Would she be the same bubbly person she was or would she have changed ? The locality she had shifted to recently was unfamiliar to me. It was through a common friend that I came to know that she was settled in the same city as I was .We got in touch and decided to meet the next day. She suggested we meet for lunch at her place and it being a Saturday there was not much for me to do at the office. So finishing the little work that was allotted to me I left the office with a mixed feeling. Mixed because I was tensed and thrilled at the same time. She had told her father in law was also staying with her. So I knew I would have to restrain my excitement at seeing her. I rang the door bell. The door opens and what do I see my friend standing at the door not a wee bit changed. No how could it be ..The same pigtails, the same spectacles and lo the same smile. Was I dreaming? From behind her another head peeps out and I see an older version of the girl who opened the door. It takes only a split second for the truth to sink in. Unable to control ourselves we jump with joy. The girl who is an exact replica of what her mother looked at her age stole my heart at first sight. Her son who is a real pet was a pleasure to be with. I enjoyed every minute of the five hours I spent at her place listening to, her father in law's stories of his hometown in Bihar, her son's video games and her daughter's teen age talk that I savoured the most. The person with whom I spent the least time was my friend. Even her cocker spaniel would have spent more time with me that day. It was as if time traveled back that day. I had the great luck of reliving my teens through my friend's daughter. Promising to meet my friend out for lunch soon so that we could have time for our self I left my spirits soaring high. 

She is short tempered .She has mood swings. She is sometimes selfish. She is most of the time boastful. She acts as if she is bold. She is overbearing. She is haughty. She is stubborn .She is all this and more to others ..

She is sensitive. She is scared at the smallest incidents. She is vulnerable. She can't hurt others. She pretends to be strong. She is simple. She is shy. She hides deep thoughts behind the façade of the frivolous mind. She likes to take care of others when she cannot take care of herself. She fumbles for the right words.

She is my friend. Only I have seen her thus. So I cannot get angry with her for whatever she does .I am always patient with her .I let her think what she wants me to believe knowing well what she is in real. I do not discuss this side of hers to others for fear someone may hurt her. She is my only friend in the true sense.

And I love her more than I love anything else in the world .. is how my best friend would say.

My first day in the hostel. I was miserable. I was lonely. I had no one to speak to. The separation from my parents lay heavy on my heart. The new surrounding was not helping me feel better in any way. Immersed in my woes I failed to notice her watching me .

Came night and I became more restless .Not used to sleeping alone for I needed to feel my mom's arm across me to fall sleep ,I walked around wearing a lost ex-pression. The shadow of the Acacia near my window played games with my imagination frightening me to death. Again I failed to notice her watching me ..

As the days passed by I got accustomed to the hostel life. With hordes of friends and lots of pranks my days became busy. From having midnight feasts to scaling the hostel wall to run home being few of them. Yet I failed to notice her ..

She is quiet ..I am chirpy.

She is calm …I am spontaneous.

She is very good with dates .I forget even my birthday.

She is unassuming ..I am demanding.

She is my guardian angel .I am the trouble shooter.

Today we are in two ends of the world.  I did not realize her worth then. I curse myself for having taken her for granted . Inspite of our busy lives we find time to chat on line( thanx to science)and till date she worries thinking I would fail to take care of myself. How will I grow up when I have a friend like you.