Though i love my job but it is not something i wanted to be live with……. Sometimes i feel very anxious ….still so many places left to see & visit and so little time left. We are more involved in circumfery of life than the real nucleus, may be i have not braved with the required escape velocity to be get all out of this mess…. last day i met Rozier ,from germany, he was 58. From last 20 years he is travelling all over the globe. He has little land in germany where he grows vegetables and from its sale he is maintaing his livelihood. He told me that every year his bank balance keeps on increasing and he feel perplexed that how to expend this ` i have house, car and what more i need , i love to be with nature and i am enjoying my life with it. This is the most pleasing thing i found than any other materialistic thing`.

I wanted to have life like him , i really feel envy of him…lekin sayad , kabhi kisi ko mukallam jahan nahi milta…..

I never have understand this word `ambition`…..is there any limit of this? , is there any end of this?, Is accumulation of wealth and materialistic things is ambition?..what we need in life?…for me it is someting which make my life easy, smooth, happy and satisfying. I think the basic needs of life is very little and u can have meaningful life the minimum u have. Anything more than basic needs is offering of more pain than comforts from that…

This was one fine day of dec 1995, when i was visiting goa very first time.This day i planned for beaches of south goa. Scanning my maps and guidebooks i gathered that there are half a dozen other beaches adjoining main beach colva on its 20 km. long coastline. After getting down at colva and taking a dip into the sea, instigated of my naturalist`s and explorist`s instinct i move towards north. After walking half an hour along the coastline, i scummbed to the chasm and mystery lying behind the beaches which was strongly seducing my naturalists and explorists instinct. And this nebula not let me down–clean narrow roads,vast vast open crop fields, forests of palm trees, small portugeese houses amidst big-big gardens, very thin crowd, sleepy pace of life. This has everything to make me fall in love of this place. So next time in 1998 when i planned my goa visit i have only colva-benaulim-varca-cavellossim-mobor,stretch of villages in mind. Since then year after year this lovebond is going stronger and stronger. Now even little loss to nature of this place hurt my soul. Since 1995, the whole goa and this place suffered ills of so called development of mankind. Lots n lots of apartments,row houses, shops,hotels are cropping in and this are on cost of trees, forests, greenery, open spaces, crop fields. These concrete jungles are killing real beauty and chasm of goa. This all is taking every ounce of my heart and soul but i cannt do anything to prevent this. This all are running on simple theory of demand and supply. With the increase of population there are demands of hoses for shelter, shops,offices,hotels , factories to run their livelihood.So this for everyone who think and argues that bringing a child per family will not afect nature`s balance. No enough of enough , this planet canot cope with anymore increase in human population. When a human incarnated a body of flesh and bone s/he need house,school, bus,trains,roads,clothes, shops, factories etc, so with increase of one human there is increase in concrete jungles. Every living being needs a natural living space but with increase of population and concrete jungles area of this living space is depleting day by day which is adversely affecting every iota of us. Our education and upbringing are all responsible for this nature`s imbalance. All our educationused to be snippety fragmentary. We never got to look at the world in what may be called its togeatherness. We are not taught about even mankind as a whole. We used to learn abouta century or two about greek history, roman history, indian history but nothing about human race & nature in its entirity. Then a little geography, very little geology, a few facts of astronomy and smattering of physics and chemistry. But about the nature and world as whole-nothing. Though this is a essential thing a man should know. The one thing about which s/he should have the fullest knowledge is our relationship to the nature in which we find ourselves.

Like all the bad times in life, the good times also not stays longer…..finally 8 day long sojurn in goa came to an end. But it given me enough energy to face and fight the world for another six months. Today in the afternoon, we will leave for shirdi, then to return home on 4th through pune.

I dont know why i like sun setting in oceans. But i do it among my very few special likings…..

Today we went to beach for our usual daylong hangout at beach. We went to Concy`s shack on benaulim beach. The serving-boy Jhon, give us a big hugg to see us once again. How such small things gives us eternal happiness. The threat of terror attack has certainly affected the fun-n-fare here at beaches.The sun-beds which were lying right up to the water are restricted not only in numbers but also to its proximity with the sea. This complete 10 km long beach strych is covered by lifegaurds , at every 50 meters four gaurds are stationed -two on the beach and two in the water on water scooter. They are restricting the people to have bath in sea only between the flags they have put on the beach. Not allowing the people for to enter in sea after sunset. Who will tell the administration that before this year when there were no lifegaurds the things were running very normally and smoothly. They are only hampering the tourism in goa, which is the back bone of goan economy.

We enjoyed our day on the beach, bathing in the sea, taking our lunch on the beach, long walks, beach cricket and yes-reading. I love reading books which touches the soul. I keep on buying the books whenever i find any and i love reading them while travelling and here on the beach. Some weeks back while going to delhi i seen this book- Small little things and love. Today i finished 1/4th  of the book- really a touching stuff.

Today we visited Panjim, for heat belt, watched movie-Ghazini in INNOX, our fourth movie in this multiplex. Good movie . Did lot of shopping- chappals, bermuda, book—

Reached colva by 8 P.M.. Injection, dinner-palak panner, roti, dal,  

We went to market today, for some necessary shopping-heat belt, also visited Osnia Multiplex for watching GHAZNI, but it was full house. Gifted a wine bottle to Tony -our host as Xmas gift-u can see the big smile on his face. I know he is tetotller and nothing can be better gift than a wine bottle for him.

Harry, our next door neghbour every year, a prtugese who is visiting Goa consecutively for last 28 years for Xmas  and new year has not yeat come. His luggage is lying here. Dont know what happened wrong with him. We are staying in his room ( his room becuase he is staying in same room for last 28 years) but the day he will come we will shift in our room -the adjoining room.

Our Sagar Kinara restaurant wala - our `feeder` since it s opening here at colva in 2003he get happy to see us again.Our daily-shop, from where we buy water bottle,juice and snacks daily in the evening while returning from beach, the lady-the owner of the shop also had a great smile to see us once again.