Archive

Archive for the ‘Writing’ Category

Do Laina

February 28th, 2007

 

Well everyone must've heard of Chaar laina by the famous Surendra Sharma. I don't know if anyone had written Do Laina before or not but I am attempting to write one. I couldn't call it poetry (actually wanted to write it as a poem, but I just don't have that caliber), nor could I call it prose so chose to call it Do Laina. I couldn't stick to Hindi, so used a bit of other languages too…

Dosh

Galti maine ki
          Dosh auron ko diya

Fail main hua
          Dosh examiner ko diya

Bimaar main pada
          Dosh mausam ko diya

Kachraa maine phenka
          Dosh municipality ko diya

Vote maine kiya
          Dosh rajkarniyon ko diya

Rishwat maine diya
          Dosh officeron ko diya

Sota main raha
          Dosh alarm clock ko diya

Late main hua
          Dosh traffic ko diya

Baten main kiya
          Dosh telephone bill ko diya

Shararat maine ki
          Dosh brother-sisters ko diya

Gir main gaya
          Dosh raaste ko diya

Chot maine khaayi
          Dosh pathhar ko diya

Daaru mainey piya
          Dosh doston ko diya

Jua maine khela
          Dosh kismat ko diya

Bigadta main gaya
          Dosh zamaney ko diya


Yahaan tak ki



Martaa main gaya
          Dosh Bhagwaan ko diya

If I dont Blog………….

July 8th, 2006

Friends,
Presenting to you the first enviro friendly post in the world… this post has been made from 100% recycled material (means i have already posted it on 24.4.06) …….. it is non-polluting and 100% safe for consumption.
(i had promised that i shall not post any new posts… but i cud always post old blogs… old blogs in old bottle….ha ha ha)


Symptons


This thought came across my mind (assuming that people do read my blog) - that if my blog is not updated daily, you all may deduce that the reasons may be the following. The reasons are posted here so that you need not do any guesswork and also dont need any Sherlock Holmes’ mind to investigate.

If i dont post a blog for…………….

1 day - then, i am busy in office with a very heavy workload…no time to park myself on rediffiland. (except on sundays…no blogging on sundays..only sleeping…zzzzzzzzzz.)

2 days - then, got more work to do…meet deadlines….it’ll be harakiri for me if I leave my work and contemplate on what to write for my next blog.

3 days - then, it could be a bout of fever or a virus upsetting me etc.etc - minor health problem.

4 days - then, i could be out on an extended business trip and no time to sit on my blog.(getting time and place to check my emails alone would have made me grateful to god. i still dont have a laptop.)

5 days - could be away to a far away town to attend some distant cousin’s wedding or function. no chance to bbblog.

6 days - could have a pretty bad week with a combination of one or more of above reasons.

7 days - please be patient yaar. still thinking of some excuse.

10 days - third reason with more severity like typhoid etc.

12 - 15 days - my vacation. forget blogging. i am even forced to minimize my sms’s and also official calls. (i hope my wife doesn’t read this, otherwise i’ll have a lot of explaining to do.)

30 days - could have landed a jackpot and having a vacation on some distant exotic island(real island).    (rediffiland wot?)

45 days - please have some patience yaar. please do not delete me from friends list. i shall return. perseverence is the key.

60 days - time to call my folks and enquire if everything is alright with me. and then thank god that it is and start cursing me for being absent for so long.

90 days - Tapak gaya mamu. Khallas. Finish. Full stop. Kicked the bucket. You can delete me from your friends list forever - no guilt for doing so. I shall never return to make your lives more miserable (as if our govt. wasn’t trying hard enough).


(doobara mat poochna - thats me.)

And the love affair continues….

July 7th, 2006

 

And the Love Affair continues .

 

I hold you close to my heart. And never wish to leave you for a moment. I cherish every moment spent with you and look forward to doing the same for the rest of my life.

I listened in rapt attention to every word you said and the sweet nothings that you purred gently into my ears. I have obeyed your every beck and call..(ok, sometimes I dint, ok?).

I tended to you when you were sick and weak. And nurtured you back to good health.

You may reinvent yourself in different forms, but your soul shall remain the same. I have shared all my happiness, joys, sorrows etc. with you all these years. You touch and tickle me at all the right places. Sometimes you catch my attention even while remaining silent.

And I sincerely pray to God that we remain together till death do us apart.

 

 

Guys, before you start thinking something, let me clarify, I am writing about my first wife - my mobile and not Her.

 

 

Flash back .

Ironically, my first mobile was bought not for me to stay in touch when out, but to be used as a landline at home. Those BSNL guys (DoT in those days.) did not transfer my landline to my new residence citing technical reason (lines not free) at the new address. And no commitment as to when they will do so. BPL had just launched its service in Tamil Nadu at that time. I decided to go for it to be kept at home till I get my landline. Our house was located in a new suburb and I dint want my wife to feel afraid / lonely. First Handset? Motorola ' Amio. But it was as big as a brick. Could be doubled up as a self-defense tool, I mused. Only one Nokia model at that time ' 5110, a big black handset not much smaller that the Motorola set. I had even shelled out 2K to be network unlocked so that I could use it in other networks. In those early days, handsets were usually bundled along with subscriptions. Anyways there were not many shops selling h/s.

So for about a couple of months the mobile was immobile. I was given free talk time of 100mins beyond which I would be charged Rs.8.40 per minute. So strict instructions to my better half - phone to be used only in emergencies or for making short / curt calls. No gossiping. Not even with me. Nahin to zindagi beet jaayegi, sirf bill bharne mein. And it continued for a couple of months, after which the landline connection was provided. So now I used to keep the mobile with me. There was no particular use of mobile for me at point of time, but I used to keep it jus' for the sake of it. The specifications of the Motorola h/s were two line scrolling text display. Total of 8 mono ringer tones. Green backlit display. External Antenna. Weight ' 135gms approx. Man, am I laughing even as I type this here.

Once I had been to Karur (a town abt 120kms from Madurai). The bus tyre got punctured about 12kms before Karur. So all the passengers alighted, and waited for the driver to mend it. At that time, my mobile rang. Should have seen the surprise on most of the people's faces. We are in the middle of nowhere. And this guy is talking away to glory. Man, was I enjoying this.

Similarly, in another town called Tirunelveli, this funny incident happened. I used to have food there at a non-descript hotel, which used to serve very homely food. I was having breakfast. A phone rings. The owner picks up his landline and frantically punches the hang button. Nothing. I pull out my mobile and start talking. Should have seen that person's face. Quite wonderstruck. He just watched in amazement. Actually the BPL guys had just soft-launched their service there. So no one knew about mobiles much.

BPL was a very dynamic company. I used to admire their entire approach and pro-activeness. In fact in those early days, Airtel was just a minnow and BPL was considered a heavy-weight, a reputation which it justified for some years.

My next h/s was a Nokia 6110. That was quite compact compared to my first model. It came in handy, coz it could store up to 30sms in total. BPL had just launched the sms service (If I am not mistaken I think it was the first to do so in India). In fact we had to configure the message center no. manually in the message settings so as to enable to send and receive messages. We were offered this service free for couple of months initially. So my friends and me used to sms constantly. Much cheaper than talking. And it was fun too. Forget T9. You had to manually type out each and every letter. But still that didn't deter us crazy guys. We used to sms first in English. After that we also did so in Tamil, Gujju (typing out the same in English only.) that time there were not much sms fwds. We actually used to chat since it was free.

BPL then made outgoing calls 77paise and incoming free. All this when rest of the country used to pay about Rs.3-4 for both i/c and o/g. Our smsing did go down a bit because we now used to chat due to lower rates. But then slowly sms fwds used to come more and more. Among our circle of friends, we used to exchange any sms which we received from outside. Even after going paid, sms was just 25paise then. We used to send abt 100-200 sms every month so it used to cost between 25-50rs.

The growth got stunted at BPL after some time. So I surrendered my BPL and got a Airtel connection. That too lasted only for less than a year. BSNL launched its mobile services in a big way. I went for it. I used to travel to remote places and BSNL gave the maximum coverage in the shortest possible time at the most affordable rates. Their only sore point was laid back customer service.

I had a Nokia 6210 by then. I bought it solely because it had a gigantic capacity of 200sms. That was quite huge in those days. In fact the max. any mobile had. We could transfer the messages from our inbox to "My Folders". Wow wasn't that great? So I created separate folders to store them in groups. I was quite hooked to Nokia phones by now.

And the biggest mobile launch happened in India with the entry of Reliance. I was quite reluctant to subscribe to it in the beginning, but somehow found the scheme quite appealing. 400 STD minutes, free sms, great h/s (smallest at that point of time, with blue display ' the LG piece) etc. etc. So went for the Reliance connection.

It was the best package in terms of tariffs and services etc. Apart from very low voice charges, sms was almost free. From hence on, smsing was like a ritual followed everyday.

Day by day, smsing grew along with the no. of friends with mobiles and the content etc. So much so that, since the last year or two I clock around 2000+ sms sent every month. Sometimes 1500, sometimes 2500, but on an average 2000 every month. All sorts of messages make up my repertoire. Fun, friendship, motivational, ethnic, sardar, men-women, shairies etc. etc.

I am still fascinated by mobiles as I was when I bought my first h/s.

 

Actually, mobiles have become indispensable in our fast paced lives of today. Using it rationally will minimize the risks that we get exposed to while using a mobile phone. I actually spend about 15 days every year without my cell phone, when I go to my native place.

My wife enjoys those days. Blissful for her. For once she gets undivided attention from me, without competition from any innate object. Currently I find my 6230i a great companion. Very compact but has all the features of its bigger brothers.

Aspiring to upgrade to N91 / N93 as soon as I get a World Bank loan to fund the acquisition. But the latest news from there is that, they told they wont fund such small amounts.. so I told them that you may add half a dozen zeroes to that amount . You see, nowadays it's the season of giving out charity … so I too shall give out the remaining amount of my loan to charity .. wot say guys ?



(p.s: i shall continue with my observation series after one week only… guys i need a break…. one week into this, staying up till 2am was not what i had bargained for…but, i had an enjoyable and thrillin’ adventure at all the iLands… no doubt…. but now i need a break…. so no new posts for the next few days…. everybody have a nice and happy weekend…. and god bless me after he had finished blessing you all…. :)  )

 

English………..

April 27th, 2006

The Conversion to Euro English…

With the implementation of the Eurodollar underway in Europe these last few years, the European Union is trying to find new ways to standardize practices in Europe.

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty’s Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as “Euro-English”.

In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of the “k”. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with “f”. This will make words like “fotograf” 20% shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of doubleletters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent “e”s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”. During ze fifz year, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou” and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!

Easy………Difficult

April 22nd, 2006


Easy is to get a place is someone’s address book.
Difficult is to get a place in someone’s heart.

Easy is to judge the mistakes of others
Difficult is to recognize our own mistakes

Easy is to talk without thinking
Difficult is to refrain the tongue

Easy is to hurt someone who loves us.
Difficult is to heal the wound…

Easy is to ask for forgiveness
Difficult is to forgive others

Easy is to set rules.
Difficult is to follow them…

Easy is to dream every night.
Difficult is to fight for a dream…

Easy is to show victory.
Difficult is to assume defeat with dignity…

Easy is to admire a full moon.
Difficult to see the other side…

Easy is to stumble with a stone.
Difficult is to get up…

Easy is to enjoy life every day.
Difficult to give its real value…

Easy is to promise something to someone.
Difficult is to fulfill that promise…

Easy is to say we love.
Difficult is to show it every day…

Easy is to criticize others.
Difficult is to improve oneself…

Easy is to make mistakes.
Difficult is to learn from them…

Easy is to weep for a lost love.
Difficult is to take care of it so not to lose it.

Easy is to think about improving.
Difficult is to stop thinking it and put it into action…

Easy is to think bad of others
Difficult is to give them the benefit of the doubt…

Easy is to receive
Difficult is to give

Easy to read this
Difficult to follow

Easy is keep the friendship with words
Difficult is to keep it with meanings.