Ant R

There is nothing more in here 
Whatever was, is either frozen 
decayed, destroyed or dead 
There must have been something, 
that has, over time 
sucked it all out 
leaving behind this hollow carcass 
soulless but not lifeless 
Should have been a painful state to be in
If only I felt a thing 
But alas, that’s what the pain is all about

Leftovers from the previous night 
And the million nights before 
Of gruesome introspection 
Amidst the jarring clang of contradictions 
bleakest of conclusions
inflicting agonistic decisions 
Immersing in their aftermath 
gives far from content 
just sheer torment 
Molestation of the mind 
Collective, repetitive 
As the winding hands 
play silent witness 
 to this test of endurance 
perhaps laying a bet 
on an immolation or vain
And of those million nights
I am all that [...]

Heart cooks up tales
of hope and light -
Culinary brilliance
out of absolute nothingness
Mind feeds on,
misled, unmindful 
content, 
slips into blissful slumber
While heart is at work
‘Feels good’ for a living
tempted smiles
induced glee
festival of dreams
Mind stirs up, 
tormented by cackles
of happy reverie
rubbing eyes in disbelief
aghast at the mess…
Heart’s now a slave 
to the seasoned mind
The pain shared by both
Mind has a heart of [...]

Someday
I shall be free from 
all annoyable things
surrounding me
and features
The face and this nose
and the colour of my skin
and those calves
misplaced bulges
And people around
their voices
deafening noises
all around and within
and this mind
that thinks too many thoughts
and the heart that hurts
and strays
the eyes that tire
of seeing too much
This life that hums 
an endless monotone
its only variations 
being off key, way [...]

Sometimes you pin your hopes On unworthy things and eventually move onLeaving behind a fraction of an ounceof hopeUnknown to youIn that Godforsaken landAnd you revere it as a gentle reminder Of your failures and wasted emotionsStill savouring the bitternessBit by bit, by bitUntil one sudden morningIts all gone, leaving a fraction of a voidAt [...]

Wonder what it feels like
when the cold muzzle touches the brow
to listen to one’s own breath
a heavy count backwards
an end to a long fight
wonder what goes on inside
All that mess
behind eyes shut tight
Perhaps circles of light
With faces inside
Scenes from the past
washed away into oblivion
Everything that remains
Muted by one final blast
Some peace at last

So when night falls
And the beast is out
On the prowl
Lethal red eyes
Silver fangs and all
On his hunt not to prey
But to endure his time
among these surly beings
and things, not one he owns
nor wishes to own
All he seeks is a dream
of stirring from this night
into a bright new dawn
into a world of tranquil
Where sins are sins 
mistakes, [...]

Dream-borne

I soar

Amidst pink clouds

Soft tender fluffy

Shines the early morning sun

On me and me alone

I float on and along with the winds

My day breezes through 

Without much a do

And then night falls

and clouds dissapear

Only distant stars in the clear sky

And the cold moon shine 

On the hostile planet

Creatures howling by

In the wilderness of the streets

Through creepy crawly alleys

And [...]

Smile at me 
I tilt my head at you
Walk up to me
In that easy gait of yours
Gently touch my fingers
Entwine them with yours
Tighten your grip
As we walk along
Bright-lit city roads
Under a dim-lit urban sky
Lend me your shoulder
Rest my weary head
Caress my sleepy curls
Breathe into my ears
Hold me 
Comfort me
Nudge me 
Shake me
Slap me 
Dunk me 
Drown me
Wake me up!

Then

The sun shone bright
the world was new
the self was fresh as dew
the soul was free
there was no fear
and qualms were far and few

Wide starry eyes
pounced as they chanced
upon all things astray
Obscurity eyed
With ravenous greed
Unraveled till they lay

Now

The eyes have lost 
their glint and spark
the mysteries gone and dead
The tired soul
now looks no more
for things it left [...]