thopes’s blog

"Want a condom?" he asked.

Uh…  Wazzat?" She responded taken aback.

"I mean to say that do you need condoms?" He mumbled on.

"And why should you be giving them to me?" she quizzed a bit irritated.

"Because …errr we are running an AIDS awareness campaign as part of our CAS activity and we are therefore distributing condoms to spread word of the importance of practicing err safe sex", He hurriedly completed his sentence, only twice looking up to meet her eyes.

"So you study in which school and what exactly is this CAS?" She asked twisting the scooter key around her well-manicured fingers.

"CAS is Creativity, Action and Service and it is a part of our curriculum in New Era International School and we undertake certain projects for general good of the society each month and this month  it happens to be AIDS awareness month", He launched into an explanation awkwardly.

He was distributing condoms in his school uniform and he had chosen the gates of a discotheque as his appropriate venue. On seeing the helmeted figure alighting from a scooter he had approached with his goodies. He was however embarrassed to see that he had actually approached a beautiful, short-haired girl in her late twenties or early thirties, wearing a hip-hop male rock-star's costume, complete with the heavy metallic chains and steel bracelets.

 "So you are advocating safe sex, eh? Do you know what sex is like in the first place?" She queried almost hissing out her words.

He dug his shoe-tips into the ground and meditated on an appropriate response.

She grabbed his hands and started dragging him towards the discotheques gates.

"Come; enjoy life first, young fella! Then go on the streets waging a war against AIDS! You are too young to get into such serious issues and spoil your exuberance for life.

What do you say?" she lectured and asked him in a playful manner

"Come you be my escort for the day and I will help you pass through those bloody guarded gates with a wink of my eyes at those hulks. Are you game?" She queried

"I am sorry I am not dressed for the occasion", he tried to make a lame excuse.

"Oh, don't ya worry about your damn prep school uniform. I'll cook up some story about a fancy dress theme we are having amongst us friends for the night. Awww come on, you cannot let such an opportunity pass. Have you been to a hip and happening disco like this one ever? You are not even eighteen, I guess. So I'll sponsor all the booze and smoke for you. You just hang on to my arms and see the magic unfold. I am bored of those usual escorts I have and would enjoy dancing away this night with you", she smiled a suggestive smile, playfully lisping her words and running her sharp nails delicately against his forearm.

He suppressed his flustered look with an idiotic smile. Then he thought what the heck! This was a golden chance and he couldn't let it pass without giving it a try. He loosened up his tie and gave an answering nod with a nervous smile playing across his lips.

They proceeded towards the hulks guarding the gates but as they were about to step in two strong arms prevented them from moving further and they faced the raised eyebrow on a fierce face of one of the hulks.

"Ok Ok take it easy" She said to them. Then she turned to him and smiled a wonderfully smug smile like a school-girl caught in her act. "We'll find something else to do. I tell ya, let's go back to my small hide-out and watch a movie on the DVD and spend a quiet evening together. O.k.? And we can do some dancing too. I've a good music system at home. Are you coming, young chap?" She asked.

He took one look at her disarming smile and said yes.

He took a pillion ride on her scooter and as the vehicle sped past the neon lights of the advertising boards, his face glowed with anticipation of an exciting evening. Myriad thoughts raced across his virile mind and he wondered what story he will have by the end of the evening to relate to his friends the next day. He had never ever been this close to a feminine body and her fragrance tickled his senses and sent a tingling sensation down his spine as he drank it from the cool air that blew across his face. He prepared to spend a fantasy filled evening, pregnant with exciting possibilities.

They reached her small hide-out which was a one-bedroom flat in the suburbs of the city. As he entered he saw a well-kept room that boasted of a show-case stacked with books, DVDs and CDs standing against the wall, opposite to which lay a single comfortable sofa in blazing red colour with a few cushions thrown on it, which were a contrast in virgin white. The walls of the room were painted in a pleasant lemon yellow and a single large painting adorned its wall, overhanging the sofa ''a painting of a collection of red roses in a black vase against a window sill'. As soon as he entered she closed the door behind them and locked it.

As he settled down on the cushioned sofa, she went to the showcase and fished out a wine bottle from one of its drawers and set it down on the small round glassy top of the centre-table. She brought two wine glasses from the kitchen, screwed open the wine bottle and began to fill the delicate glasses with the red liquid. Then she handed one glass to him and he accepted it with shaking and sweaty hands. She glided gracefully across to the showcase again and chose a DVD to play on her music system. When the soft song wafted out from the music system she gave him an inviting glance and gestured him to come and dance with her. He rose to her command and joined her, swaying slowly to the rhythm of the music while his pulse raced and his heartbeats thumped in his chest in raw excitement. Being close to her body he realized that underneath those loose fitting hip hop clothes she had a petite and thin body that could be easily cocooned in his athletic arms. They danced for a while, in between, taking breaks to sip the wine. Words were not exchanged and the silence stoked the fire of excitement in his mind with each passing minute. Then she abruptly stopped the music and inserted a disc into the video system and sank down on the sofa gesturing him to join her at her side. He settled down beside her, their bodies barely touching each other.

The heady effect of the wine and the romantic movie started giving him ideas and he wanted to explore further the possibility of his chances at taking his physical closeness to her one step further. Gathering courage, he slowly picked up his hand and tremblingly placed it on her thigh feeling the warmth of her skin through the thick clothes. She turned to him and smiled sweetly. The boom of his heart-beats now echoed in his warm ears and he was flushed with excitement by her response. Then she slowly picked up his hand and lifted it towards her face and started stroking her cheeks with it. Finally she carefully placed his hand back on his thigh and looked at him with a strange look across her face.

"I have a deep dark secret to tell ya", she said. What if I tell you that I am suffering from AIDS? She asked in a quiet tone.

He froze as if bitten by a snake. His mind tried to assimilate the significance of the information she had shared with him while his body withdrew from any contact with her body. He knew he wanted to get up and bolt through the door but he was stuck to his chair.

"Are you telling me the truth?" He managed to blurt out.

"Yes, I am a HIV positive person" she said in a tone of finality. "Now you probably want to leave, eh? I know you are already running away from me in your mind.  Look, I had no intention of fooling you into any foolhardy act tonight. I just wanted to give you a practical lesson to show you the real danger of AIDS that exists in our society and the careless attitude that people in general possess about its dangers. So now you would work more effectively in spreading the word of awareness all through out your life, not just for the sake of some social service activity as part of your school curriculum. Forgive me for giving you such a rude shock but I am sure now you will never ever forget to use all the precautions for your own self too, if and when the need arises. Whatever you learn in classrooms is all very good but real life has a more effective way of making you sensitive towards such issues. So young man, you can pick up your bag and leave and work sincerely to spread the word. It is not only about distributing free condoms, it is basically about being responsibly aware of the dangers at every nook and corner of life. Take care", so saying she unlocked the door and held it ajar for him to leave.

 And just as he was hurriedly leaving she called from behind and said, "Hey! Yes, can you do something about the rotten attitude that people possess towards HIV positive people? Maybe you can change yours a bit too! You did not even thank me for the evening or mention a sweet goodbye. Anyways, Good night and sweet dreams!

"Jaiprakash uncle!" little Raju shouted at the top of his voice.

Jaiprakash uncle turned halfway and squinted through his glasses to look at him. He located the source of the voice, gave a big wink of recognition and delight and moved towards him with wavering steps. Then suddenly he collapsed on the ground in a heap and lay there with his face pulled to one side and his limbs unmoving on the other side. He had had a cerebral stroke.

With some difficulty they pulled his rotund figure into the ambulance van and drove off to the nearest nursing home in the city. Little Raju wept as the ambulance sped off into the distance. He was afraid of losing his dear friend.

Jaiprakash Kapoor and Raju were separated by an age-gap of seventy years but their similarity in disposition had brought them together a couple of years back. They shared a passion for practical jokes and so the eighty year old sprightly septuagenarian and the ten year old wily youngster pulled many a fast one on unsuspecting neighbors in the society complex.  Both of them had a naughty prank up their sleeve and spent many a day planning and executing them in unison. Sometimes they stuck funny messages on the windows of cars or rang doorbells of neighbors and scooted off and engaged in many such acts that gave them the opportunity to laugh aloud together.

Both of them also had a sweet tooth each which tempted them to raid refrigerators of their respective houses every now and then for chocolates, sweets or pastries. Raju's mother who tended to be home most of the time conveniently turned a blind eye to such thefts whereas at Mr. Kapoor's son's house the daughter-in-law never failed to rake up the issue, whenever she could, making her displeasure clear sounding loud concerns for Jaiprakah's diabetic status.

Raju and Jaiprakash also flew kites together and discussed and watched cricket with passion; often times when Raju played with his friends, Jaiprakash would watch and encourage him from the sidelines. Death was watching from the sidelines as well, as Jaiprakash played around with life and the ten year old kid with equal abandonment. It decided to issue a warning and so Jaiprakash's uncontrolled diabetes created the havoc in his system and that gave him the cerebral stroke he suffered. Little Raju went visiting, at the nursing home, with his parents and overheard conversations that mentioned Jaiprakash's sweet eating habit to be responsible for his misfortune. Raju vowed that day to steer clear off any kind of sweet henceforth.

His mother tried to show him sense but he wouldn't even touch sugary sweet milk. He simply stopped consuming anything that was even remotely sweet. Not only did he give up sweets but he also compromised with the humour in his life and turned serious and contemplative after the incident. He started keeping more to himself and avoided friends. Jaiprakash partially recovered and came back to his house but with his left leg and left hand partially incapacitated with lack of power he could hardly move about the house, leave alone moving out of it. The common string that had held them together as friends was slowly untying itself as now they could not conspire to play their practical jokes on people or fly kites. They sometimes watched and discussed cricket but that was not enough glue to keep them together for long. They slowly drifted apart until one day Raju fully stopped visiting Jaiprakash at home.

Then one fine summer afternoon, Jaiprakash breathed his last but just before that he gave a letter and parcel to his son instructing him to give it to Raju. When Raju received the parcel and letter he felt guilt-ridden for his insensitivity in abandoning the friendship midway. When he read the letter it told him that the parcel contained a family fortune that Jaiprakash wanted to bequeath to his best friend and he wrote further about how valuable and essential a thing it was for Jaiprakash in his long life of eighty years. Raju felt guiltier and cursed himself for having let go of the frail hand of friendship that had been offered to him by the spirited man. He felt that he was not worthy of receiving any such fortune from the great soul. On opening the parcel Raju found in it a chunky chocolate bar and a full set of false dentition with the message "smile" written across a small chit of paper stuck on it. The practical prank's surprise helped him recover his wits and made him smile at the ironies of life.

The day dawned in hues of red, yellow and orange. The sky resplendent in the multiple hues awakened Shalini from deep slumber. She crept out of bed silently and glided into the bathroom to freshen up. As she emerged, beads of water trickling down the side of her half-wiped face, she lovingly glanced towards her darling husband lying on the bed, flopped on his stomach and breathing softly against the pillow. Then she slipped into the other room to start off her yoga and meditation.

In her meditation, the yearnings of her life took recognizable shapes and danced in her mind, telling her what she missed in her daily living and how she compromised with her dreams. She missed her husband of yesteryears. True, he was more mature in years now and so some changes could have been expected compared to when they started off as young lovers but off-late he seemed to have withdrawn so much into himself that she felt terribly lonely even in his presence. She somehow molded her mind to accept his cold behavior and peacefully accept it, giving him the freedom to grow at his own pace and thereby making peace with her own thirsting and turbulent mind. By meditating she tried to accept the thirst in her life as a challenge she had to overcome.

Naushad, her husband had been a pillar of support for her all these last ten years of marriage. He had been the joker of the family who inevitably juggled matters of serious relevance with ease and made light of daily hassles, making life worth a loud laugh or two everyday. Shalini had a tendency to become despondent whenever a minor or major crisis befell the family but Naushad would lighten her burdens by his inimitable style of quoting "shayaris" or cracking jokes directed at his own self. The fact that they failed to become parents was an issue that Shalini could have used as an excuse to wallow in self'pity for a lifetime but Naushad's attitude washed away her despondency and replaced it with a pragmatic view of things.

Off-late however she had noticed a perceptible change in his behavior. She had never seen him so irritable or silent. He would lie on the bed hours after hours reflecting on some matter, in serious contemplation, but when asked, he would refuse to share his worries with her. Was it disenchantment with her, she wondered? Or was it that his job as a software engineer was not paying him the dividends he expected or its nature was not as satisfying anymore? Or is the vacuum in his life of being an issue-less human being weighing heavy on his mind? Shalini tried to probe the reasons for his change in behavior but each time, he snubbed her into silence or simply avoided discussion on the issue quoting some trivial job problem. She even suggested that they go in for adoption but he immediately poured water on her ideas by snapping at her, saying she didn't understand the responsibilities that come with parenting.

Shalini had known him for thirteen years now. Theirs had been a whirlwind romance of three years before it culminated in an elopement and marriage. Being of two different communities they did not expect their parents to be in agreement of their plans to tie the knot with each other and so as soon as Shalini finished post graduation he suggested elopement and guided by the voice of her heart she decided to plunge into the unknown depths of a relation she valued as priceless. He was a rising star in his soft-ware company back then and she had her dreams tied to his, believing that once they had shown themselves as successful and normal human beings their conservative parents would come around to accept them. For the first few years they were viewed as two headed monsters that had defiled their respective religions but slowly perceptions changed and  the rapid rise of Naushad in his company to an extremely good position as project manager saw the ice melt and families being re-united.

 Naushad, however, seemed to be changing colors and losing his old charm with people. He seemed to becoming more and more introverted with each passing day and Shalini worried for him and her own self. She started having these panic spells where she would imagine that Naushad had found another woman and with nothing to hold him back, he was about to dissolve his marriage to her soon. She started worrying about her own dependent status and found herself wishing to land a respectable job somewhere to shake off her feeling of helplessness. But Naushad would hear nothing of it and told her in no uncertain terms that it was not easy for her to navigate the turbulence of the wild, wild world outside of the home.

One day when she returned from the market she found him at home with a couple of men who looked unfamiliar to her. As soon as she entered he shooed her off to the inner rooms. She tried to overhear their conversations but failed. They left after a while but the incident changed Naushad even more. The next week he suggested divorce to her and she almost collapsed on the spot. Why?! She wanted to know the reason but he was not forthcoming. He tried to cook up some story about disillusionment with the marriage but she was not ready to believe him. Then the fights started and the silly arguments over trivial issues would lead to finger pointing and flying accusations that created so much ruckus that neighbors started listening in on to their maladies. Try as she might, he was not citing any reason for their need for a divorce and she concluded that it was the arrival of another woman into his life that turned him hostile towards her. She almost began to hate him for being such a turn coat and making light of the commitment they had made to each other on the altar of marriage. After a lot of contemplation and with no signs of any change in his behavior she decided to take some time away from him and give their relation the much needed break it needed. She set out for her parents' house.

Weeks passed in agony. She waited for a message, a small sign from him. Nothing was forthcoming. She was almost on the verge of resigning to her fate. She decided one dark night that she had compromised her dignity enough and would next day take charge and file papers for divorce proceedings. Next day she woke up red-eyed and picked up the morning newspapers with her usual cup of tea and lo! Right on the front page was all the explanation she needed for Naushad's sudden change in attitude towards her over the last six months. The thirty-five year old, promising, software engineer was shot dead at point blank range at his residence by unidentified assailants last evening and the reason cited by the police indicated that he was at the receiving end of a terrorist attack because he refused to co-operate with them in lending his software expertise to their organization. He was being harassed by them since one year and only couple of days back he had filed a complaint at the nearest police station regarding the same. The police declared that he had died the death of a martyr, serving his nation in the most upright and dedicated manner possible for a civilian. His widow shriveled up with shame and turned limp on reading the article in the newspaper. She sank to the ground to mingle with the dirt and her hapless form begged forgiveness for her ignorance from her unseen God. The terrorist's gun had found an unsuspecting victim too!   

I abandoned the last story on the note of a new beginning for the young lovers and now I am posting another short story. Thanks for all the appreciating comments in my last post. Hope you enjoy this one too!

The broken pencil

Little Rahul eyed the pencil with envy. It lay in Navin's pencil-box tall, lanky, new and shiny. Rahul's mouth was shaped in a half formed pout, his eyebrows were slightly knotted and his eyes had that drooling greedy ex-pression when Miss Swati spotted him sitting idle. She immediately shouted his name to make him jump out of his skin and it served to return all his attention back to the class work laid out in front of him. The alphabets' jungle did not bother his ever growing brains but right now he was more muddled by the problem he had created for himself in the shape of the pencil that he had spotted in Navin's pencil box. It was a beauty - shaped in the form of the magic wand in the most popular TV show on for kids and Rahul had wanted it ever since he had seen the advertisements for it. Navin was using a similar one to do his work. Rahul's mind writhed in envious agony.

As Rahul did his work, he day-dreamed about having the pencil in his hands and wielding its magic prowess on the paper. He wanted to swish it in the air with a flourishing wave and feel the power of owning an illusory magic wand. But he did not know how to wrest it out of his best friend's possession without creating uproar in the class. So he conspired and perspired over the matter till the idea came to him with tempting clarity. It did not matter to him that he was lagging behind in his work; he deliberately dug deep into his notebook with his own pencil till its lead gave way and broke with a crack. Then he got up to complain to Miss Swati.

"Teacher, my pencil is broken; can I have another one from Navin?"

"But you can use the sharpener to reuse your pencil, can't you?" the teacher asked.

"But I don't have a sharpener."

"Here is my sharpener", said Navin with overt helpfulness, "Use this to sharpen it."

Quietly taking the sharpener, he settled down to sharpen his pencil but each time it got to the point of being ready to use, he gave a sharp tweak to break its sharpened end. He continued doing it till his pencil was reduced to the size of his thumb. Then he got up again.

"Teacher, my pencil is now too small to use. Why can't I borrow Navin's extra pencil?" he asked.

"O.k. Navin, give him your extra pencil for use, then you can claim it back at the end of the day", the teacher said.

"But But " Navin reluctantly agreed and fished out his new pencil and gave it to Rahul who was now grinning from ear to ear.

So the power of the magic pencil remained in his tiny little hands for two more periods during which he admired its smooth flow and power grip, which was more an illusion of his mind than anything else. Then the classes ended and it was time for Navin to claim his precious property back and so he did. Rahul had some more tricks up his sleeve and  gave him a blank look.

He said, "But the pencil is nowhere to be seen. It did a disappearance act and vanished in thin air. Dear dost, I am so sorry but I seemed to have done something to upset it and that's why it has disappeared from my hands."

"But but it cannot be. It was not a real magic pencil", Navin cried out.

"Oh, it certainly was, otherwise how can it disappear just like that in front of everyone's eyes? You don't know anything about magic pencils. You can search my bag if you don't believe me", Rahul argued.

Navin was almost at the verge of tears but seeing the determined look of his classmate and squirming under the peering eyes of the interested audience consisting of the other boys and girls in the class, who seemed to be fascinated by Rahul's story, he backed off and trudged out of the class disappointedly. Now Rahul and Navin were neighbors in the same flat and they traveled in the same bus, seated together everyday, but today they preferred to keep a fair amount of distance between themselves. Their friendship had developed cracks.

 Rahul triumphantly returned home and immediately rushed to his room to change clothes. He warded off help from his mommy and tried to undress himself. He recovered the magic pencil from under his vest and carefully placed it aside. The whole evening he played the pretense game of wielding the magic powers of the pencil and entertained himself. But at the end of the day he was worried about going to school the next day and showing up with the pencil which he had claimed to have disappeared by magic. He decided to leave it at home.

Next day he went to school with a new pencil of his own and all day he tried to ignore Navin's hurt looks. The two friends sat apart in the bus again on the way to school and back home. By the end of the day, Rahul was somewhat disappointed that he had bargained his friendship with his best friend in exchange of owning possession of the pencil and now he found himself helpless to re-forge the same kinship in any manner. He silently prayed to God to somehow cement the cracks in his relation with Navin. As soon as he reached home he started looking on the table for the pencil but he was disturbed when he couldn't find it after a long search. He looked over and under the table, he scanned the dusty unders of the rug on the floor and searched the musty corners of the cupboard. At last he turned to help from his savior in such exasperating situations- his mummy, to help locate the pencil and as soon as he spotted her in the kitchen he questioned her. At first his mother seemed to ignore his desperate enquiries but when his queries became persistent she turned her attention to the matter. She contemplated on the issue and said that as far as she could remember she had gone to Navin's mother's house with a pencil to write a recipe she wanted and perhaps she had left the pencil behind in her hurried forgetfulness. Rahul was dejected and more so because he had lost the chance of returning the pencil back to Navin and renewing their friendship by telling him the truth and saying sorry to him. Also he was worried that now Navin would know the truth that the pencil in fact had been snitched by his best friend and he would never ever talk to him again.

Next day morning, Navin met Rahul with a big grin and came excitedly to him.

He said, "Rahul you were right about the magic pencil. It indeed has magic powers. The day it disappeared I prayed a lot to God to bring it back to me but I did not believe that I would ever get it because I thought you had taken it. But yesterday the pencil came back to me like magic and no one in our house knows how it got there on the table top in the living room. Isn't it magic? I am sorry dost, I doubted you. Lets become friends again."

Rahul nodded his head in silent and enthusiastic confirmation and he glowed with happiness within him. He knew God had found the way to repair the broken relationship which he had managed to spoil with the help of a broken pencil.

Full circle-contd a conclusion or a new beginning!(refer to previous two posts)

As the shoot proceeded, Raja felt the oncoming of a headache around his knitted eyebrows. The constant effusive compliments from Jhankaar's mother and the rest of the audience were adding to his discomfort. He decided to get up and leave the premises without much delay. He drove straight to his home and abruptly informed his parents about the cancellation of plans before heading straight to the privacy of his room. He would have preferred to flop down on the bed with his favorite rock-band playing in the background but the dirt and grime of the day refused to let him relax with its sticky presence, so he decided to take a bath and refresh himself.. The shower cooled his senses and soothed his ruffled mind. He stepped out of the bath only to look face to face with his mother, who stood in the doorway, with an upset and determined look on her face which he knew he couldn't escape. She came to him and asked gently about his abrupt change of plans implying that they had a right to know, given their involvement in the matter.Raja revisited the disappointment he had felt on seeing his dream-girl go the same way he would have preferred her not to take and confessed to his mother, in no uncertain terms, that the marriage plan was off. Then he went off to sleep to escape the harsh realities of the day.

Raja awoke with a start when the phone rang and fumbling for it around him he discovered it under his pillow. He knew who it was before he had even looked at it and so he gruffly said "hello", wasting the least amount of sentiment in it. Though he was angry and lackadaisical in his brief talk with Jhankaar over the phone, he felt the pangs of grief in his heart as soon as he said goodbye and expressed his inability to meet her for the next few weeks. He was pretty sure she had got the message that he was not interested in furthering the affairs of the heart with her anymore. She sounded confused and disappointed but he guessed she would get over it in a hurry because of her newfound career and its demands. For him, getting over her became an ordeal. Her haunting face and incredible sweetness enveloped his memories and it blanketed his mental capacities so as to affect his work. He couldn't seem to concentrate on his work and felt the dreary life wearing him out intolerably. She continued to flit in and out of his waken and sleeping memory and the pall of gloom of an impending break up with her refused to let him relax.

Raja's mother noticed the change in her son. She wanted to help but didn't know how. She understood the man's mentality who visualizes his woman as the home maker whose dreams would center on her man and his hearth, for she had married one such man. She recollected the grouse that Raja's father had nurtured against her for being a dedicated journalist in the initial phase of their marriage. In doing her journalistic work she sure had compromised on family life and her husband had taken offence to it after a few years when their son attained the toddler's age and was ready to go to school. He was of the opinion that it would be more sensible for the mother to use her talents and knowledge to further her child's dreams than her own dreams. She had given up her promising journalistic career and shifted focus completely to her child and his upbringing. In spite of the years that had gone by since she took that decision, she still felt the emptiness in her soul for having forsaken her individual dream. She decided to communicate it to Raja for the sake of widening his understanding of worldly matters and if possible, to sensitize his manly beliefs to the reality of a woman's desires. She waited for his return from his office that day.

The whole evening Raja listened to his mother speak about her desires and dreams as a young lady and how on losing it she had reconstructed her life around him. He detected her bitterness for having had to forsake her aspirations and the tears that threatened her eyes, as she spoke, opened his eyes to the fact that the years gone by had not dimmed her desires to have achieved something for herself and the disappointment at not being able to do it gnawed away at her soul as she survived all these years on borrowed dreams and aspirations. Next day dawned on the enlightened young fellow and he got up, brushed and readied himself to face the day with a refreshed attitude. On his way to the office he found time to drop in a high end cosmetic shop and there he purchased an array of foreign cosmetics and got it packed delicately. Then he called Jhankaar and requested her to make time to meet him in the evening and told her that he was carrying a gift for her that he would like to give as soon as possible.

Contd (refer to previous post)

The week-end arrived with deliberate slowness for the waiting lovers. They talked with ease and comfort about an umpteen number of things, relevant and irrelevant. They discussed family and career plans, exchanged compliments and almost stepped on the altar of discussion regarding matrimonial dreams. It was like taking off from somewhere they had left off earlier. Raja presented her with the exquisite hair-pin and she accepted it with grace .Raja already knew that she had no immediate career plans and was whiling away her time with friends and family. She also confessed to being interested in painting and pottery. He told her about his own career as a set-designer with an advertising firm and then they discussed more about family and friends. Gathering a lot of moments to cuddle in their memories and with a promise to meet again, they said goodbye with a feeling of fulfillment filling up a lacunae somewhere deep in their hearts.

Raja started weaving dreams around her, gathering from the information he had garnered in the first encounter and he was pretty sure after the first meeting that this was a relation worth being pursued to the next plane. He could envision her as his painter wife.  He knew his parents were getting impatient about his marriage and he now believed he had found the girl he wanted to make his wife. He was not really looking forward to a period of romance and passion before marriage and considering the fact that she seemed a simple girl with simple ambitions, he had reasons to believe that she was prepared for marriage too. So he shamelessly conjured up images of their union in his dreams and planned to propose matrimony to her in the next meeting. The next meeting's date was yet to be finalized and suddenly he had an idea to surprise her with a visit to her home with his parents and further his plans of marrying her as soon as possible! Even as they talked on phone, he mentioned about a surprise in store for her. In a couple of days she reiterated with her own claim of having a big surprise in store for him too. Now he could not wait any longer to meet her but keeping his surprise plan in mind he kept dilly dallying and postponing things. She too seemed non-demanding and comfortable with the stalling of the next meeting.

Then the day that Raja planned to execute his idea arrived. After work he was supposed to pick his parents, whom he had taken into confidence and drive to her place. The last day of the week was pretty hectic and he tried to add that last minute glitz and glamour to the set as they prepared for the shoot of the advertisement for the new fairness cream being launched with a fresh new face. He couldn't concentrate but since he loved his work he managed to put up that dreamlike set that satisfied the clients and the photographer. Now it was just time to sit back and watch the shoot progress. The model coordinator hovered around, boasting of his new found discovery and they all waited for the new model to emerge from her van. As she did , Raja felt the earth shake under his feet as he looked straight into the eyes of his dream-girl, done up in the exact plastic and artificial manner that all the models are transformed into with loads of makeup. He kept opening and shutting his mouth like a fish as Jhankaar hurried over to his side. As she blabbered something about the happy co-incidence and the major turn of luck for her, he heard his dreams crashing around him. She told him how she had had the good luck of having been introduced to the model coordinator through a family friend and how he had instantly proposed to her the idea of modeling and having nothing much to do for the moment she felt it was like a blessing being handed down to her. Then she introduced her mother, who seemed much more excited than her daughter and she too talked of the big chance that had befallen her daughter and expressed happiness at meeting him. Raja felt nauseated and just about managed to smile a silly smile. Everyone fussed around the new model and praised her looks trying to make her comfortable. Raja stayed rooted to his seat and tried to clear his fuzzy head. The shoot proceeded and she gave beautiful shots, one after another, almost like a professional and everyone thought that a star was being born right in front of their eyes; all except Raja, who sat there tasting the bitterness of his dissolving dreams and saw his life coming a full circle again.   

Full circle

He sat there drinking his coffee and eating up his friends' words but his sharp eyes were fixated on a girl sitting two tables away, talking nine to a dozen with her group of friends and nodding her head in short frequencies, in apparently absorbed participation.

But he had noticed her glancing his way occasionally and he did detect a change in her ex-pressions, the ever so delicate lowering of eyelashes and slight rising of eyebrow that suggested her awareness of his staring presence. The awareness kept him engaged in his fixating stare but it was not long before his friends noticed his distraction and started pulling his legs .The involvement of third party does rock the show for budding romance and soon the girl's friends were aware of the leg-pulling and commotion in the boys' table in the neighborhood. Soon it resulted in an exchange of sideward glances and of comments, ultimately moving on to shouting smart repartees over the tables and a mélange of Hindi film songs doing the rounds to add that catalyst, to flame the fire of budding passion in two hearts.

Raja moved with smart expertise to douse the commotion by approaching the girl and introducing himself.

"Hi, I am Raja", said he "and I have been watching you from that table over there. I think I would like to know you better."

"Hello, I am Jhankaar", she said.

"So would you like to go out on a date with me, Jhankaar?"

"Date?  I don't think so. My parents wouldn't allow me to go out on a date with a boy"

"O.k. so how can I get to know you better? Wouldn't you like to be friends with me?"

"I don't know. I don't think I can go out with you all alone."

"Listen, come out with me some day to a restaurant and don't tell anything about it to your parents. Can you manage that?"

"No, I cannot."

"Then what do we do to further our friendship?"

Rita butts in at this moment. "Why don't you folks meet up at my place when my parents are out on work? I am sure Jhankaar wouldn't feel uncomfortable about that."

 "O.k", said Jhankaar.

"O.k. then, let's make it for next Saturday morning. Is that fine with you, Mr. Raja?"

"Perfect", said Raja hurriedly before Jhankaar could change her mind about it, "I will be there at 10.00 am. Just give me the address and telephone nos."

Rita quickly took out a scrap of paper from her bag and wrote down the address and telephone nos. and handed it to Raja.

So the newly introduced Romeo and Juliet parted ways in true romantic style, after a further tête-à-tête in one of the adjoining tables, as he picked up the tabs for her table and gave her a rose, pulled out from the vase on the restaurant table. The meeting was fixed for a week-end, a week later. The whole week passed in slow motion for Raja, who kept visualizing her calm face with rosy tints on the angles of her high cheek bones and her honest, lazy smile parting her not to full, rosy lips with easy comfort. For a creative person like him, being in advertising, it had been easy to meet up with a bevy of beautiful ladies but somehow he was turned off by the models' plastic looks and uniform mannerisms. He had had a couple of affairs in the past, one with a copywriter friend and another a model but both ended pretty soon because somehow he lost interest mid-way. He had come to realize that attitude of girls in his industry were usually hardened by the realities of life and they were way too well versed with the ways of the world to retain any feminine softness in their outlook towards life. Their boundaries became blurred and the distrusting masculine part of their personalities usually came to the forefront to guard them from the harsh glare of the glamour industry. He was attracted to fresh and natural beauty and that was what attracted him to Jhankaar in the first instance. Also talking to her was like a breath of fresh air when he realized how vulnerable and trusting she sounded as she told him about her education and other stuff. She was just out of college, she had said and she had no major career plans, so she was just whiling away her time with friends. "Jhankaar"- her name was like sweet honey as he murmured it under his breath and her haunting, innocence and beauty pervaded his dreams - sleeping and awake, for the whole week. He decided to make his next meeting worthwhile and shopped for the perfect gift to adorn her with. He found a hair-pin done in stone, beautifully engraved with roses, the rim of its petals asymmetrically lined with artificial stones, looking as if the petals were lined with dew-drops. He bought it for her and packed it himself, in transparent cellophane paper with a thin ribbon holding the packet at its mouth, in the shape of a bud rose. He waited with eager anticipation for the forthcoming meeting.     

 To Be Continued…