Can YOU guess wat Mother Nature is trying to tell us???
P.S. God ain’t dead - she jus got the hell outa here!
Like Mother, Like Daughter
November 4th, 2008 9 comments »
You know it”s quite difficult to pinpoint the exact moment when it all happened. One minute we're little girls are standing in front of the mirror in our mother”s best diamante and lipstick, desperate to be just like the perfume-scented goddess who tucks us up each night. FLASH! And the next minute, the idea of turning into the same woman becomes a nightmare. In fact, the fear of being like one”s mother is such a terror for many women that it even has a name: matrophobia. This matrophobia was rampant in the western world and has slowly crept into the Indian psyche as well. If you think that the idea of turning into your mother is scary ' imagine the plight of scores of women who's husbands want them to be "just like" their mothers!?
Even now, it horrifies me that I can get so irritated by her. She has a knack of not saying what she means, but still putting you down perfectly. Last time I was going to meet my friends; she took one look at me in my denims folded up to my calves and the sleeveless t-shirt and said how lovely they were. That was swiftly followed by a comment about how all the young girls were wearing them, and how brave I was at my age. I heard myself using exactly the same put-down with my best friend a couple of days later!!! OH-MY-GOD!
But why should turning into our mother be such a bad outcome? Some psychologist say that the relationship is totally different from any other in our lives and it is no surprise that strong feelings can be invoked when it looks as though history may be repeating itself every time we look in the mirror.
Most of us have “issues” with our mothers, and resolving these issues in a way that allows the relationship to function tells us as much about ourselves as about the woman who brought us into the world. Any woman who has a fear of turning into “mommie dearest” may first of all have to ask herself what exactly is she running away from.
I love my mother [and my dad too but this article is for mothers onlyJ] dearly, sadly I also have problems and quite a few verbal combats with her. Moreover, describing the relationship between mothers and daughters [as is between fathers and sons] as problematical isn”t news. However, accepting that there are patterns of behaviour that can be negative or positive depending on our own adult approach may fundamentally alter how women view themselves.
For many women, the problem lies with changing into what they think their mother is, rather than the reality of who she really is. Most of us don”t have a clue about the kind of lives our mother”s have lived - apart from what affects us directly. For many years our mum is just our mum. She only exists as that character. When we realize she has friends we don”t know about, a personality we don”t recognize, a sex life, interests - everything that you have - it changes things. I can”t imagine what else we don”t know about our mothers - because we never really ask, do we?
You may be scared of turning into your mother, but it”s likely that she herself would make different choices if she had your opportunities. Women who are successful in business nowadays judge that success in terms of how they balance all aspects of their lives. Not just about how many hours they put in or what their salary is. The ones who manage it best often say that it was their mothers who gave them that grounding and that it is those same mothers that they think of with pride and a new awareness, no matter how much they have achieved themselves. It is interesting the number of women, who say that their mothers have been their greatest influence, but this is not always in the ways that you may expect - it”s not always working mothers who inspire their daughters to succeed, but rather its mothers who have clear values generally.
My mother has always been the wind beneath my wings; she's always given me the courage to go on even when I felt like just curling up and dying! I've always had total freedom to live my life on my terms and the freedom to make my own decisions and she also gave me the courage to stay grounded even when things didn't quite go according to plan. I think that daughters should all know that their mothers did the best they could with what was available to them at the time. And the more I try not to be like my mother ' the more I want to be just like her!
Perhaps the transformation into the woman who gave you life isn”t always quite as awful as so many women - and stand-up comics - seem to think. I”m trying to come to terms with the fact that my mum actually has a lot of good points. While I”ve got her mood swings and her martyrdom down to a fine art. She still drives me mad in lots of ways - this is a woman who alphabetizes her spices, and wakes up at 345am to dust the house - but I see now that she gave me lots of other values I laughed at as an adolescent, and which really matter now.
None of us, of course, ever knows our mothers before we ourselves become mothers. And so often it is only when we have children ourselves that we come to understand them. My friend did not have her two daughters until after her mother had died. Having children opened her eyes. She once said to me - I confess I have turned into my mother. Once, I would have shuddered at the idea of turning into her. Now I”m proud of it. But it was only after she died that I bothered to find out properly about her life before she had children. I just didn”t realize she was so like me. So really, I”ve been just like my mother all along.
The mother-child relationship is paradoxical and, in a sense, tragic. It requires the most intense love on the mother”s side, yet this very love must help the child grow away from the mother, and to become fully independent.
Do we ever think about life from her perspective??? Or is it all about "me Me .ME"!
You are what you think!
October 20th, 2008 7 comments »
When beleaguered by a crisis, it is not a time for mincing words. So let me be as transparently honest as possible. We are killing ourselves and don”t even realize it. I”m not talking about homicidal killings, for they are no comparison to the death toll that we are racking up on a daily basis because of our poor eating habits and refusal to be physically active. Thousands are dying every day from illnesses such as type 2 diabetes, heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure and some forms of cancer or the other - illnesses that are largely preventable with small lifestyle changes and a big determination to live.
I have personally gone through all of the emotions when I think about of this senseless suffering and death. I”m angry that we say we love ourselves and each other, yet do things to our bodies that will only cause harm. I”m sad that so many of us lie in hospital beds, lonely and fearful about these illnesses that are destroying our bodies and taking us too soon.
U ask ' what give me the authority to begin my sermon from the mount? Well to be honest, I've been there, done it and screwed things up so wonderfully that I could actually hold those sermons! I've always had a great fondness to hospitals considering I've been in and ' thankfully ' out of them thrice already! Mundane surgeries, doctors and nurses dressed in bilious green garbs walking about officiously and god help you if u have to undergo surgery! Then out come the razors and the needles and poking and prodding not to mention the yanking and yelling! Have you noticed how their hands are never warm??? Brrrrrr brings back some chilling memories.
But in all fairness, I did have the best possible time in
Anyway, am here talking about the problems issues we have wid being over-weight ' or as they like to call it Type A / B / C obese!
I have always considered myself a fairly fit person, never given much thought to workouts as a means to keeping fit but I guess wen you're young ' one tends to believe they are infallible! Late nights, beer and smokes filled the weekends and sometime spilled into the week as well was quite fortunate that the pounds kept sliding off the belly and butt J slim and trim as my dad would say!
Sometime in 2004 I was diagnosed as having hypo-thyroid! Or the lazy thyroid that just sits on the lounger and doesn't do a jot of work! I guess, like me ' like thyroid J and then the pounds kept accumulating and much like the Country's inflation my weight kept increasing wid no sign or inclination of any respite!
2005 and I went under the knife once again, and was instructed by the doc to abstain from exercising as they were internal sutures and would probably take a longer time to heal. I'm like "Yeah! Exercise!? Who me?" and then did all the infallible stuff again wid the ready excuse that I couldn't exercise ' doc's orders! Those were the magic words, and no one said a word about the way I was beginning to look like a Goodyear blimp!
My cousins and aunts would warn me that if I got any bigger no would marry me! Am like "Yeah! Ok, and that's a problem? Why???" love me love my weight - Kinda logic! You know how it is in the beginning ' its all about self-denial, den realization dawns, then the desire to do "something" gets stronger and finally u get off dat big arse and actually do something about it! Well I did the same thing! After all, de average woman would prefer to be beautiful rather than have brains coz de average man can see better than he can think! J
We as people are pretty darn shallow! We could look and behave like the south-end of a north bound cow but we want our bf / gf / husband / wife to look like dey jus walked off the playboy magazine or the Chippendales show. And then we get the feeling that we might as well "settle" since we ain't gonna find the dream man/woman!
Anyway, I decided that if I was gonna do something about my weight then it's coz I wanna feel good about myself and be healthy and not for some shallow Hal who believes that a woman's face is her only fortune! I hauled my big arse off the couch and went to my doc. Got an ok from her and went straight from the consultation room to enroll myself in the gym!
I got as far as the door - saw my pathetic self in the mirror and made a U-turn and got the hell outa there! I decided that if I was gonna do this, I might as well do it the right way. I have a friend who was nutritionists at one of the leading slimming centers! She has requested I don't mention names ' hence none will be mentioned J
Anyway . Like I was saying, she put me on a strict diet, not the "loose weight quick" ones. She said ' smaller quantities at lesser interval wid lotsa H2O ' with the regular walking exercise. And I saw the kilos falling off! I mean it ' literally! I lost approx 20 kgs in 5 months ' believe me wen I say this has been a labour of love ' love for life, love for good health ' of mine! J
As a birthday present - My friends gifted me a 3 month membership at a wonderful gym in Bangalore, and taking into consideration my medical history ' they have me on a circuit training dat includes aerobics and gym ' my instructor has tailored this session specifically for me and its helping tighten the skin and tone up the body and muscles. I have a target of another 10 - 15 kgs to loose.
My weight loss hasn't been a walk in the park and believe me wen I say this but its really tough to keep the motivation going coz in the first one month u don't actually see any results and dats the crucial month wen u need to just hang in there and trust ur instructor! I'm glad I did!
Keeping fit is not just about being able to fit into sexier clothes ' but rather about endorphins and being healthy! Believe me ' if I can do it so can u - considering I'm by far the laziest person this side of the
There’s this book called “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne. If you haven't read it then I suggest that u do. U may think it”s a little cheesy and, maybe it is, maybe a little simplistic to. But its principal theme - that we become what we think about - is gold. what she’s written about is plain and simple POSITIVE THINKING. we all KNOW it works but how many of really follow it???
Another trick I learnt was every night after my hail mary’s i would have a silent conversation wid my head [the root cause of all ill's :-)] and say “today you;re gonne work wid me and eat the fat”.. believe me it worked miracles for me!
Why the interest? What”s the magic? The book says “Thoughts are magnetic, and thoughts have a frequency. As you think, those thoughts are sent out into the Universe, and they magnetically attract all like things that are on the same frequency. Everything sent out returns to the source. And that source is YOU.”
Am sure there are a few who will read this book and say "DE gustibus non est disputandum [transalated it means There's no accounting for taste], yeah yeah, but there”s also no disputing that the world is full of fools" or "There is no limit to the audacity of the conclusions Byrne draws from her silly little premise". But the fact remains ' we all have the answers to what we should do and yet we don't! I don't want to take up too much space debating on the book in this article, will keep it for another day!
In 1983, I sat by myself in front of my friends VCR ' we didn't' have one those days - watching the movie “Flashdance.” It was about chasing a dream. Do any of u rem seeing it???
Jus turned 40 last month. My life”s not over, it's only jus begun. I”m thinking now about the kind of huge things that I should have been thinking about then. I can clearly see myself doing them. I still eat fries, drink beer, smoke, eat fried fish etc… but all in moderation and work the fat the next day!
One of my favorite scenes in my favorite movie, “Rocky,” is when Mickey tries to convince Rocky to let him be his manager. “I don”t want what happened to me to happen to you,” he says.
Neither do I. Dream big. Eat small and have a kick arse body and a fantabulous life.
Amazing Nature
October 11th, 2008 4 comments »
Transparent Butterfly comes from Central America and is found from Mexico to Panama . It is quite common in its zone, but it not easy to find because of its transparent wings, which is a natural camouflage mechanism.
A
butterfly with transparent wings is rare and
beautiful.''
As delicate as finely blown glass, the presence of this rare tropical gem is used by rain forest ecologists as an indication of high habitat quality and its demise alerts them of ecological
change.' Rivaling the refined beauty of a stained glass window, the translucent wings of the Glasswing butterfly shimmer in the sunlight like polished panes of turquoise, orange, green, and red. All things beautiful do not have to be
full of color to be noticed: in life that which is unnoticed has the most power.
Really
something isn’t it?'
Try your luck!
October 7th, 2008 2 comments »
I wouldn”t be posting this here if the answers to the quiz didn”t completely take me by s”prise. Take some time out to do it - seriously! Here”s wishing that your dreams come true!
There are only 4 questions but the results are very interesting. I was kind of shocked by what some of my answers meant. Be honest and honor what pops into your mind when the questions present themselves.
http://memoriter.net/flash/test.html
I want to know what love is
September 15th, 2008 4 comments »I want to know what love is - by Foreigner
I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when Im older
Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder
In my life theres been heartache and pain
I dont know if I can face it again
Cant stop now, Ive traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
Im gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me
Ive got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me
In my life theres been heartache and pain
I dont know if I can face it again
I cant stop now, Ive traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
And I wanna feel, I want to feel what love is
And I know, I know you can show me
Lets talk about love
I wanna know what love is, the love that you feel inside
I want you to show me, and Im feeling so much love
I wanna feel what love is, no, you just cannot hide
I know you can show me, yeah
I wanna know what love is, lets talk about love
I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too
I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too
And I know and I know, I know you can show me
Show me love is real, yeah
I wanna know what love is…
Sometimes
September 10th, 2008 9 comments »
Sometimes you gotta run away
So you can see who will run after you.
Sometimes you gotta talk quieter
Just to see who's listening.
Sometimes you gotta step up in a fight
Just to see who's by your side.
Sometimes you gotta make a wrong decision
Just to see who's there to help you fix it.
Sometimes you gotta let go of the one you love
Just to see if they love you enough to come back.
Sometimes, no matter how much faith we have, we lose people. But you never forget them. And sometimes, it’s those memories that give us the faith to go on.
Sometimes you meet people who forget you. You forget people you meet.
But sometimes you meet those people you can’t forget. Those are your ‘friends’.
Weight Loss Program
September 1st, 2008 7 comments »A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there”s a knock on the door and there standing before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads: “If you can catch me, you can haveme.”
On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lb.as promised. He then calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program. The next day there”s a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life.She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads: “If you catch me, you can have me.” Well, he”s out the door after her like a shot! This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her; but when he does, it”s definitely worth every muscle cramp and wheeze. So for the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself to discover that he has lost another 20 lb as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.. “Are you sure?” asks the representative on the phone, “This is our most rigorous program.”
“Absolutely,” he replies, “I haven”t felt this good in years.”
The next day there”s a knock at the door and he runs like hell to open the door.. When he opens the door he finds this huge, muscular, 7ft man standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads: “I”m Francis. If I catch you, you”re mine.”
